What's your worst ever date...?

[Fozziebearmum]

I once went on an internet date...we'd been chatting for a week or two online and he seemed normal. But after 5 MINS of meeting, he went to the toilet and returned to say...

• he really liked me had just called his friends to tell them and I could meet them next time
• that he needed to be straight with me that he was having a back operation (didn't sound like a big deal so had no idea why he was even telling me)

And... It later became apparent he didn't have a BA which was listed on his profile. He'd never been to uni, but had in fact been single for a while and thought that that's what the online question had meant when asked if he has a Bachelor of Arts....

There must be better ones out there than this though!

Went out on a dinner date with a guy who seemed nice and normal. Waiter came to take our order and he ordered steak but then asked waiter if he could make sure it was very rare, as "I don't have any back teeth, just gums, so I can't chew." In response to our puzzled/horrified looks we got a high volume explanation about how he was waiting for implants and just had to "mush food around a bit" in order to eat. He even told the neighbouring table all about it. Food arrived and my appetite left. Proper stomach churning stuff.

Met a penfriend in London yonks ago. Went to see 39 Step0s at Odeon in Leic Square. She said you can come back to my place "But I do have a poker" So did I, but I turned down the offer

I've been on a fair few internet dates and they were almost all very nice guys, polite, kind and not at all letchy. I never had anyone be abusive when I turned down a second date either, i think now I must have been really really lucky!

My most disappointing date was with a very clever interesting guy who I had been emailing for ages and seemingly got on like a house on fire with. He had a fascinating job and we met at last where he worked because he wanted to show me some cool stuff. It should have been so right but when he showed up he was at least five inches shorter than me (on his profile it said we were the same height). He was like a tiny scruffy hairy hobbit man, I so didn't fancy him. Then, worse, for someone that had come over so witty and smart in written conversation, he had a really droney lecturing way of speaking and was just very very boring to listen to. It was such a shame but I was just so disappointed I never saw him again. That probably wasn't very fair of me I guess.

The most worrying date I had was a second one with a very smart good looking Scottish guy. He took me to a lovely restaurant and we had a good conversation except for one weird bit where he explained his rather odd beliefs about time and existence which basically seemed to imply that you could do really bad stuff in life and it didn't matter, other people were of no consequence etc. Hmmm. We went for a walk along the beach afterwards holding hands when he just suddenly got really really randy and had his hands inside my underwear and me (ahem), all WAY too intimate. I manoeuvred him back to the safety of a pub but he carried on doing it, in public! When I said i was calling it a day he said he would walk me home. When I told him i lived miles away and was driving he got a bit fed up and said he had chosen the restaurant because he thought it was where I lived and that he would be coming back to mine. I got in my car fast and drove a weird way home in case he was following me. Later I thought maybe i was over-reacting (I wasn't long out of my very long marriage and thought maybe I was just a bit out of the loop with dating) but in the night I woke from a terrible nightmare trying to scream but being unable to because he was strangling me. It was so vivid I decided I probably needed to listen to my subconscious on this occasion and ended it by text the next morning.

I'm now with a very lovely much younger bloke thanks to internet dating so it can work too...

Gosh nancy that is a bad dream!!! I once had a dream about my then boyfriend, where I was in my car in his tone, only the passenger seat was the only thing left of it! The drivers seat, steering wheel, back seat, windows, furry carpeted bits of the boot, wheels everything was gone, and I woke up saying to myself 'don't lose your driving seat with this man...'

Mine was with a guy who took me out for a lovely meal, a walk along the seafront, drink in the pub - all going well. Until as he drove me home,when he asked me to get a tape out of the glove box, so I rummage through the tapes to find a decent one, only to see that they were all UVF marching songs, and there was a gun underneath them as well. I shat myself all the way home. Then he got really really mad when I said the next day that I didn't want to see him again and he didn't get the message for months, kept turning up at our house & causing trouble, really quite scary.

First date since the end of an EA marriage and the guy appears at a coffee shop. Asks if I'm hungry (I wasn't) and proceeded to eat and talk at me for an hour resulting in spraying egg mayo all over me - haven't been able to eat eggs since!

Two cracking dates which spring to mind..
First one was a lovely guy I knew as friends before and I had high hopes for, we decided to take the friendship further and go on a date. He arranged 'a table' and I dressed up ready to be picked up by him.
He arrived, in a suit, bearing flowers, and after driving for 30 mins on a motorway, announced we were at the place we would be having dinner... Gordano service station. Very awkward collecting our meal on a tray dressed to the nines.
Second BAD date, knew I liked live music and so arrange tickets to see a live band. Lovely, I thought.. He picked me up and I took me to a frigging Michael Crawford concert for 3 hours. Truely awful, especially as my date was obviously moved by the performance and got really emotional and teary.

After I was widowed I met a man, first one since th had died. When we first had sex, afterwards he said that he found foreplay really boring so couldn't be bothered doing it needless to say the relationship never went further!

Haha cathers those are TERRIBLE dates! Poor you!

Two spring to mind.

I met bloke 1 in a club when I was hammered and he'd seemed a really good laugh but on our date we sat in a pub and I quickly realised he had no conversation skills. At all. In fact he seemed to have memorised a joke book and sadly not a good one either. He just sat there telling one terrible contrived joke after another while I sat there looking like this: It was awful. I fucking hate contrived jokes and the relentlessness of his joke telling wore thin very fast.

Bloke 2 was another bloke I'd met in a club. He was really good looking and I had high hopes but he just belched loudly constantly. I have no idea to this day why he was doing it or whether I was supposed to be impressed but it was horrific. I hate belching and these were really loud to the point where people around us kept looking round.

Bizarrely in both cases they were baffled as to why I didn't want a second date.

Many years ago. I was in the process of getting divorced, living alone. I was set up on a date by a friend in another country, who had a colleague who was coming to the UK for a conference and didn't know anyone here. Sounded nice, I was stressed and lonely at the time...

It was 5 November so I arranged to go to a really nice restaurant overlooking where there would be good fireworks. It had the potential to be quite a special evening...I got all gussied up and sallied forth, meeting him in the lobby of the hotel where the restaurant was (very swish hotel and very smart restaurant). I looked good, little black number I think, high heels etc etc (I was younger and slimmer then!).

Guy turned up, dressed in what can only be described as comfy slacks, and a PALE BLUE WOOLLY CARDIGAN. (I should have left then..!). Turned out he was a gastroenterologist and enjoyed talking about his work over dinner. Hmm. Also turned out he was also going through a divorce, but unlike me he went on endlessly about how awful his ex was. He noticed neither me not the lovely setting as far as I could discern. At the end of the meal when the bill came he simply passed it to me and then went to the toilet. Then he asked me to drive him back to his hotel. I was a mug and I did.

Later when he was back home and he heard I was going to be in his country for a visit he enquired of my friend whether I might like to go out with him again...you can guess the answer!

These are hilarious!
Not precisely a date, but... When I was a teen I used todo loads of babysitting. One family asked me to come round, and I babysat their little boy a few times. Turned out the father was an alcoholic. He started coming back home early to cry on my shoulder about how awful his life was and his wife was threatening to leave if he didn't but he couldn't give up the drink. I was only 14 and far too nice, and apart from being exasperated was genuinely sympathetic - he was just so WEAK!, gradually it changed from crying on my shoulder to crying and patting my knee and saying how wonderful I was, then on one memorable winter evening with the stars bright in the sky he walked me home and said half way " I want to have an affair with you".

What an offer eh? What would you have said at 14? I managed to squeak a 'no'.

Babysat a few more times til his wife left with the kid. She was a hero of mine for a while. He kept undressing me with his eyes whenever we met. Lovely.

'At the end of the meal when the bill came he simply passed it to me and then went to the toilet.'

I'd have paid half, then got up and left. In fact, that's what I've done in the past when chancers have tried that on.

I had a huge crush on a friends brother for years.
I bumped into him in London ( bizarre coincidence) and he asked me out so far so good
We met that night for dinner ,great conversation,food and then he kissed me... bit my lip by accident .
Okay try again .. bit my lip and smashed his teeth into mine.
There was NO chemistry < sob>

Sorry ladies, but I have the worst date story ever. I've nc for this as it will out me immediately, unless this guy makes a habit of it!

Internet date, but he checked out - reasonable job, divorced etc. Discussing exes, his was Irish, ExH is African, "you mean he is black?" and continued amazement.

A few mins later discussing DCs (he had two), he said "why didn't you have an abortion, if you knew the baby was black?"

I just walked off. To cap it off, he emailed me a couple of days later to say if I could just my behaviour, he would give me another chance .

Oh, he wouldn't have got away with that now! I was miserable and lacking in confidence at that stage, following having made a real hash of my relationships. Even a pale blue cardigan, hearing a lecture on the gut and footing a hefty bill seemed a tiny bit better than spending the evening alone, the way I was feeling then. Sad but true...and never to be repeated!

my two worst dates both with italians!! and they are such charming lovers, right?!!?

one ordered for me which annoyed me, i had told him i didn't like moules. he ate all mine too and then breathed garlic all over me. yak.

also met up with a Donato (gift, ha ha) after meeting him at a party, he was entertaining, but he asked me did he make me feel old. i was only four years older than him fgs. I told him he himself would be 28 in the blink of an eye and to pop off and mix with 24 years olds.

I was quite assertive and had good boundaries in my 20s, and i think ten years of shit dates made me give up and go out with my xh.

Love the 21yr old with the pipe and monocle way back in the thread!

Mine were pre marriage and pre internet and all of that...

First one I met in a club, he was a friend of a friend. We arranged to go out the following week. I had just moved into a lovely flat and he rang doorbell as arranged. He asked if he could use the loo before we go out. Fine says I. He was in there ages and he kept pulling the flush again and again. Anyway... off we went out, drink meal etc, he goes home I go home. Reasonable date I thought, got read for bed, went to bathroom.

Well, in the name of all that is holy... I have never seen such a huge logger in my toilet. It must have been 2 foot long and coiled like a snake halfway up the toilet bowl. No wonder he couldn't flush it away and I had to deal with it... sort of put me off as you can imagine!

Other disaster...
This was a blind date through a newspaper ad. He said in the newspaper ad he was 5ft10 (I am TALL) and he sounded OK. We met at a country pub. Flipping heck.. he was 5ft3 if that and he looked like a little schoolboy with a tiny suit on and if that wasn't bad enough he had a tie on that was on elastic. He kept adjusting it and pulling it up and down. He had the squeakiest voice ever and he could barely see over the bar. I felt like his mother!

He went to the loo and the barman said "what's a gorgeous girl like you doing with him?" It was all so painful and I was very naughty. but in my defence he did LIE about his height

I went to the loo and I climbed out the window and I drove home.

Rousette they are classic!!!

See, I wonder about leaving without actually saying anything.
Not that I can't see why you climbed out the window, but I recently met a guy who seems nice, but he told me about an internet date with someone he had been chatting with online...turns out she got really drunk and started haranguing him (not sure about what) and he did the same-well, pretended to be going to the toilet and then left.
This has kind of put me off him, as I think, really, he should have been man enough to stand up and say "I'm leaving now".
Is this me being overly picky?

I just can't get over how entitled and deluded so many of these 'men' are! They're like the date equivalent of those wankers who catcall and then turn nasty when they're ignored or told off for it.

I don't have any remotely as jaw-dropping as most of these. Once I went out with a guy who stole a necklace my best friend had made for me and I had hanging off my rear view mirror when I was driving him home. He also spent most of that evening rubbishing my taste in music. He also expected a snog at the end!

I once fell asleep whilst dtd with a very boring man I was, ironically, dating out of boredom.
I should have heeded the warning signs, first time I went back to his after a date he immediately produced receipts from our day out, got out a large note pad and wrote down every penny he'd spent.
I suppose that's his bad date story though!
Worst of it is he's the brother of a friend of mine and I still have to see him occasionally .

IfNotNowThenWhen

"he should have been man enough to stand up and say "I'm leaving now"."

You mean like so many women do?

I turned up for a blind date to find date + "chaperone", It became fairly obvious fairly quickly that the "date" was just a way for them to get a free meal before a night out.

I said that I was going to the toilet and left, IfNotNowThenWhen why should I show them respect when they had none for me?

A very long time ago, one of my schoolmates joined the RAF and we became penpals. A while later, he asked me if I would also write to his friend, Barry, who didn't have anyone to write to. Exchanging letters, Barry and I got on like a house on fire. Months later we arranged to meet when he had weekend leave. I knew what he looked like so I knew what to expect at the train station. What I didn't expect was the very broad Glaswegian accent he had. Being a South-West bumpkin, I couldn't understand a single thing he said. It was the worst date.