Who's going to start dating thread No57?

[akaWisey]

Or am I going to be 'one'

ok well now I've mailed MarriedGirl (shouldn't really give her a Dating Name as it's purely platonic, I've made that very clear but she sounded so down that I couldn't ignore her). So there is :

Aruba (hungarian from OKC) who has said yes to the concept of a drink but I haven't set a time with yet.

DoctorLovely, met in person and emailed me, who I have to set up a drink with too.

And now CheshireCat has mailed me to ask if I'll be at this thing tomorrow night (which I was going to go to, but late after seeing World War Z) and she's looking forward to seeing me there. No communication from her in almost a week, and I'd resolved to not ask her out again because she seemed to need chasing and just wasn't that sparkling a personality. But so attractive...

All this when I'm away for a lot of the next fortnight, back in England.

I can feel my peacock feathers rustling away. Sorry.

They're positively flocking to you Bant

Hello lovely Flipper and Lubes and Dolly .

Hello everyone else, I hope your secret mounds are hale and hearty.

Juliette you have your head screwed on and know exactly what you're doing, I hope he's well aware of how fortunate he is that you're giving him the time of day.

Work is horrendous today, not fair when I should be lounging on a chaise longue with George Clooney bringing me raspberry daiquiris (and the rest)

Make mine a strawberry one Nora

Well, off out tonight with College Bloke. He is a nice man, funny, lots in common, but I am feeling a little bit lacklustre about it. We shall see, like I always say you never know and he could be an absolute star.

OWW is this a first meeting? I won't say date.

at secret mound.

Bant, tread carefully.

Juliette, what do you think you will do? I would say see him for a date night then it will be less awkward if you think you cannot forgive. I don't know what happened and understand if you don't want to say. The problem I had this weekend wasn't a deal breaker, it was a silly lie designed to keep the peace but typical man it backfired spectacularly. Lots of grovelling and a big heart to heart yesterday has put things into perspective for me and knowing what a miserable so and so I was and the fact that he still doesn't want to lose what we have, I've decided to give the guy a break..... I think I would have ran like the wind with the boot on the other foot tbh.

Yep Scrazy this is the first meeting with College Bloke. Have second date with Alpha tomorrow though which I am looking forward to a lot

It will all become clear, I know.

Scazy it won't be awkward, I have no interest in a date at the moment and as Kin says he is lucky I'm even having a conversation. I know where my line is, if there is an attempt at excusing stuff then sadly it will be over.

Oh I see Juliette, hope it goes OK, whatever the outcome.

Kin please would you ask George to bring me vanilla ice cream, a strawberry daiquiri and a fat straw. I can then mix them

Dolly it's just a numbers game and first dates are just a meeting really. If you think about it how many of them were actually what you wanted.

Bant I've always wanted to call a man big boy. Just can't quite get it out with a straight face though

Scazy no refection at all on your situation, I'm glad it's worked out for you

Sorry to be so rude and barge into the thread like this! But are these red flags for potential mind fuckery? I attract them like anything so just want to confirm to myself that I've made the right decision to cut contact with this one.

Texts me and says "I'm all yours now, lets chat" and then when I reply, he doesn't respond for three hours.

Doesn't text me for a couple of days so I don't bother either and then when he does says "you've been a bit quiet!" even though he hasn't texted me either.

If I tell him about something relevant to my life, he talks negatively about it. It sounds silly but prams on buses. I mentioned I'd had a faff getting dd on the bus, he rants about hating prams on buses. I mention that my brother loves cycling, he hates cyclists. And so on.

It sounds trivial but I'm not being daft in recognising someone who will mess with my head am I?

Juliette I'll put the order in and it'll be ready by the time I get out of the chippy

shamy
He sounds like a knob

Thanks Juliette, I talked to RL friends and the general consensus was 'that's how their (mens) minds work' rather than a dumping offense. Will be on my guard though.

Amy, he obviously isn't right for you. He's annoying you already.

Thanks for confirming I'm not being silly :) its hard work this online dating lark. I miss the natural meeting someone at work (or way back when, college/uni).

Amy your senses are working just fine. I had one of these once, we'd not even met and he insisted on calling to talk at me, said my areas of professional expertise was all bullshit (when he finally asked), then told me to book a restaurant without asking. Knobber.

Kin ta! (haven't said that for years)

Amy welcome too, you are not barging in. Everyone is welcome and we have recently had lots of new posters too.

You love it, Bant.

Amy, welcome, and well done for spotting the flags in time.

Nora, I didn't want to ask before, what with being on leave for a few days and not wanting to rub your nose in it, but could you just send George home when you're done with him? He needs to plump my pillows before bedtime.

He'll be very tired Flipper ...

Hello Amy - yep, agree with the consensus, sounds like a Grade A tosspot - the kind of twonk I married.

Juliette I managed to slide still further down the social scale - just had a row with a pissed-up Geordie in the chippy,

Thanks everyone :) its taken some learning but I think my red flag radar is finally getting there

hi all! er, I have a question:
Went on a date with chap on Sun. had a really nice time and definitely want to see him again. as we left he said to 'keep in touch' and when I said I would he said that maybe we could meet up again. I though 'yaaay!' through to second date !
I emailed him last night to say thanks for a lovely evening, and gave abit of chit-chat about my day. But I DIDN'T specifically say about meeting up again, as I thought it was already clear that I wanted to! Now I see that he has read the email, but not responded.
Should I have been more specific re a second date? I just don't know what the etiquette is in these situations!
any ideas, girls and boys?

Kin excellent. I do like a good street row. Extra points for it being in the chippy and if you're language caused anyone to say "ooh, charming!" give yourself a badge I

Stop I have always found that if a man does want a second date they will come out and ask for it. This has been true even of the wimpiest, most shy types.

That said he hasn't actually responded yet and it's too soon to say he's ignoring it. So while he may be a wimp and just ignore it, it's also likely that he read it on his phone etc while he was busy and is planning to respond and suggest something later.

In terms of etiquette, based on the above I tend to wait for a second date text, which etiquette seems to say follows the next day or on the journey home but that's a big no-no in my book. In the interests of not being a Rules girl, I have asked out people for second dates who I got on well with and haven't followed up themselves. It's never worked, but I'd rather do it then not.

your

Thanks, stranger. hmm, I think I'll probably leave it till tomorrow night and if I haven't heard from him by then I will explicitly suggest a second date and see what he says. like you, i'd like to know one way or the other. he did seem keen, though. lots of smiles / eye contact, seeming and chatty etc...