The Brave Babes Battle Bus - A New Year, A New YOU!

[Mouseface]

New Year Resolutions Anyone?

Welcome one and all, I'm Mouse, nice to meet YOU. :)

This is a thread for those who want to give up drink completely, or are maybe thinking about doing controlled drinking, or cutting down slowly, it's all up to you.

You know your limits, you know what is required, it's in YOUR hands.

Whatever your goal, you'll find unconditional support here. Always.

There will be talk of drinking quite often and those who fall off the Bus will post about it, so if that is going to jeopardise your chances of complete sobriety, then maybe the DRY threads would suit you better, as they are complete abstainers, but EVERYONE IS WELCOME HERE :)

There are no hard and fast rules, other than the support here is unconditional, it may be in the form of tough love at times, but it's always meant with the very best of intentions.

There are two sayings that we rather like here -

1. • The Vulnerable Need Our Support, Not Our Judgement
2. • Alcohol Fosters Inertia

For those of you who'd like some history, here is the very first thread and the reason that we're all here now. FIRST THREAD

And here is the lastest thread, which you can scroll back through to see the other JOURNEYS SO FAR

The Bus may be 'mythical', but the support is real, it is honest and it will help you to achieve what it is that you seek, as long as you are honest with us, but mostly, YOURSELF

See you soon. x

Hi Sui welcome to the bus. The best advice I can give you is to keep posting.

Get your thoughts down, even if it's just to get it out of your head. You can come here for a chat, a distraction, a rant at the unfairness of it all, whatever.

It's a good idea to plan other things to do to change some habits. Could you go for a swim or something at about six, then come home and eat a meal then phone a friend for a chat and get an early night with a good book.

Try to keep your hands busy. Jigsaw puzzle, knitting, painting?

Hi babes - looking in after a hectic few days. DS watching footie and I am waiting to pick up dd from a party.

Not been drinking much lately - decided not to drink Sunday - Thursdays cos have to be up for work, and I do a killer tabata exercise class on Saturday mornings so daren't drink on a Friday or I would vomit on my trainers - feel like being sick in that class even when I've not had a drink!

Had 2 glasses of red last night and wanted more but forced myself to go to bed. It worries me how much I want to carry on drinking once I've started though ... I am OK abstaining after the killer first few AF days but then once I start .... This bus is a lifeline though, I often think of you when I'm considering another glass and it helps me say no to myself.

Having said that I am off for half term now so there is the temptation to have a glass or two when I don't have a busy day coming up. Trying to moderate at the moment, and exercise a lot, but my diet has gone to the dogs - can't seem to say no to the sweet stuff and I don't usually have a sweet tooth. Someone give me a slap with Barrie!

Thinking of going back on low-carb diet, so are there any low-carb babes out there for support and advice?

Anne, Beaches - how are your Fit February resolutions coming on?

Welcome Spinach and Sui. There are wiser babes than me to give specific advice here, but all I can say is stick around, because this bus really is magic. (sneaks opal fruits to the new girls and pockets one surreptitiously before taking seat next to Ma and offering her some lemsip, tissues and hot chocolate)

Why, Isinde, Pink, Its, Sweet, Spanna, Baby, Soc, and everyone I've not managed to NC - hope you are all having a lovely weekend.

Mouse, hope you feel better soon and love to Nemo.

I'm - are you lurking on the back seat somewhere? How's it going with you?

Ooops, Faire didn't see you there (waves, tries to conceal opal fruit wrappers under seat). Guggs, hello to you too - how many days until you can leave work?

Thanks for the welcome it's hard for me to do anything as I'm very depressed and lack energy today has been a hard day.

The early days are the hardest Sui, it does get easier. How about changing your name to something more positive? (In my head I'm calling you Sue ).

Hope I've always gone 'off diet' during school holidays. I'm fine for six to eight weeks because, as you say, I'm busy but the holidays always trip me up. BUT - not this time

For the first time ever, I am pushing on through the holidays. Friday was the hardest, yesterday wasn't too bad and so far today I'm fine. So, not drinking and sticking to diet. 11lbs gone so far this year.

Afternoon, tis me, Mouse

Pink - Lovely to see you, I think that Lonni posts on the DRY threads these days :) WELL DONE ON !!) DAYS AF! That's brilliant, really amazing, especially through Christmas and NY x

Dancer - you bloody go girl! Like so many other mum's you put your wants and needs to the back of the queue, the whole "It's only going to get sick/food/grubby hand prints down it" thoughts fly through your head and also the "I'll never wear it will I? so why waste the money when I can spend it on XYZ?"

So I'm glad that you treated yourself to something more than the norm, and as you say, you've kicked the fags and booze for a month so hell yeah, get your shopping on! :)

Ma - glad you're better, I've only just got out of bed...... I have a history of kidney problems due to alcohol and drug abuse in my late teens, early twenties so if I get run down - like now - I suffer. You know when you just know that something is going to happen...... I think I'm spoiling for an infection.

Welcome Sui :)

Whatever your addiction, you're welcome here :) I have to say that I expected more support from your GP, some sleepers at the very least to help you get through the nights without your smoke. I used to live with someone who smoked nothing but canabis all day long.

He'd smoked it for years, (he was my abuser and I used to believe that if he didn't smoke as much as he did as well as take coke and drink excessively, he'd not have been that man). The thing is, he was an abuser full stop. Drugs, alcohol, women, people in general. It was inbuilt with him. I thought I could change him, I thought if I loved him enough, he'd stop.

Why am I telling you this? Because YOU ARE HERE AND ASKING FOR SUPPORT, FOR HELP

He'd never be. He liked his 'life', the way he was.... Luckily, I got out.

You have asked for help and you will get it. You'll get exactly the same support that anyone with an alcohol addiction gets on here, an addiction is an addiction no matter what your weapon of choice, so get yourself a nice comfy seat.

Keep posting, write things down that become an obvious, every day, every hour or minute thought, read back through some of the older threads, the recent success stories too...

If you can find something to keep you busy during the just one time in one day when you'd normally be skinning up, then that is a huge achievement.

There's no magic wand, secret to success, book, or self help guide to getting clean, YOU HAVE TO WANT IT MORE THAN LIFE.

YOU ARE IN CONTROL.

If you hit the 'fuck it' button, then that is down to YOU. No-one else. It's YOU who takes the choice to smoke or pour a drink, same as the rest of us on here........

I'm glad you found the courage to be honest and post, especially with something so 'controversial' as drug addiction. Alcohol is so widely accepted isn't it? Smoking tobacco too but anything else and you are the spawn of Satan!

Sorry for the epic post and I hope you haven't been offended by my waffling on

Hey mouse good to see you
I managed out for a walk today in the rare sunshine and saw a bunch of snowdrops. There is hope that Spring is on its way....

Thanks fairynuff I can't change my name as I'm a regular name changer and I have a pychotic mental illness and the clue is every nickname I use is a description of how I feel but that's down to my MH and this is not a thread for that so I'll swiftly move on. Mouseface you certainly made me feel very welcome. I had a abusive drug abuser who had schizophrenia ex and I used to blame the schizophrenia. But I have a schizophrenic uncle and know quite a few lovely people with schizophrenia who are lovely. So in my opinion he was a abusive twat because he was a abusive twat nothing to do with his illness.

Evening all, hi sui. I'm a newbie here too, only been posting a few days. All I can say is that everyone here is very helpful and supportive, and you've found a good place to talk about whatever you need to!

Alcohol-free night for me again. Had 3 glasses of wine last night (well - in the interests of honesty - 2 large glasses and a couple of pulls on the cooking sherry ). Felt uurgh this morning. Been out for a run this evening, and am eating my dinner early, to get past the Witching Hour(s). Just turned down my DH asking if he should go to the shop to get something to drink - took some doing! Could murder a beer. Sigh. Got to keep thinking about all the lovely benefits!

Well done spinach
Wonder how many of us have done the cooking sherry thing?

Thanks ma. The cooking sherry thing is right up there in the Hall of Shame for me

Oh there's much worse....much!

I know. I was thinking through a few. Luckily most of them aren't current habits glad I squashed them!

Good evening all, big hugs and waves to you fab people.

Not done too bad this weekend. Not abstained, but not gone mad.

Treated myself to to Game of Thrones DVD's seasons 1-3. Really pleased as they came today, much earlier than expected, seeing as their release date was 17th Feb!! 15 discs...that should take the edge off my Wednesdays for a while....

Dementedma- the dress sounds great, and midnight blue is a beautiful colour - bet you'll knock 'em dead
Sui - welcome aboard Gerald. You'll get tons of support on here

Sui - good, everyone wants to feel welcomed here. That is the entire purpose of the Bus.

Right, bed.

New thread will be up tomorrow morning so panic not. I've done it, it just needs to 'go live' but I'll do that once I can get the links in.

Stay safe Babes - whatever your poison, fears, way of living day by day to get through the shit that's thrown our way........

Take control, own YOUR life, LIVE your life... mwahs xxx

Mwah to you too Mouse. Night all x

Hi babes and welcome to sui

So, I drank wine on Friday and Saturday. I had planned to, attempting to do controlled/moderated weekend drinking. I drank greedily on Saturday, opened the second bottle and kept pouring small amounts into my glass, each one was meant to be the last. Anyway, nothing awful happened (if you overlook all the bollocks I was repeating, loudly) Woke up at dawn feeling crap, sweaty and fuzzy. Today I have noticed a huge increase in wine thoughts and it was a big effort not to drink tonight. Thankfully a bath and a non alcohol beer got me through and I am feeling more relaxed now. And relieved.

I am writing it down to help me remain honest and mindful. Once I start, I find it very difficult to know when to stop. Abstaining is easier for me than controlling. Drinkers dawn is the pits. I cannot afford to be complacent, all my old habits are still there.

That is all really.

Have a good Monday xx

Hi beaches

Thanks for writing this. It's a nice reminder for myself too. I have no control once I start and the WW keeps whispering in my ear about 'controlled drinking'. I know I can't do it. As soon as I have half a glass of wine in me, it's all systems go to try and get as much down my throat as I can whilst pretending to everyone that I'm not drinking too much.

One or two glasses of wine holds zero interest to me, so why do I even bother having these thoughts?

Anyway, today is Day 26. Something of a miracle. I'm just going to keep going. I feel great. Boring as fuck, but great in every other respect so that wins over boring.

Soc xx

Hats off to you Soc, day 26 is the cats pyjamas!

You made me smile with the 'all systems go', that is exactly my default. It's why I stopped drinking early in the evening, I recognized years ago that once I started I didn't want to stop. I did not belong to the 'couple of glasses before dinner then a cup of tea after' brigade. My way of dealing with it was delaying the first glass in the vain hope of limiting consumption by confining the time. I think it increased my guzzle speed though.

Anyway, keep posting about how good you feel. It is nice to read xx

Morning babes, quick check in before I'm off to the gym :) I'm trying hard to establish some new good habits. The past week I've exercised more but have eaten rubbish! Fit February is not going well for me hope, put a pound on although body fat is slightly down.

I've drank 16 units last week, most on Saturday night. Not too happy it aa I drank more than intended on Saturday, got in a foul temper and was arguing with h. It sometimes happens that instead of getting happy drunk all my resentments come spilling out - I think h deserves to hear it but it doesn't make me feel better as it doesn't change anything. Had no hangover but awful session depression yesterday :(

Writing that down I think since january I've probably been comfort eating instead of blurring the edges with wine. Some how I'll have to find a new coping strategy as I'm stuck here for the next few years....sorry for the me me post, hope everyone has a good day and a happy half term :)

Well done on day 26 soc :)

Morning babes; haven't had a chance to read through thread but just wanted to post that today is Day 9 for me. I played the video through to the end on Friday and Saturday night and decided I would be better off staying at home and watching the telly rather than visit my friends house where we would drink too much and I would end up feeling like a dogs dinner the next day.

Sorry to hear there are some struggles, but they are all part of the learning aren't they. It is hard to change. Keep trying babes, you are doing great x

Soc well done on 26 days, that's brill

Beaches, Soc - yeah, what you said! That's me too. We had the bottle of Valentines Cava last night (romance on the cheap, that's him! Not that I can tell the difference) which was fine, then after a couple of glasses each he poured vodkas for us. Which was also fine, but after the film why did I sneak an extra slug of vodka before bed? And sneak one of his cigs to have in the garden like a spy? (I only smoke after a drink, and even that is quite new - gave up totally for years after having ds,even when I was hammered). Then I had an anxiety dream about drinking too much at a work event which I know was triggered by alcohol. I probably didn't even have loads, woke up totally clear headed today, but it is proof that once I start, that's it. Not going to drink tonight or tomorrow, then back to work for me. Salutary lesson though. I really can't moderate at home.

Anne, well done for getting yourself off to the gym lovely. I am also eating too much but working out like a demon. I have great muscle tone under there somewhere, I know it. Just need to shed the fat suit to find it! Need to lose 10lb but it is so hard after 40... Faire you are an inspiration, but just can't find the willpower to diet at the moment. Oh well, start again when I'm back to work. Taking kids to dentist soon, then later this afternoon poor dd has a double whammy - opticians appointment. I know she will need distance glasses, as she struggles to see the whiteboard at school, but she is so vain insecure about her looks, despite being gorgeous, that the very idea of braces and glasses is freaking her out. Am tempted to tell her to embrace geek chic, but she won't see the joke. Also she is TERRIFIED of dentists, almost to a phobic level. So, fun and expensive day ahead for me. I am almost as scared of the cost of the glasses that she will probably never wear as she is of wearing them

Wish me luck babes, I'm going in.... (might have to take a leaf out of your book Dancer and do a bit of retail therapy later. Not that anything will fit, grumble, mumble)

hope I really enjoy your posts. Good luck for today, sounds like an ordeal to be honest, probably a good job you are getting it all done on Monday then the rest of half term can be used to get use to the idea of the new glasses!

obrigada well done on day 9! Watching the film through is so useful.

anne sorry to hear you had a rough weekend. I am also struggling with fit February, am doing more regular exercise but am also eating too much. Hopefully some toning is happening under my fat suit too! (Thanks for that image hope )

faire thanks for the encouragement. This learning curve can go round in loops sometimes!

Spanna how are you doing babe?

Im hi

I can honestly say that waking up this morning, I had NO regrets about NOT drinking last night. Think I may try it again tonight.

Love to you all xxx