The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Posters, Lurkers, Old Or New, Come Take A Seat, This Bus Is For YOU!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

A huge big welcome to the Brave Babes threads.

We're a varied group of posters, on this wonderfully supportive, non judgemental, gigantic Bus, and we are all heading in the same direction - towards Sobriety.

Some of us don't touch a drop of alcohol, some of us do. Some of us drink too much, openly admit it and are desperate to stop and some of us are trying to manage controlled drinking.

No matter what we're doing, we're just trying to do it One Day At A Time.

What ever you need, what ever your habit, chances are that there'll be another poster who is just like you or has been where you are now, already here, waiting to talk or just listen :)

Yes, some of us have been here for a longer time than others, some of us for just a few days but that's what makes this Bus so great imo, the variety of knowledge and understanding :)

This Bus has been whizzing along various roads now for almost four years thanks to the very desperate cry for help from THIS THREAD BY JWN

And if you'd like to read some of the other threads, maybe how we got to where we are today, then you can follow them back using the links RIGHT HERE

Hope to see you soon :)

That's lovely, you must be really proud of them.

My sons play Sunday football and that is agonising enough!

Welcome socand well done for being brave and making the first step in posting here!

lonnika my DD has a gift for singing and last year she entered a talent show. I was so nervous about it! But she was 10 years old, and much more nervous than me - and she got through it without alcohol! You wouldn't suggest to a child that he or she had a drink to cope, would you? So if they can do it - so can you. And you will set a good example in how to handle stress to your kids.

Hi guys. Just checking in as I haven't been on in a while. Was drinking rather a lot over the weekend, but not for the last two nights. I just feel miserable and low at the moment and I don't know how to snap myself out of it. After two weeks of feeling great, it's quite a shock to feel so bad again. Anyway. I'll just keep trundling on.

Hope you all have good days and welcome to the newbies!

LOL. - Alias. True !! Well done to your daughter :)
I am waaaaaayyyyy more nervous than them lol !

There are lots of reasons (excuse) that I have used when they are competing regarding drink. I Used to 'joke' that their sport would turn me into an alcoholic (hilarious ! Not !)
I will come on here and post (or vent) on Saturday night instead :)

That's a good idea, come on here and post. Actually I admit I did drink on the night of the talent show, but I waited til half-way through the evening, after her slot.

I keep thinking kids have to do stuff that is just as stressful (to them) as we have to as adults - bullying and cliques and bloody SATS - and we could all learn to cope better

Hi All
Thanks for all the welcomes.
Just went out for dinner with a friend. Had one glass of wine and a HUGE meal which seems to have helped kill my appetite for more wine.
I think for me, eating helps.
Week-ends are always difficult, but I really want to cut down/cut out.

Sorry your feeling so low theala. When you drank a lot over the weekend had you had a big break? I'm finding that now I'm having big spaces between drinking when I do I'm really low for days after. I always used to get bad, bad hangovers from binges. But now its not taking much as my tolerance is getting lower & lower. Hope you start to feel a but brighter. Could you go for a swim today? X

Hi all. Day three and feel a bit brighter:) need to get to day30 now:) I can but try. Making plans for weekend so I don't slip again x

alias I think kids get a lot of peer support and help from their parents. The ones that don't are more likely to turn to drink or drugs in adolescence I guess.

But, yes, they do seem to take it in their stride more easily. Less self conscious maybe? Also, in school they are being challenged all the time so perhaps less self critical of failure?

Theala it's ok to feel down. Sobriety does not mean eternal happiness. It's just one less thing to worry about

Hope things perk up for you again soon.

Agree Faire, that being sober is not instant boing & big happy faces. When I was drinking too much every weekend I felt hopeless, couldn't see the point of anything, just felt like I was going through the paces, getting older then death! Now that I am having big spaces between drinking, I've only drank 3 x this year I can see a future. I feel hopeful. I can make plans & think that'll be nice. The day to day with a teenager, toddler, crippling mortgage & childcare costs, a dh who works full time then is shattered is still bloody bloody hard work. Some days the monotony, the sheer exhaustion, the loneliness is so hard to take & these are the days that I really hear the wine witch. But I try to remind myself that to get back into that cycle will bring back the despair & hopelessness & I will lose the cracks of hope & light that sobriety has been opening up.
But life is hard. Having no money, constantly yet my dh works 7 days a week, I have a job that I trained 5 years at Uni for is depressing.
And then living in Scotland where its freezing does not help!

Thanks clutter and Faire. cluter Well, if by a 'big break', you mean 6 days AF, then yes. But also I had family over and had a great time with them, so obviously the week after is going to be a bit flat. On monday morning my stupidly-expensive mobile that DP bought me was stolen, and even though I know it's stupid, I'm still really pissed off about it. That phone was my most constant companion. And work is being a bit of a nightmare again. I don't want to go out, I don't want to do any exercise, I just want to sit on my couch, stuff my face and feel sorry for myself.

Bleh. Me, me, me. Sorry guys, I'll cop on to myself soon.

I'm signed off work with chest infection so you & me both sitting on couch stuffing faces. I'm just catching up with The Apprentice and enjoying the peace & quiet. The doctor said try to have a few days of rest. Ha with a teenager & toddler she would have to admit me somewhere for a few days! X

clutter it's great that you are feeling so much more positive about the future, despite the freezing Scottish weather!

I am getting very anxious about work tomorrow. Feeling quite panicky. Will go to boots later and see if I can get anything to help. Do Kalms work?

I've tried the CBT etc, it helped earlier in the week but now I am stressing again. I didn't drink my wine yesterday (I suppose that's an improvement - being able to have alcohol in the house and NOT drink it!) So could have that - but I know that only makes me feel better for a couple of hours, so not a long-term solution. Self-hypnosis only works while actually doing it - as soon as I stop (ie. to go to work!) the anxiety is straight back...

Big hello to everyone, not had time to catch up properly but will do later, hi to all the the newbies also. Day 11 here and feeling good, 2 slight negatives, more arguments with teenage dd and dh, I'm trying not to be a doormat anymore and they don't like it and secondly I have started getting up in the middle of the night to eat sweet things. I don't normally eat sweets and never wake up during the night but last night 2 weetabix, full fat milk and sugar then 2 slices of toast with butter and jam!!! This cannot go on, I'm so hungry, I'm supposed to be slimmer, boingier with dewy skin and swishy hair, I'm going to turn into an enormous weetabix biscuit, not swishy at all, catch up later x x x x

Hi Alias, I've found Kalms really helpful. I've used them many times as I'm a really anxious person. The best ones I've found are the ones where you take one at night. When I'm really anxious I lie awake worrying, then I worry that I'm going to be overtired then this causes more anxiety ad infinitum! Kalms has helped me get a good nights sleep so stop's this cycle, if I do wake through the night I can normally fall back asleep.
What is it that you are feeling anxious about exactly tomorrow? Have you had a break from work & this is first day back? 9 times out of 10 for me the thoughts of what I have to do are worse than actually doing it x

Joey I took St Johns Wort when I was doing exams, I know it's meant to be for depression but it worked on anxiety (for me) It was a long time ago but I assume it is still available.

Babyjane I did laugh at your weetabix comment. I'm sure the hunger will die down but your body will be looking to replace the lost calories/sugar. I did a long(ish) time AF earlier this year and hoped to end up really slim but it didn't happen, my appetite was increased for quite a while.

pink it has been pointed out previously our bodies craves the sugar fix the wine has provided for so long but I really want this to be a total I overhaul, I'm already a bit overweight and I'm keen to be fitter and healthier Inside and out but my hunger is insatiable, even my dog is looking at me funny as I eye up his wee meaty legs !!!!!!!

I'm overweight too Jane, could do with losing about 3 stone. I am so worried about my own health which is just one of the reasons I am desperate to knock the drink on the head properly....

My dad was an alcoholic and his eating habits were really weird at various times.

Hope you're not scaring your dog too much!

Not sure I can take St John's Wort with antidepressants, but I will look at the Kalms. Already take Melissa at night which does help sleep, but need something non-drowsy for daytime.

Yes that's it clutter back to work after a few days off. The last thing that happened on Friday was me leaving in a rush, not even saying goodbye to the boss. There's not much could happen really - but my moods seem to be so volatile that just a tiny thing could set it off & I overreact at slightest provocation.

babyj are you on steroids for the crohns? Those do funny things to your appetite. Is there much meat on your dog?!

Aw alias, really feel for you. At my old work I used to get so ridiculously anxious about things & I remember one of my colleagues, who was nearing 60 & worked there for nearly 30 years saying to me that really everyone is caught up in their own shit & not really paying that much attention to what you have done, have not done.
You can get non-drowsy Kalms for during the day too, have tried these & they helped too.
Good luck for good sleep tonight & hope tomorrow goes ok. Sure the key is not to worry & get yourself so wound up but this us much easier said than done x

Afternoon ALL, tis me, Mouse

Welcome to Soc and Pink, well done for posting, seeing it there in black and white as venus says makes it all the more real.

Joey - re St. John's or Rescue Remedy, anything like that and ADs, I would say NO to taking both unless you check with YOUR GP first as everyone is different.

I used to struggle terribly with sleep, or rather not sleeping when I first stopped drinking and was on Zopiclone for two weeks, reviewed after two weeks and given another two weeks and by then, managed to settle into a better routine. I too would take half at bedtime and half when I woke in the night, DH did Nemo duty whilst I got into a better sleep pattern.

When you go to Boots, ask the pharmacist but tell them what you're taking so that they can advise you on the Kalms front. Sorry you are struggling with the anxiety.

Clutter - sorry you are poorly

Baby - try and have little and often in terms of food to see if that stops the cravings to binge. Alcohol really does mess your body up! You need to listen to it though, if you are craving savoury stuff, your sodium levels might be low, especially if you've been having more sugar to cancel out the sugar in wine/alcohol.

It's hard really to find an equal balance because your appetite and food needs change through the month too!

Faire - I love this....... Sobriety does not mean eternal happiness. It's just one less thing to worry about Brilliant!

Ma - well done on the running, that's amazing. :)

Re weightloss/eating and cravings - did you read my post yesterday? Might help if you try to cut out sugar altogether? I have lost 4-5 lb in 6 days of no wine and no carbs/sugar - my theory is that replacing alcohol with sugar is just going to prolong the cravings for sugar/alcohol....