The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Posters, Lurkers, Old Or New, Come Take A Seat, This Bus Is For YOU!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

A huge big welcome to the Brave Babes threads.

We're a varied group of posters, on this wonderfully supportive, non judgemental, gigantic Bus, and we are all heading in the same direction - towards Sobriety.

Some of us don't touch a drop of alcohol, some of us do. Some of us drink too much, openly admit it and are desperate to stop and some of us are trying to manage controlled drinking.

No matter what we're doing, we're just trying to do it One Day At A Time.

What ever you need, what ever your habit, chances are that there'll be another poster who is just like you or has been where you are now, already here, waiting to talk or just listen :)

Yes, some of us have been here for a longer time than others, some of us for just a few days but that's what makes this Bus so great imo, the variety of knowledge and understanding :)

This Bus has been whizzing along various roads now for almost four years thanks to the very desperate cry for help from THIS THREAD BY JWN

And if you'd like to read some of the other threads, maybe how we got to where we are today, then you can follow them back using the links RIGHT HERE

Hope to see you soon :)

purple you honestly don't need to apologise - this is The Bus remember? We all know what you're going through.

And please don't call yourself a failure. That is just a label (and not a very accurate one) we all have faults - that doesn't make your whole person a 'failure'

Hello all

Yes yes to low carb diet.
Very important to keep up proteins and fats because the lack of these can cause sugar cravings / booze cravings.

I associate a lot of my food and booze issues with misadventures with vegetarianism and veganism, though I could not say which was cause and which was effect.

I am not eating properly at the moment.

Sorry to hear you are struggling, purple. nice to see you.

hello again clutter, hope you are better soon.

Thanks everyone for all the sympathy about my tiredness. I am like a baby: I need to fix my sleep and then I will have a better chance of eating properly. Tragic. I am 41.

Good luck all babes x

Busy bus!
curry glad you have had some success on the housing issue, that must be such a relief,
thurso my friend! How the devil are you?

Hello
I need to join this bus. So very bored and tired of my drinking. Yesterday a friend popped over and we had a couple of wines late afternoon. That doesn't bother me. It's civilised social drinking. I know she went home and had a cup of tea and supper. I, on the other hand, had another 3/4 bottle of wine for no reason at all. I had purposefully bought a bottle of wine for exactly that reason. No amount of 'self talk' could persuade me not to.
I am seeing a councellor, and she is fabulous, but I still manage to be persuaded by the voice in my head that I "need" to have more wine.
I just want to slow down my drinking, and stop thinking about it so much. It's so tiresome having to have this battle all the time.
So I would love to join in here and when this battle starts perhaps I should just post here instead...
I'm in Australia so I may post at odd times.

curryeater - sorry if I have missed this anywhere, but do you have medication for your sleep issues? When my insomnia was driving me nuts (11 years ago) my lovely doctor gave me a prescription for 14 temazepam tablets. I cut them in half and took half of one when I woke up at 3 or 4 in the morning. I never got to the end of the bottle because my sleep was pretty much sorted by then, I was relaxed and refreshed and could get myself back to sleep if I woke in the night.

If I ever have bad insomnia again I will ask for more.

Sorry, and hi to SocFish, welcome aboard .

Hi socfish.
We already have a nemo fish on board and a squid so you are very welcome

Hi SocFish and well done for posting. That can be a tough step, to put it down in writing and see it there in black and white.

I empathise with your situation - that was me exactly, when others had a mug of tea, I had another few glasses of wine, and I usually thought that I deserved it because I'd been so 'moderate' at lunch!

Post whenever you feel the need, and you'll be surprised by who answers at odd times of the day / night.

Hi, welcome socfish, definitely come here & post when you are battling with the ww. There's normally babes about at all hours.
Just been reading the thread about has parenting affected your mental health. Very very interesting. Lots of mums saying the only thing stopping them cracking up is drinking yet are anxious, irritable, close to the edge. Feel like these two threads need to be linked up.
Also just watched a horrible programme on binge drinking in magaluf, so hope dd never tells me she is thinking of going there .
Night night babes. Wishing everyone a restful sleep x

Thanks All. I think I'll just post here loads and see if that helps.
Yes Venus, I justify my drinking all the time. Why?
I don't even want it. I want to be sober or moderate. But there's that awful part of me that wants to be drunk...and I want that part gone. I'm 43 with two children. The last thing I want is to be a drunk mother. I have no real reason to need that escape. I did in the past, but these days things are nice and settled and mostly life just hums along nicely. In fact if I didn't have this issue with wine, I'd be pretty happy - not perfect, but just happy.
Why do I constantly trip myself up with this shit.

Hello

I'm a lurker but I would like to board the bus.

I want to be sober and stay that way. I gave up drinking earlier this year and managed 60 days AF which I was so happy with. But I had a drink to celebrate something (!) and my drinking has crept back up. I wish I had never started again. And I need to stop.

You have all been an inspiration to me during that time, so thank you.

I hope I can offer support and accept some too.

Pink X

Why indeed. I think if you had the answer to that SocFish you would be onto a winning, multimillion pound formula, like Paul McKenna

I don't know if any of us have managed to unravel the reasons, the whys. We just have to get on and manage our lives day to day, hour by hour if necessary and focus on not picking up that first drink.

Don't worry about the rest of it, next week, birthdays, holidays, etc. Just think about right now. All I know is that the cravings do pass if you can just ride them out. And the more you do that, the easier it gets.

clutter glad some of my ideas were helpful re dd, sounds like you are really in control of some difficult situations - go you!

full keep talking, we are here to listen and help if we can. What is it that makes you so sure you won't drink anymore? Did you use hypnotherapy? Sorry if you said already, I can't remember.

Isinde please come back and spread some Boing if you've got any left. Haven't heard much from you since curry dissed your dp's parenting choices, don't take it to heart lovely x

Hi pink and soc - day 30 for me today.

Ladies I need your help - I have a very stressful weekend coming up - already had conversations with myself abou how I could treat myself to one glass :( I am managing to talk myself out if it - may need hand holding on Saturday and Sunday evening :(
Sorry in advance L

Hi Pink well done on the 60 days - if you've done it once you can do it again.

What were your strategies for not drinking, and what were the benefits? We love an inspirational story to keep the motivation up

Ahh Pink your post is exactly what I need to hear - I know one drink would be wrong for me too :/. Dreading this weekend :/

Lonnika it sounds to me as if you don't want to drink? If that's the case, then the decision is made. Don't dwell on it. As soon as you think about having 'just one', bat that thought right out of your head.

Imagine the coming weekend was behind you already. Imagine that you went and did not drink. Now, two weeks later how do you feel? Do you regret not drinking. Do you wish you had?

No, of course not, that weekend will be over and in the past. It won't have derailed you and it won't have any impact of your current health or happiness.

If you had drunk it would probably not have been just the one. Who knows where it would have led, you could have ended up horribly drunk and embarrassed yourself. And the next day would have been ruined too, with a nasty hangover. You may even have felt the need for a 'hair of the dog' and written off the next day too.

You would be back to Day 1. Is that what you want?

Thank you for the welcome. I know I can do it again, but getting started is so hard. I have done lots of 4/5 days and then drank, when what I want and need is to stop altogether.

A lot of it was fear that helped me stop tbh as I felt so so ill I was almost scared to drink - I had been really caning it - and then the days added up, and feeling better was what kept me away from the wine. I replaced it with sparkling water and peppermint tea and made sure I always had a book on the go so I had something to do in the evenings. Lots of early nights too.

I did also keep a diary and although my maths is fairly pants, I think this is a ballpark figure
I saved roughly £300. 30,000 calories. 540 units in that time. I based this on a bottle of wine a day so 9 units. I'm sure it's not completely accurate as I said but it gave me something to focus on.

I just need to do it again now.

Lonnika

Can you tell someone that you are not drinking? I am going out this weekend too but I have already told DH I will drive so trying to see that as 'job done' I will not be drinking.

I know it's easier said than done but you have done amazingly well so don't blow it like I did! I wish I had never picked that glass up. I actually managed virtually every social occasion except a wedding while I wasn't drinking and once you get there it is fine and I enjoyed it a lot more when I could remember it and had a clear head the next morning.

I know it's not always that simple though, if only it was!

Pink x

Fair - thanks I know you are right - :). I will try and visualise I do find that helps me :)

Pink love the idea of the cost savings and calories -

Pink my event is not social - it is pathetic really. My children are both very sporty and one competes at a very high level - this weekend they are competing and I am very nervous - if they do 'well' that is great - if not I usually 'pick myself up' with a drink - stupid isn't it - anyway trying to think of an alternative to do - so will go for a walk or swim instead.

Already nervous about the weekend / excited. On a positive note I always loose weight when they compete :)

Lonnika that's not pathetic at all - you are recognising and anticipating one of your triggers. You can't avoid this particular trigger so you are planning strategies to cope with it. That's fab

Congrats to your dc for their achievement, that alone is something to be proud of whether they win, lose or draw. I know what you mean about that nervous excitement, it's almost unbearable and the emotional outocme is either exhilaration or depression. The highs and lows of life innit

I hate that disappointed feeling. It's one of the worst emotions for me. I remember back in the olden days, when I were a lad , there was no internet or dvd, heck there wasn't even video recording, and if you wanted to see a movie you had to go to the cinema. I was desparate to see Grease and my mum agreed to take me. We queued and queued and we didn't get in because all the seats were sold out. I was gutted. My dad said, never mind, it'll be on television in about five years

Not the same thing at all, I know, but I remember that awful sinking feeling and nothing could cheer me up. Good job I didn't drink in those days hey?

Right, just rambling now, off to make breakfast.

anyone?

ma, well done on the running.

mintyy I don't think I have proper insomnia just lots of different things make it hard to sleep (allergies, asthma, snoring dp, wakeful children)

LOL Faire - you are very wise - I am very proud :)

Highs and lows of life - ain't that a fact.
Enjoy your breakfast - when is this flaming rain going to stop :(

Yes it's not pathetic and at least you can foresee it. But it would be such a shame to go back to day one (take it from one who knows )

I hope they win!

Ahh thanks Pink - they won't win (we know that - but that's ok at this age - just they have - well eldest does - their own aspirations - gah - love and hate watching them in equal measure). Eldest has received a very generous scholorship from private school due to sporting achievement - :)