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Original poster

Bloody H looking at porn on pc

158 replies

wotafarce · 03/10/2013 20:30

Am so mad; he knows I don't approve. I know he uses it, he has done for years but he always makes sure the history is deleted.

Just found some that he's looked at today and it was she-male stuff FFS amongst 'normal' porn. Usually it's 'asian babes'.
Wtf is that all about?

He's very techy and there's nothing in the folders on the pc (that I can see). Nothing on the history or temp internet files either, yet this stuff is on the recently changed files of both his & MY profile (which is how I found it when looking for one of my docs).

I feel like printing the stuff and posting it to everyone who thinks he's a nice chap. Fatheaded Twat that he his.

OP posts:
Original poster
wotafarce · 04/10/2013 16:58

HerdyHerdwick - you are right, there's a raft of issues; most I cope with but the porn really, really makes me angry.
He is financially abusive, pays for everything except food but I have no say in how the finances are dealt with. House in his name, (he had it when we got together) insists we continue to live here even though I'd like to move.
He is lazy, won't do 'his' chores. I run the house but don't have much left over after food bought to spend.
House /holidays don't happen unless he approves. I've spent the last 20 yrs putting up with this 'cause I can't face 'Told you so'.

OP posts:
Original poster
wotafarce · 04/10/2013 17:07

Also, he has a hobby which he's totally absorbed in which I'm supposed to just tolerate - our whole life is dictated by this bloody hobby (which he took up after we married). It literally consumes his every waking hour.

Think that's it - sorry for the rant.

OP posts:
Original poster
wotafarce · 04/10/2013 17:09

Oh, and once he took a photo on his phone of some random woman's arse, cheeky fucker.

OP posts:
joblot · 04/10/2013 17:27

It sounds as if you don't like him much. Which isn't that surprising

zatyaballerina · 04/10/2013 17:35

I think you have bigger problems than his watching porn. When you have problem after problem with someone, it only takes one more small wrong to blow your fuse. It's not really the porn, it's the fact he doesn't share your values, doesn't respect you as you wish he would, is controlling, domineering and forces your life to revolve around him and his interests.

Original poster
wotafarce · 04/10/2013 18:21

joblot & zatyaballerina - you are both so right.

OP posts:
IslandMoose · 04/10/2013 18:22

Leave him - it will be doing both of you a favour.

contortionist · 04/10/2013 18:34

If he's making you miserable, you can leave him. You don't need to manufacture rows over porn to justify it.

comingalongnicely · 04/10/2013 18:37

I don't think the porn is the issue & you know it.

You need to sort your attitudes to each other out & find out if you even have a relationship under all the animosity before you worry about what wanking material he chooses to use.

Good Luck anyway.

FoxyHarlow123 · 04/10/2013 18:48

Wotafarce - Lol, good on you for the fuck off. I admire your spirit!

Original poster
wotafarce · 04/10/2013 19:12

Gee Thanks Foxy Hmm

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 04/10/2013 19:17

He's blamed you for his dodgy porn use ?

That is out of order.

AnyFucker · 04/10/2013 19:20

wot who is going to say "I told you so" if you bail on this dickhead ?

and does it matter, really ?

they don't have to live with it

one life...yeah ? Is this how you want to live it ?

eurochick · 04/10/2013 19:27

I don't understand the anger I see on here about this issue. It's just pictures/videos of bits and fucking. Not the antichrist. But as it is for you, and there seem to be some other issues, enjoy your confrontation. Your relationship really doesn't seem very healthy and pleasant for either of you. I think there is more at play here than just some internet porn.

Original poster
wotafarce · 04/10/2013 19:53

I have kids doing A levels so don't want the fall-out & as he's Mr Lovely Laid Back & I'm the disciplinarian, they'll choose to stay with him rather than me.

I guess in a few years they'll have gone to uni & so will I.

OP posts:
comingalongnicely · 04/10/2013 22:44

Well, don't know about him, but you're not coming across as having a bundle of laughs. Can't honestly see why you're staying if you're that angry. Surely it'd be better all round if you went your own ways?

As a stop gap how about creating different passworded profiles for you all on the laptop - that way the kids, or you, won't see any sites he's visited.

LaQueenForADay · 04/10/2013 23:06

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LordElpuss · 05/10/2013 05:52

How can any woman be "meh" about porn Hmm

Vivacia · 05/10/2013 07:22

How can any person be 'meh' about porn?

LordElpuss · 05/10/2013 07:50

Fair point, Vivacia.

comingalongnicely · 05/10/2013 08:11

Sorry, I'm 'meh' about porn. it's there to perform a function and it does...

Original poster
wotafarce · 05/10/2013 09:19

I wonder what would happen if there was no porn; would people explode because they had no outlet for their desire???

Hmmm, I wonder...

OP posts:
LordElpuss · 05/10/2013 09:32

and what about the women (and men) who are there to "perform a function" - often against their free will?

And the negative influence it has on young people? Meh about that too?

LaQueenForADay · 05/10/2013 09:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Grennie · 05/10/2013 09:39

There are a lot of issues in your relationship.
He is financially abusive.
He expects you and your DC;s to revolve around his hobby
He watches porn AND leaves it on the PC were DCs could find it
He doesn't respect your views.
He is lazy and doesn't do many chores

Personally the porn use would be enough of a deal breaker for me.