The Dating Thread 64

[unBant]

Here we go again...

The pics on my mn profile are some of the ones I use. Ex says I attract players because I look like a bimbo! Nice of him! I am intelligent and try to show that on my profile. Or maybe there are just lots of players on online dating?

Dontcallme why don't you try messaging first-then you're taking some control over the process?

OneDay I tend to 'favourite' people (POF) rather than send the first message. Its giving them a hint, so its up to them to take it or not.

don'tcall why not get someone with a more balanced view than your ex to cast an eye over your profile?

Hello everyone, may I join you? I'm a divorcee with 2 kids and dating sucks! It feels like no-one seems to want to date any more, they all seem too scared. What's EA that you all keep referring to, may I ask?

Yes, I think my ex might not want me to date again. Well the pics are the ones on my MN profile, so I don't think they're too bad.

Thinking about it, I did get to date three with one guy - who turned out to want to send pictures of his genitals and wanted a FWB situation, so I binned him. Another one I ditched after date 2. The third, I really liked, but he suggested after date 2 that we lived too far apart, but he still wanted to visit me this weekend for sex. I ditched him.

I think a sample of three is too small really. I think I just need to carry on.

I do message back, I just like them to show the initial interest first.

don'tcall just had a look at your photos on your MN profile. You look gorgeous - think your ex might have his own reasons for rubbishing them

anon it usually means emotional affair or emotional abuse, depending on the context.

Yeah, dating can suck. I'm feeling down today but not sure why. Date with music man was good, he asked me to go out again last night but i'd already made plans so turned him down but he was cool. Spoke on the phone today, so it's not dating blues - just feeling like I want to cry but I can't .

Thanks Pauline. Ex says I look too 'available' - he thinks I should be two stone heavier with no make up and frumpy clothes like when I was with him. He says I'll attract the wrong type.

Dating can be depressing, I know that feeling!

It is really hard and can be so very depressing but I just keep thinking well, it's a positive move that's making it more likely I'll meet someone in the end, and that can only be a good thing!

I had a really good first date with a very nice bloke last night, he's been in touch today and mentioned meeting up again during the date so all good signs - but I've just logged in to the site we met on and his pictures are deleted off his profile?

Would this get alarm bells ringing if it was you? Something to hide?

Yes, I think it's not a good sign if they delete their picture and I stop all contact when that happens.

Why it could just mean that they don't like their pictures and want to update it probably why I'm still single tho as I am naive.

I have my first date with Mr Gemini on Wednesday, we've been messaging quite a lot over the last two weeks and this is the first time we've both been able to meet so i'm very excited about it as we seem to be getting on very well.

Just hope there is that elusive 'spark'

He could have deleted his pictures because he wants to focus on getting to know you without having to deal with any other interest. But equally he could have deleted them because he is hiding from a partner. Have you messaged him to ask him why? Have you heard from him since? I'd just keep an open mind and look out for red flags, as with all dates.

I don't think someone deleting their pictures after a promising date is necessarily a bad sign - maybe he only has pictures up when he is looking for a new person to date, and only likes one at a time? I'd ask him why they are gone and see how quick his response is!

I'm of the school of thought that if they delete pics they're hiding something/don't want to get caught by a partner, and he's not likely to admit that.

I'll ask him now and report back, thanks for the input...

Roller - I agree that removing pics is not necessarily a bad thing, could mean he is focusing on you! Ask him about it. The guy I am dating never had pics on his profile, he's a policeman and didn't want his colleagues or convicts to find him. Luckily for me he turned out to be super hot!

I've been dating the detective for a month now, all seems to be going well. He works a lot but I see him 2 - 3 times a week which feels just right. We've also been having the most amazing, ahem, bedroom antics which I'm thoroughly enjoying!

I'm scared to let my guard down with him though in case he hurts me. I pick the most awful boyfriends generally, don't trust my judgement anymore!

Hormonal - good luck - hope you find that spark!

sooperdooper - sounds like it's going well with the detective. I'm going to keep going in the hope that I'll meet someone nice soon. A 22 year old on POF wants to be my toyboy! Told him he was too young...

Sooperdooper - am guessing the spark was there with the detective?

I've been on about 25 dates in the two years I've been OD and think I fancied one who turned out to be a MM

There's been a few I've liked but not worked out for one reason or another but mostly guys I just didn't want to see again ??

MM, hormonal?

Is od rife with married men? I've only chatted to one so far I thought was a possible mm....

Roller I think the photo deletion is a bit weird. Sets my spidey senses off. Last time I went on a date I took screen shots of the profile pic in case anything dodgy happened and he just disappeared from the site.
IMO any tinkering with a profile after a promising date can't be a good sign but that's just me

If anyone wouldn't mind looking at my profile to see if I'm doing the right thing I'd appreciate it. It's a bit quirky - but I'm a bit quirky too.

yes od def rife with mm

Evening all :) so, it would seem whatsapp man is definitely the real deal. He showed me the whatsapp messages he sent me (dates and all visible) and it looks like I completely blanked him. It's weird because it's definitely my number (my photo was on the whatsapp page) but I did not receive those messages. We had a really relaxed lovely time. He's not my type really but I think it's good I don't go off my usual type. He's kind and really sweet. I like him. I think we will see each other again.

Anonymous - MM is married man