Dumpable offence?

[keepingthelidon]

Have been seeing a man for a few weeks, Last time i saw him we have sex for the first time and it was nice
. Saw him again last night, expected more of the same, but he made no moves towards me, wasnt affectionate at all. When we did finally kiss, i took him upstairs where he made no moves on me, but happily recieved some oral. he was naked and i was fully dressed. I was somewhat put out, but thought, ok, maybe he had just been enjoying it too much, so waited around for a second go.
He said the words ' do you want me to put my willy inside you' to which i burst out laughing, because its just not sexy, at all. We did for a bit, swapped position, and then he complained he was being bent in a weird way, so i moved and then he just laid there and didnt restart anything, while i lay there feeling awkward and rejected. After a bit of time i said i needed to sleep and he left.

The whole thing, to me, felt awkward and like he wasnt enjoying any of it, which is quite confusing.

Other than that we had a nice time, but my immediate reaction is to dump as im no longer interested.

views?

keeping you did the right thing. it was not to be. he did behave like an arse. he may not have intended do (as he may have mistakenly thought he was over her) but his subsequent behaviour, sending you all those texts is unneccessary at best, total dickhead at worst.

Keeping the lid on: Well then, I guess that you slept with him too soon. And that is your fault.

Talulah next time you feel the time is right for you, you might find those judgy pants are so far up your arse they are seriously going to get in your way.

God he sounded revolting - well rid.

Oh, god, it's the starving artist loser! I forgot about him because he's such a reject. The question you really need to ask yourself is why you waste a second of your time with guys who let you know early on that they are utter wasters. You're still doing it because he's still texting you. Who cares if he's into his ex, blah blah blah, he's a shite shag with no fucking job! LOSER! Stop wasting your time and giving chances to rejects.

expat A woman after my own heart.

I ' wasted' a bit of time on him as i liked him as a person and im not material. The next date i found out he does ok... its just not a 9-5 job, so a bit different to the norm.

I possibly should have paid more attention to the living on toast thing, it wasnt because he cant afford anything, but just that hes lazy and thats easy, but its part of the getting to know you thing... isnt it.

expat- since i am not in control of him sending texts, im not wasting time on him. I cant block him as my phone doesnt allow it. Im just not responding.

he wasnt a shite shag the first time round, but was the second and i dumped him, all this other stuff has come out since.

Kudos to me i think.

OP, I hope you are okay. He sounds like he really isn't worth bothering about.

I think he deliberately led you on, because, let's face it, what man wouldn't want to have sex with someone who they knew was really into them.

No man deliberately gets rid of good sex. You confronted him about his issues and he had no choice but to 'fess up (oops, was that one of the phrases that makes mumsnets' blood boil )

And he will continue to text you because he knows that you drew the short straw.

i will be fine. Im hurt right at the moment and a bit embarassed, but i shall live.

and yes, he admitted that he wasnt going to say anything at all, it was just because i said something that he had to. Because, well, he had to.

Im not sure i will hear from him again, i think it suits the tortured, starving musican thing too much for him to be depressed and lonely.

It does sound as though you've had a lucky escape.

OP, you have NOTHING to be embarrassed about. He does though.