The dating thread 65

[Queenofthedrivensnow]

Can I make a little confession? It made me a little teary too!

I thought I'd 'twatproofed' my profile and that most of the men I meet are, essentially, decent men - we just haven't really clicked...

I do a fair few hobbies and interests, I get out to places and I do stuff. And yet I don't meet men. And the ones I do meet aren't interested.

Just to clarify, it was knowing exactly how that sigh felt that did it for me.

Might look a bit odd otherwise!

I don't think I want too much...

I want someone to camp out under the stars with.
I want someone to lie in bed and drink wine whilst we watch dodgy horror films by candlelight with.
I want someone I can sing crappy love songs with my guitar to.
I want someone I feel completely at ease being myself with.
I want someone who thinks I'm amazing because I want to do the above.

I'm beginning to think that person doesn't exist.

Just in case it would make anyone feel better to have a good old feeling sorry for yourself weep. Works for me

Bob Dylan singing Make You Feel My Love

Goodness how maudlin are we all today!! I'm trying to control my urge to text housemate guy and wait for him to get in touch with me about tonight....must not text....must not text....putting a plan B in place for if he does have to work late....

Here's a (slightly) more positive thing to read and consider that was sent to me the other day. Some food for thought.

www.marcandangel.com/2012/06/13/15-relationship-truths-for-tough-times/

I especially like no.s 10 & 14

Chins up dating thread!

ahem I am crap at links

Thanks oneday.

I was actually feeling v positive - amazing date and amazing sex with geeky guy. But - no date arranged yet and no text today - so I feel very vulnerable. I very much like him. He did say he'd had an amazing time. I don't like feeling so vulnerable though.

I feel the vulnerability thing dontcallme. Exactly the same here right now.

So housemate guy just got in touch....he's not working that late tonight (I find it an acceptable time, in fact it's the time I would normally finish on a work day) but thinks he'll be rubbish company anyway so are we still on for Saturday. Hmm. Well obviously we are but I feel like I would really like to see him tonight. He seemed really very into me last time we were together....yes lots of looks, cuddles/touching/hugs/snogs, just very comfortable in each others company and I love the chemistry and sparks etc...he has told me he thinks I'm beautiful on more than one occasion and like I said nice phone conversations sunday and monday nights but I haven't been in touch with him since then as I don't want to be the one that instigates each contact. (sunday was following texts from him....monday night i started i think).

I just replied saying that it would be a normal time for me, and I doubt he would ever be rubbish company, but it's cool if he's not up for hanging out tonight and yes for Saturday. I feel a bit though.

Folk - you've made me all teary again - I think we are looking for each other!! I just relate to everything you've said so much - there has got to be someone out there who is right for us, we are not asking for anything unreasonable. Although Johnny Depp looks would be very nice.

OneDay - thank you I will check the link out. Do not text - post here instead if you get the urge!

Dont - Being vulnerable goes hand in hand with successful dating, you have to let someone in or it just won't work. Keeping everything crossed for you that he's one of the good ones.

Supposed to be working from home today but it's not going so well! I've been to the gym and subsequently eaten my body weight in kitkats, oops.

super

OneDay sorry for being maudlin!

Awww we all sound down in the dumps today.

Oneday try not to worry if u spoke to him Monday it's only Wednesday isn't it?

I like number 14 in that link too

Dontcallme I'm sure everything fine with geeky, perhaps he's busy. They say that men need to pull away I order to spring back. That's probably what's happening for you and Oneday.

I'm still texting with Donny and agreed to go on a second date with him hoping he 'grows' on me. The one thing that annoys me if I haven't text in awhile he sends me a text saying 'Boo!' Find it very irritating

Oh I'm so fed up. They all seem to be ugly :(

Stupidhead

Haha we all get a bit wallowy sometimes just as long as we are all here to prop each other up rather than drag each other down!!!

Hormonal sounds like he thinks he's being cute...you may have to nip that in the bud if you find it otherwise!! (I text that to a particular friend occasionally....he always responds saying ' ''Aaargh!!'' oh no, wait, FUCK OFF' as he knows I know it annoys him). It's like the text equivalent of childishly poking someone for attention isn't it.

super it sounds like you DO have this dating malarkey right because as soon as you've realised that there is an issue then you are doing something proactive about it. You never know he might man up and realise that he's losing something great.....or he may not, but then you'd be well rid anyway as he clearly would not be a long term prospect.

On an ego-boosting note I also just received a hey-whats-up text from an on-off fling, referring to me as 'hot'. I had decided a few months ago that we were permanently off, he didn't seem to notice for a while but then went quiet about 6 weeks ago. It doesn't mean anything to me now to hear from him, apart from make me feel a bit smug that I popped into his thoughts in a kinda way.

Stupid - are you on POF? So many ugly men, particularly depressing when they get in touch!

Hormonal - that would bug me too! Go down the toddler parenting route, ignore the bad behaviour and reward the good! Ignore his 'boo' texts and reply to the interesting ones.

Oneday - Thank you. I'm letting this one go, it's only going to cause more days of feeling in limbo and wondering if he cares or not. I'm going to save the energy for someone more worthy! But only after I've spent today wallowing, eating too much and come this eve probably drinking too much! And I'm glad you received that text, always nice to know someone's missing how hot you are

God, I am desperately trying not to text geeky. I hope he's not had second thoughts about me :(

dontcallme, stay strong!! I'm glad we have this thread here to help curb texty impluses.

It sounds unlikely that he'd be having second thoughts. I am worrying the same though I understand! I guess it is a very good sign that we clearly care so much though. Now just have to stay on top of the temptation to turn slightly crazy!

Stop stressing Dontcallme! I reckon it's because he probably feels quite secure you like him and thinks you are the same!

That is the problem though Oneday we yearn to meet someone we really fancy but when we do we stress they don't feel same. God it's hard work!

Haha, I might start hanging out at Sainsbury's!

Just popped in with my daughter after the school run and there was a really nice looking man a couple of tills away. I was gazing at him when he turned round and smiled at me. SMILED!! I think I just blushed and looked away.

Anyway, then he walked past me a couple of times and looked over and smiled again.

I mean, I didn't talk to him, I don't know him, I've never seen him before so I doubt I'll ever see him again... but I had no make up on, my hair was looking wild and windy, I was just wearing jeans, a jumper and my big M&S autumn coat. But clearly he saw something that he liked.

So maybe he won't be the only one!

I'm feeling hopeful again...

I'm so not secure and I think I'm falling for him and it makes me feel a bit sick. I will heed all your advice and stay strong!

It's nice when that happens Folkgirl gives u a confidence boost especially when u don't look your best. I used to get eyed up far more by men when with exh

Well to be honest, I think it's probably very many years since it's happened Hormonal

No one ever fancies me!

But what was interesting is that my friend and her husband said I usually give out "don't even think about it vibes". I don't think I do, but they've both said it.

Perhaps I'm giving out fewer of those vibes now.

Go Folkgirl!