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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Posters, Lurkers, Old Or New, Come Take A Seat, This Bus Is For YOU!

999 replies

Mouseface · 24/05/2013 10:33

Hello, I'm Mouse Smile

A huge big welcome to the Brave Babes threads.

We're a varied group of posters, on this wonderfully supportive, non judgemental, gigantic Bus, and we are all heading in the same direction - towards Sobriety.

Some of us don't touch a drop of alcohol, some of us do. Some of us drink too much, openly admit it and are desperate to stop and some of us are trying to manage controlled drinking.

No matter what we're doing, we're just trying to do it One Day At A Time.

What ever you need, what ever your habit, chances are that there'll be another poster who is just like you or has been where you are now, already here, waiting to talk or just listen :)

Yes, some of us have been here for a longer time than others, some of us for just a few days but that's what makes this Bus so great imo, the variety of knowledge and understanding :)

This Bus has been whizzing along various roads now for almost four years thanks to the very desperate cry for help from THIS THREAD BY JWN

And if you'd like to read some of the other threads, maybe how we got to where we are today, then you can follow them back using the links RIGHT HERE

Hope to see you soon :)

OP posts:
Mintyy · 07/06/2013 23:44

Oh dearest mouse Sad. I am so truly deeply sorry that you have had a bad day.

Hopefully tomorrow will be better xx

CrabbyBigBottom · 07/06/2013 23:48

Mouse sorry to hear you've had such tough day xx. I hope tomorrow is better. Did Nemo enjoy the day once he'd got over you leaving?

ohcluttergotme · 08/06/2013 08:18

Aww lovely mouse, so so sorry that yesterday was so incredibly hard for you. But, look to the positives, Nemo did it! He liked it, it's all steps in the right direction. Yep you got upset, that's your job, that's what children do to us. Be kind to yourself lovely mouse x Smile
Lonnika, six weeks is amazing, well done I am in awe, I've been there and so want to get there again.
Tatty, well done for resisting ww, you must feel great this morning. I looked up link do the alcohol free wine you out on and think I'm going to get some as like you it's the ritual part for me as much as drinking the wine. We 're having a BBQ in a month and I'm going to get it for that as then will fit in and not draw attention that I'm not drinking.
Day 7 for me. Feel much better today than last weekend and much more able to manage crazy boy (just!)
Wishing all babes a lovely day today. The sun is shining in my part of Bonny Scotland so long may it last!! xx

TattyDevine · 08/06/2013 08:34

The one I really recommend clutter is the Bacchus diabetic white wine. Alcoholfree have removed it from their site, hopefully that's just because they are out of stock not because they are not stocking it! (I have a case of it arriving today, perhaps I got the last one?)

I suggest you buy half a mixed case of various ones and see. They will collect it free and refund you if you don't like it, so it really is risk free. But there should be something there you find acceptable. You could try the Carl Jung, which is very dry. I was drinking Bonne Nouvelle Blanc last night which isn't as good as the Bacchus Diabetic but still perfectly acceptable.

Edinbugger · 08/06/2013 16:54

Day 8 here - woo-hoo! Just heard the neighbours opening a bottle that popped in a cava/prosecco kind of way so bolted to the fridge to pour myself a nice sparkling dose of elderflower cordial in fizzy water. At least I think it's elderflower cordial. I made it myself this week in a bid to fill the witching hour with productive activity - fingers crossed I identified the elderflower correctly. Would be sods law to be poisoned/killed by a bloody NON-alcoholic drink. Hmm

Mouse - hope you're feeling a bit cheerier today and are having a nice weekend.

Tatty - well done for last night, that's awesome. Know what you mean about waking up with a 'thin' feeling - I've had that a couple of mornings too. (Thin being a relative term for someone who is three stone over-weight..)

Anyway - off to the supermarket with DD to buy something lovely for dinner. Have a lovely evening everyone.

dementedma · 08/06/2013 19:13

Grin at edinbugger being felled by non-alcoholic drink. Saw Richard today for a picnic in the park before his shift at the local charity shop.He was clear-eyed,happy, sober....had a gentle game of Frisbee with Ds and looks SO different to the wreck of a man he was a month ago.
Good to see.
mouse are you feeling any better?
thurso sending love as always
Venus are you coping my friend?

aliasjoey · 08/06/2013 19:40

ma that's so great to hear about Richard! And how are YOU ?

I gave up on that MrsD blog - she made it seem too easy! I only read a couple of months, but basically she quit drinking - cold turkey - without any outside help. Friends and family were supportive but hadn't been in her situation. Husband continued to drink around her. She didn't go to AA or get advice from her GP.

The books she read were unhelpful, and she didn't mention any tactics like One Day At A Time or HALT. And she never fell off or had any serious cravings! Doesn't sound at all like any of us! I thought she had got in the habit because of her situation (lots of parties and barbecues) but she didn't have that strong an actual addiction and was able to overcome it fairly easily. Hmm

dementedma · 08/06/2013 20:01

alias I am OK thanks. Still training for race for life and finding it hard. Would help if I could stop drinking of course.

Had to laugh at DH today. I got dd2 to bring through the laundry basket shared by her and dd1.put a wash on and went out, leaving dh to empty the machine. When I got back he asked me in a bewildered way " how many pairs of knickers does a lassie NEED? And some of them, are just string!" Counted 35 pairs of knickers lol.

aliasjoey · 08/06/2013 20:41

35! Shock

Mouseface · 08/06/2013 22:04

Evening, tis me, Mouse

I managed a whole two glasses of that bottle of white last night. I actually couldn't be arsed in the end and went to bed whilst DH watched recorded cricket.

I think it was more a case of "I can't cope with this emotional hurt and torment next week and I'm going to blank it out" than a "I'm really going to nail a bottle of wine"

The sunny weather is a HUGE HUGE HUGE trigger for me, so this afternoon, we've been out in the garden after being out shopping this morning, and all I could think about was Pimm's O'Clock has to be soon!? Hmm

The next thing that I knew it was 8.30pm, Nemo was having his feed and not a drop of Pimm's had passed my lips.

Funny how distraction stops you getting wasted......

Ma - lovely news about Richard. Off to watch tv with DH, Case Histories, recorded and watching back.

Clutter - thinking of you and hoping you are feeling better? Not really read back. Sorry Blush xxx

Night ALL and well done to those who are kicking the WW's ass!!

OP posts:
dementedma · 08/06/2013 22:06

Yup alias and that's not counting the ones they are wearing plus the ones they must still have in reserve, as neither of them is complaining of a knicker shortage yet!

lonnika · 08/06/2013 22:19

LOL Dementedma - :)
Well done mouse for fighting of WW
Can't remember what day it is but it is 6 weeks :).
I know what u mean about warm weather mouse :). So far so good but still a little voice ocassionally in my head - saying go on one won't hurt you :/

aliasjoey · 08/06/2013 22:50

6 weeks! That's fantastic, well done lonnika

fullofhopefullness · 09/06/2013 10:16

Day 24. No hint at all of ww through week and weekend, good times and bad, sunny and rainy. I feel really free. Ill keep recording the days as it makes me feel good. Best wishes to everyone. Xx

Edinbugger · 09/06/2013 10:31

Day 9 here. Supposed to be going to a BBQ later and not sure whether I'll drink or not as my original plan was just not to drink at home. Ho-hum.

hopefull - that's brilliant and it's so encouraging that you're feeling so great. :)

Fairenuff · 09/06/2013 11:31

Morning all Smile

full thanks for sharing. I can totally get that turning to alcohol was your first reaction for such a long time that it became an ingrained habit. And starting to face some of your problems face on is a great way to change those habits for a healthier life. Well done, so far so good Smile

Hi to all. Been a bit busy recently but will check back in later. Some good strategies being shared at the moment. All helpful stuff.

ruralreynard · 09/06/2013 17:30

Just checking in.
big wave to all

Edinbugger · 09/06/2013 17:30

I am in shock. I went to a BBQ and didn't drink. And the world didn't fall in. I was sorely tempted but I didn't - just said 'maybe later' when the first round was offered and then stuck to the softies. Had a perfectly nice time, and came home clear-headed. I can't remember the last time I got through a social occasion like that without getting at least a bit wellied.

However the flip side of my unbelievable smugness is that I have turned into the most irritable woman on the planet - at least as far as my attitude to DH. He's not doing anything different - just being his normal easy-going self - but since I stopped drinking he is driving me absolutely DAFT. Is it possible that we got on when I'm pissed? Sad

Edinbugger · 09/06/2013 17:44

should have said - 'is it possible that we only get on when I'm pissed?"

Can't even type sober.

Fairenuff · 09/06/2013 18:04

Hey rural lovely to hear from you again. How's things?

Edin maybe just a small smidge of you is pissed off that you couldn't drink. But a massive, massive part of you is really pleased with that! Well done. Tomorrow you will wake up refreshed and happy with yourself. Can't beat that feeling Smile

Edinbugger · 09/06/2013 18:47

thanks faire - yes, you're probably right. Just went for a waddle run and feel a teeny bit less grumpy. Next event on the horizon is guests for dinner on Tues. One of them is a total lush (and all round pain in the arse) and he'll be most put out if he doesnt have me as his boozing buddy. But in my stroppy mood I'm thinking sod him - why should I harm myself for his enjoyment. Maybe I need to hang onto this grumpiness until Tuesday evening - it could work for me! Grin

dementedma · 09/06/2013 20:52

hey rural good to see you. hows things?
well done edinbugger

aliasjoey · 10/06/2013 08:31

Feel so shit. Another terrible nights sleep. WTF is wrong with me. Thought I was getting better, taking mirtazapine for sleep and Prozac for the anxiety, but I was awake half the night. Not going to work and feeling very guilty about it.

Have a GP appointment on Wednesday and no idea what to say. had 1 g&t last night, and didn't want any more, so that's one good thing.

babyjane1 · 10/06/2013 10:21

Hi everyone just typed an epic post and lost it so my dog has just heard a barrage of swear words, will redo my name checks later but I'm doing well on day 9 but I empathise with edin I'm getting very annoyed at dh and teenage dd, I'm trying very hard to keep the house tidy and cook nice healthy meals but I get little thanks and feel taken for granted, being sober shows all the cracks and could it be that my life is just mundane???? I thought my depression/drinking was causing tension at home but it seems that maybe when I was lonely and depressed that's when the WW got me in the first place!!! Hope everyone is having a good day, catch up later x x x

ohcluttergotme · 10/06/2013 10:23

Aw Alias, that completely sucks! Sorry things not working with your meds & you had such a shit nights sleep. Could it be a one off bad night and (hopefully) tonight better? Could it e because it was Sunday? I always sleep worse on a Sunday night and usually take a couple of co-codamol on Sunday night which helps (I think)
Although was going back to work today after 2 weeks off with chest infection, didn't sleep great but all ready to go.
We're leaving the house and ds (3) takes a tumble down the front and splits his forehead!
Had to go to sick kids and not made it into work. Feel guilty he fell & guilty I'm not in work!! Hmm
On a plus note abstained from alcohol and my mental health has felt better and more positive this weekend .
Waves to all babes and wishes everyone well xx