The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Posters, Lurkers, Old Or New, Come Take A Seat, This Bus Is For YOU!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

A huge big welcome to the Brave Babes threads.

We're a varied group of posters, on this wonderfully supportive, non judgemental, gigantic Bus, and we are all heading in the same direction - towards Sobriety.

Some of us don't touch a drop of alcohol, some of us do. Some of us drink too much, openly admit it and are desperate to stop and some of us are trying to manage controlled drinking.

No matter what we're doing, we're just trying to do it One Day At A Time.

What ever you need, what ever your habit, chances are that there'll be another poster who is just like you or has been where you are now, already here, waiting to talk or just listen :)

Yes, some of us have been here for a longer time than others, some of us for just a few days but that's what makes this Bus so great imo, the variety of knowledge and understanding :)

This Bus has been whizzing along various roads now for almost four years thanks to the very desperate cry for help from THIS THREAD BY JWN

And if you'd like to read some of the other threads, maybe how we got to where we are today, then you can follow them back using the links RIGHT HERE

Hope to see you soon :)

Day 26 and alls well! Ps thanks isinde I hope so too!!

Baby re the housework and childcare and running around after everyone for very little thanks - how about leaving them to it one evening a week and going out to an evening class? You could go somewhere where no-one knew the 'old' you and have some adult company and a bit of fun for a change. Painting, cookery, pottery, needlework? Anything that you have a mild interest in, or would like to have a go at, that involves working with others and interacting socially. I bet they would appreciate you more if you weren't there to pick up after everyone and organise everything x

ferfux keep posting. If you can stop after two drinks, you know you can do this if you really want to. Stopping is so much harder once you've started. How about trying some of the low/no alcohol stuff and see if it's enough to get you though the 4.30 craving. Also, try to eat earlier because you're less likely to want to drink if you're full on food.

rural sorry to hear things are still tough. Come back whenever you can, just for a chat, a rant, a laugh x

Saf is posting regularly on another thread and I'm on and seems fine. I'm sure that if she checks in on the bus she will update with her news.

< waves to Saf if she's lurking >

Have a good day, all babes, old, new, left, lurking, prospective, etc x

Hello all, can I have a seat please? I'm worried about my drinking - it's got worse and now it's almost a bottle a night. Am conscious that I'm writing that as if it's not in my gift to change that but it gets to 5pm and I so want a drink.

Think it's got worse since our dog died, I miss him terribly and feel I've no purpose really even though that's daft.

So my actions for today have been to post on our local fb site to see if anyone wants their dog walking. And I'm seriously thinking of pouring the half bottle of wine left down the sink but something is stopping me doing that.

inside I think you have hit the nail on the head, our own self loathing makes us submissive but when we're confident in our abilities and no longer a victim we realise we can raise our eyes from the floor!!! I notice this mostly with my teenager who regularly cast up my drinking (though I never stagger about pissed) but allows her to manipulate me and me to allow her to bully me and tidy her room and buy her too many clothes, I'm not sure she likes me without wine because I'm sticking to my guns and with my partner, I'm making demands and he is looking at me bemused. I'm off to the integrated alcohol clinic this morning, not sure what to expect although I'm cop

Oooops I'm coping ok on my own, only thing is I'm gaining we

Oops sorry I'm rushing, I'm gaining weight, drinking sugary drinks and getting up during the night to eat chocolate and buttery jammy toast and I thought I'd be losing weight with dewy skin and swishy hair (I know you've heard it all before from me) but the only thing swishing is the biscuits in my bag xxxxx

Good luck at the clinic this morning baby - hopefully there will be biscuits on offer :) Know what you mean about sugary stuff - I'm forever bragging that I don't have a sweet tooth in my head but as soon as I pack in the booze I'm a maniac for the stuff.

Welcome awks - it's great that you posted. There are a few of us on here that have that 5pm wine witch moment (in truth mine is more 4pm). If you don't want to drink tonight can you line up a non-alcohol treat for yourself to have at that time - something sugary to replace the wine? I'd chuck the wine down the sink - but that's just me. I simply can't have it in the house or I'll find a reason to drink it. Another technique is to ride the craving - so when you're gasping for a drink at 5 tell yourself that you can have a drink but not until 7. Keep busy until then and see if you still want one. You might find that your craving 'window' is shorter than you think. If I can get to 6 without a drink I find I don't 'need' one in the same way as I do at 4 - even if at all.

Morning all, meant to post yesterday but didn't get round to it because this whole not drinking thing makes me really busy!!!

Day...9 today! Had to count on my fingers. Got through the weekend absolutely fine, already told you about Friday night quiz avec sans alcohol wine, then Saturday was just a normal day, swimming lessons, McDonalds and neighbourhood children trashing the house, had a few glasses of Bacchus (non alkie wine) that night and Sunday was a nice easy day out at a country park with a picnic. So slightly boring.

Nothing social coming up till the last Friday in June when I have a girls night out. I have 2 options, one is to not drink and to drive home, the other is to drink and see what happens - see whether I drink too much, see whether I can manage moderation, see whether I drink but don't even like it that much, etc.

I will ponder this over the next week or two, because if you remember my original post my goal in this journey is to never drink to dependent levels again, not never drink again. Along with this never drinking to dependent levels includes not drinking on a daily basis, during the week, this that etc because its that, and the increasing amounts that leads you to drink to dependent levels.

I'm not "scared" of drinking or of having a one-night blow out - that's "normal" in a sense - having them alone isn't, having them every 2nd day isn't, so I just need to ponder on what circumstance I'm "willing" to drink. One of the major reasons I haven't yet committed to never drinking again is that I hope to be able to enjoy drink socially but eliminate the more dysfunctional stuff like drinking at home, drinking alone, drinking way too much, and drinking because I need to.

Thoughts?

Still haven't decided and may not decide till the night...

Oh yeah, and how is it that the scales say I've gained 2 pounds? No, I haven't been eating more, less in fact, because I don't have drunken-hunger. And the non alkie wine is 35 calories a bottle - the same as a carrot.

Fucksticks!

Isinde Hi lovely, I?m here. In the sidecar, got rellies over and cooking like a mad thing for the local restaurant. The rellies are pretty heavy drinkers, like to start around midday, which I?m not, but we haven?t been to bed before three o?clock for the last two nights, and I have put away a fair amount of wine. Also dd got her exam results and is through to next year with flying colours so had a bit of a celebration last night. Am feeling fat, spotty and lethargic and looking forward to rellies going back and having a night off, just bath and bed with my Kindle (sigh). Tatty FWIW, I find that if I think I?ll just have one or two out, then it will always end up being more than that. Then, it seems to reawaken the cravings over the next few days and I?m back in the WW boxing ring. Although, it has to be said, I rarely go more than three days anyway. I too find that if I?m having AF days, I don?t feel like I have to ?make up? for anything, although that is completely stupid because my DH likes to drink practically every day and it?s normally just me and him. But if I feel healthier from having time off, I?m definitely bolshier!! Mouse hope things will get easier for you with your transition for Nemo. Have you got your chillow yet? Hi Purple lovely lady, hope you?re doing ok. Waves to all other babes old and new. It seems like we will need one of those Heeyuuge big band tour buses for all of us soon!

xake so nice to have you on board, how you doing today? awks well done on posting , you will gets loads if support here so stay close and keep posting. faire you are so right I should go out more at night and often intend to but I'm just so tired after chasing a toddler all day at 42 but I need to make more effort. Hi inside mouse purple clutter alias edin tatty ladame ma sorry if I missed anyone, big waves to all babe s posting and lurking. PS looking for a few brilliant books to enjoy on my kindle, please forward any ideas, I'm really looking forward to getting caught up in a brilliant story!!!!! Xxxx

Thanks for the warm welcome - it's good to read other people's stories. I'm trying to make plans for today - poured the cava down the sink and the sound of it fizzing away was horrible but never mind. have bought elderflower cordial and fizzy water and have begged my neighbour to let me walk her dog. So I'm feeling positive now but know at wineoclock I will be wondering whether to drive to Sainsburys.

Tatty weight is one of the reasons I am worrying about drinking but for a different reason. I've lost 3 stone over the last year and was becoming a bit focussed on not eating but continuing drinking alongside keeping the weight off. I just cant carry on drinking and hardly eating so today's the day it all stops.

Says she

hello everyone

Just checking in - stuck in the side car but did manage 1 AF night last night. Sad times here and lots going on the next couple of weeks so probably won't be posting but will read when I can. xx

baby i really liked the series by Peter May which starts with The Black House. Very atmospheric and creepy.
I also love the Game of Thrones series.
indie I am fairly modest in the norkage dept - I just had a nork crisis when I emailed my boss by mistake telling him all about them which is why I am forever associated with norks on this bus.
have you heard from venus?

Hi Baby, can't remember if I mentioned some books to you before but I thought
"A walk across the sun" by Corban Addison was brilliant.
I've also liked any books by Harlan Coben.

One of my all time favourites is The Beach by Alex Garland. Have re-read this book so many times as love the escapism of it.
Totally emphasise with being knackered running after toddler. I keep thinking I'll take up a hobby but by the time I get crazy boy to bed I just want to collapse on the sofa, watch something then get to bed earlyish as he gets up at 6am.
Good luck for search of swishy hair and dewy skin xx

tatty I'm the opposite, I can drink at home and control it, but struggle with social drinking. I have stopped drinking completely when at my in-laws - and feel much better for it (psychologically)

God I so want a beer now I am cooking kids tea.

Hi there lovelies,

Just a quick check in to wish everyone the best. I'm not posting much because life's stupid busy, so I'm mostly concentrating on working and dealing with my crazy ds. Bloody knackered! I'm 5 and a bit months sober and I'm doing the 5:2 fasting.Think I've lost some weight.

Lots of love as always,keep working at it one day at a time lovelies.xxx

Well done Guggs, 5 months is fantastic. Do you still have urges to have a drink at home or in social situations?
I stopped drinking for 12 weeks this year and was feeling great and starting to not have the ww calling, then had leaving do on 4th may, had a drink and it reawakened the ol ww and now trying to get back to the way I felt after 12 weeks sober.
I felt my overall health improved and my tolerance of my wilful child. Need to get back to this place.
X

5 months and 12 weeks are both amazing, well done to you x

Thanks Awks, really want to get back to how I felt.
Have you managed to fend off your craving for a beer? I'd making the kids dinner a particular trigger time for you?
Could you buy some non-alcoholic beer so your still having the ritual part of opening the beer and getting the taste? X

Off out with Ds for his induction visit to high school. He is scared stiff, poor thing.all the new first years will be doing PE. Can't tell you how this thrills an academic chubby sports hater lol. Why does pe have to be the bloody be all and end all. He would have loved a wee sessions in the science lab or music studio!