DH's ' sexting' made me chuckle

[stranger111]

Firstly NC for this, pombears, sweetcorn rivers, centre parks oxo tower fun etc.

DH has been away with work for a few weeks now , signal isn't fantasic in the remote area they are in so without going into TMI I received one text from DH that said on the subject of a blowjob he can't wait for me to taste him again. TMI ? I know

I just burst out laughing , bless his socks does he not notice the stick it past your taste bud methods or the massive swig of wine taken afterwards . Don't get me wrong it's not like he lives of a diet of beer and garlic, but I don't like the taste... who does ?

Men huh

This is light-hearted by the way.

[WallyBantersJunkBox]

The German for Buttermilk is Dickmilch....

[TheCrumpetQueen]

The consistency is horrible, like snot or phlegm. That's what puts me off, still do it though

[UnicornsNotRiddenByGrownUps]

Just don't let it get to that point... Once he's had a bit of fun just go for full on sex. You both benefit that way and there isn't any spitting or swallowing or funny tastes going on beyond the taste of penis!

[swannylovesu]

it smells like bleach! i often wonder when cleaning the loo if the inventor of domestos noticed this.....

Couldn't comment on taste, i'm a wuss and terrified i'd vomit

[TheCrumpetQueen]

It is bleachy!

[cantheyseeme]

Its not the taste i oppose, its the texture, it reminds me of egg white, i cant handle it!

[iklFaceOfBooe]

'Taste of Penis' sounds like a grim fragrance by Lentheric

[gamerchick]

You don't have to swallow yanno!

[Casmama]

The trick is either to stop before they cum or to have them quite far in your mouth so it goes down your throat with as little contact with your tongue as possible.

[Nora2012]

There are "masque strips" you can get which you put in your tongue to cover the flavour? (Not sure if that's the right word!) but worth a try if he's had curry/garlic etc. cum in a variety of flavours, not sure if that's their actual tag line, but it should be.

[cantheyseeme]

once its in your mouth tho you may aswell swallow, spittings a filthy habit

[gamerchick]

Who says it's got to go in your mouth anyway? Honestly it's not compulsory

[Lorelilee]

Sorry, can't help but think of Dec's quote from last night 'penisy burps' :D

[KouignAmann]

I never used to enjoy swallowing but my DP of two years has a sweet tooth and eats lots of cake and buns. It tastes sweet and delicious and he gets a lot more BJs as a result.
Did I really post that on an internet forum?

[Twattergy]

There is a small tree that when it flowers in spring really smells of spunk. I pointed this out to my ex partner once and he agreed. We called them spunk trees. Really potent.

[BerstieSpotts]

Yep, it's definitely the texture which is the problem. Although the taste is bleurgh and it burns my mouth/throat which would be my excuse if I needed one, luckily DP is the perfect gentleman and has never insisted He did once do it by accident and it wasn't too bad. I haven't been brave enough to offer since, though!

[NoArmaniNoPunani]

The smell of it fresh is much better than the smell when it's been festering up your fanny for the night

[UnicornsNotRiddenByGrownUps]

hahahahah NoArmani hahahha oh dear god

Did YOU just post that on an internet forum?

KouignAmann you are absolved....

[BerstieSpotts]

I can't say I've ever experienced that particular smell!

[FracturedViewOfLife]

It can taste like sake....

[DaisyBD]

Twattergy it's linden trees.

[munkysea]

The act is fantastic, the texture, taste, look and fact it shoots out? MAKES ME WANT TO VOM EVERY TIME. I just can't even.

[HippyTea]

I'm pissing myself laughing at this thread. I think this should be added to the list of things to read to help with depression.

NoArmani bahahahha

[Saturdaysunshine123]

embarassed despite the anoymity

I highly recommend using coconut oil as a lube. It makes everything ahemtaste a bit like a Bounty bar

[YouAreMyRain]

After 16 yrs with my ex, who's spunk tasted really strong and bitter, I was delighted to discover that my new DPs man fat is actually quite palatable and pleasant tasting. He is vegetarian, maybe that helps?