The Dating Thread 64

[unBant]

Here we go again...

Poff If he genuinely is on the pull again would he not have taken this opportunity to just come clean? It would be pretty easy for him to do, I instigated the texting so he would have been able to just text his pfo and that would be that.

Sorry to be blunt, he is keeping you sweet so you are one of his options. That's why he disappears and comes back.
From his point of view why burn the bridge when he can keep you sweet.

On the other hand, how many bloody threads are there on mn about people who swear blind it is all a misunderstanding and try desperately to convince the poor misfortunate mug that they're the only one

Just listen to yourself.

Arsenal I hear what you're saying about being one of his options... Do you mean he keeps disappearing and coming back to pof?

Broken... I did suggest a while back that we should just stick with seeing eachother for fun when we can ( this is when I knew he was on pof) but he insisted no... I'm not sure I would have wanted this back then even, was sort of calling his bluff to see would he go for it...
The more points of view I see from everyone here the more I'm realising he is probably having his cake and eating it too... There's no doubt that sexually our relationship is pretty damn good, maybe that's enough reason for him to string me along for another while by telling me what I want to hear... He's a bloody good actor though if that's the case, has it down to a tee.
I would most definitely not be on for anything other than an exclusive relationship now though, no way.

Poffed......I'd let him stew......say you need time to consider in light of recent findings and stay out of contact for a few days. Monitor the profile......

So update from me; Dimples turned down dinner tomorrow (working late) and 3rd date is set for mon; in some ways he seems keen, in others not so sure, I could really like him....I find the whole thing quite nerve-wracking/intimidating though. Dates have been great, but in between msgs are mostly practicalities about next date.
On the other hand....housemate guy....seeing him on Friday (group night out), I feel much more relaxed about, excited to see him, happy texting this evening.

I see a bit of a pickle developing here

I see that could well be what's happening here too although I don't think I've had as much fun as I've been having up until today in a very long time...not only sexually though, in every way... We've very similar tastes in practically everything, really enjoy spending time with eachother and do so whenever we can... Such a pity he had to fuck it all up.
Gonna sleep on it and see if things are any clearer tomorrow... thanks so much everyone for all your wise words...

Ham.. how was it???

Sorry Oneday I didn't see your post so was replying to broken... Great that you have the distraction of housemate guy to keep you from stressing too much about dimples...

Pof guy has deleted his profile btw, ive already stopped the texting, usually it goes on until bedtime and always say goodnight to eachother, not tonight though.. really feel uneasy and unsettled now so it's not looking good...
Onwards and upwards eh?

Pof meant disappearing and then coming back to you.

Hi all, I forgot the loo update I was busy eating sushi and drinking wine. Date two was lovely we get in so well but no kiss and or any contact at all. He's dead keen to date again - maybe he's a slow burner. I am v attracted to him

Poff your man is a chancer and keeping you on the back burner

Please help dating thread. Pudsey guy been very chatty texting and ringing me loads we've not met yet (having coffee date Saturday) but I really get on well with him. We friends on FB too.

Last night he had his kids to stay so I understand he busy and not gonna message me but I noticed he was on pof all night! He did send me a couple of texts saying he'd message later but I told him I was going to sleep at 10.00.

Just a bit fed up he found time to vits pof all night

Maybe he was just logged in? Got to remember if you know he was online then he'll know you were too!

Got to say though I've been chatting to one guy and not sure I fancy him but we have a lot in common and he's always 'online', could be a phone app setting maybe?

Ham that sounds lovely... I don't necessarily think no kiss on the second date is a bad sign, was there much opportunity for contact after the meal?

Arsenal there hasn't actually been any disappearing from him, it's all been very consistent. We live quite a distance from eachother and 90 percent of the time he travels to me... I was up in his hometown this weekend, met some of his friends and generally had a lovely time...

I suppose none of that really matters though seeing as I woke up this morning feeling the same as I did last night, like a bit of a mug.
I'm wondering now if I should meet him tomorrow or not?

Thanks stupidhead, yes I wondered that too maybe he just stays logged in even tho he might not be on all time. He a very good hands on dad by what he says n it's one of the things I really like about him too.

So do u think you'd go on a date with him?

Poffed if you have met all his friends then I'd say he thinks a lot about you. I'd just go and try and suss out his body language and see what's said

Stupidhead, that could easily be the answer... I've often left myself logged in on my phone without realising... Having said that I know it feels shitty when you think he's too busy chatting with others to message you... Are your messages short and sweet generally? I'm only asking because after messaging eachother all day sometimes it becomes a bit of an effort to think of what to say if the other person is expecting a long, informative, sexy message!

Morning

Ham sounds good so far. The kiss will come. Might just be taking it slowly and be a little nervous.

Poffedoff just take your time to figure it out. I'd be a tad more distant and see if he puts the effort in.

Oneday no harm in dating two guys. See who makes you happiest.

Broken seems that guy really did a number on you. You sound so down in all your posts. It just takes a little time to get over things. What an ass to say you were great in bed while breaking up. You are better off without him, he doesn't sound all the great going by your previous posts.

Hormonal being honest I would still be online if I had a date arranged with someone and hadn't met them yet. Don't think that is something that needs to be worried about so early on. Just see how you feel after the date.

Stupid people do say they appear online when not but that could be absolute crap. Who knows.

Anyhoo I changed pic on pof last night and got a good few new guys getting onto me. Have a date lined up next Tuesday. I can't be arsed doing the chatting for weeks thing. Like to meet people quickly enough to see if I fancy them. Guy seems nice, gets my slightly weird sense of humour from my profile (most guys miss it) and is up my street looks wise.

Last boy I was seeing mailed saying pic looked great and blah blah blah. Usual bs. He has been trying to see me for coffee for the last two weeks but I'm not interested really. Things ended as he didn't want anymore kids and I want to keep my options open (I don't have any). Don't see how things could have changed in the mean time. Had a lot of good times with him and sex was great. Could be tempted for fwb. Great chemistry but I want nothing else from him, so it might work. We shall see.

Sorry hormonal, that reply was more aimed at you!

I thought the same about the friend meeting, wasn't all of them and wasn't arranged or anything, just happened to bump into a few during the evening.

We're just messaging on the site and they're really short and sweet, he hasn't once complimented me though! Other than being a fellow weirdo. I dunno, I don't fancy him. Don't think I do. The solicitor guy is nice but I may be a bit 'out there' for him, there's an unemployed musician but he looks like my ex :-/ and all the rest are bald or shaved bald. My ex is coming around tomorrow but I don't think he's changed his mind so in that case my next free night is Wednesday and I'm definitely going to go out with one of them!

Powpow how long were you seeing the last guy before you split? The FWB thing sounds good if you're confident you won't develop feelings for him...

Stupidhead I think it's waay to early to worry about weirdos online activity, could be he's logged in accidentally or could be he's chatting a lot... see how it progresses..
I must have missed the post about your ex... Changed his mind about what?

Poffedoff I thought he'd say that. The only way it can be true is if he fundamentally misunderstandings online dating sites. It's simply not necessary to update the "looking for" part of your profile, unless he thinks it's a legally binding document.

Oh poffed, he dumped me and he's calling around tomorrow but I know he hasn't changed his mind about 'us'.

I'm not worried about weirdos online behaviour, it's a bit of a relief! The solicitor one is odd, he seems lovely and removes his picture when he's not online..that could be a good thing! But I'm not jumping straight into anything, just honesty is all.

Oh and for what it's worth, in my online dating history of two mini relationships (about 2/3 months) and a long term (3 year) we both mutually agreed to remove profiles after the second date - they'd bring it up first.

Poffedoff was only seeing him for about two months. I'm confident enough that I won't develop feelings. I did like him when seeing him but those feelings disappeared after the kids chat. He's not the guy for me. Am quite good at detaching and keeping emotions out of things like that. Might meet him for coffee and run it by him. I know I'd want to date other people as at the end of the day I would like to meet someone for a relationship. The fwb would end the second I met someone I like. Am I stupid to consider this? Bed is a little lonely these days

Thanks powpow and Poffed. Online dating sucks

He's messaged me this morning so I guess I'm worrying over nothing , just met so many creeps of late