The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Posters, Lurkers, Old Or New, Come Take A Seat, This Bus Is For YOU!

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

A huge big welcome to the Brave Babes threads.

We're a varied group of posters, on this wonderfully supportive, non judgemental, gigantic Bus, and we are all heading in the same direction - towards Sobriety.

Some of us don't touch a drop of alcohol, some of us do. Some of us drink too much, openly admit it and are desperate to stop and some of us are trying to manage controlled drinking.

No matter what we're doing, we're just trying to do it One Day At A Time.

What ever you need, what ever your habit, chances are that there'll be another poster who is just like you or has been where you are now, already here, waiting to talk or just listen :)

Yes, some of us have been here for a longer time than others, some of us for just a few days but that's what makes this Bus so great imo, the variety of knowledge and understanding :)

This Bus has been whizzing along various roads now for almost four years thanks to the very desperate cry for help from THIS THREAD BY JWN

And if you'd like to read some of the other threads, maybe how we got to where we are today, then you can follow them back using the links RIGHT HERE

Hope to see you soon :)

Eek, baby, no wonder you got scared, they need to learn how to do that without frightening you! I am sure they will just be following the routine in case you need support - they do come round for all sorts of things, IIRC. I think people are also being very jumpy at the moment and worried they'll be accused of not providing enough support, so they probably are ticking absolutely all the boxes.

I'm sorry for being so random babes and not name checking but oh my fecking God I've just measured myself! First time since I was about 22.

Measurements at 22

36
26
36

Today

41
36
I'm not even going to measure my boobs!!

That's 10 inches around my belly - fuck this shit - I AM NOT DRINKING TODAY!

I was about to order some 31 inch jeans er I'll think again then!

Afternoon babes!

Coming towards the end of day 4, all is well. Feeling my energy, motivation, elevated mood and general sense of wellbeing coming back in droves.

The de-alcoholised wine arrived today and I put a bottle in the fridge to road test. Opened it when I got home.

Its...actually quite good!

I felt a bit panicy and confused as I poured it in my favourite glass...it looked identical to the very thing that's been ruling me a bit for the last year or so, so that reaction was understandable.

First sip, I was a bit meh. 2nd sip...not too bad.

I went to do some "work" (I make bespoke jewellery so I call it "work" because its fun) - I usually do that with the radio on and a glass of wine on the go. So it was good to have this dealcoholized wine, it felt like normal but better, not worse.

Its very thought provoking actually because I remember when I was a young woman of 20 or so I didn't really like wine. It tasted really strong and acidic and just yuck. Its true that its an acquired taste. So I always thought I didn't drink for the taste but for the alcohol.

But that didn't explain why I could take or leave (generally leave!) any other type of drink - can't be doing with spirits, hate whisky and whiskey, don't even really like brandy, don't see the point of vodka, even a gin and tonic doesn't excite me all that much. I sometimes joke with my friends "I'm not an alcoholic, I'm a wineaholic"

Well, there might be something in that...because I always thought if wine tasted like wine but had no alcohol there would be no point. But actually I no longer think this is true. I think this dealcoholized stuff could be a useful tool in avoiding succumbing to drinking alcohol when you don't really want to but avoid feeling left out. Seriously, I could bring a bottle of this stuff to a barbecue and happily drink it, and drive home. It would definitely stop me feeling "left out" which is one thing I hate about not drinking - even if that choice is mine - dieting, pregnancy etc - so that's a turn out for the books, and so far its a useful tool in me analysing the triggers for drinking that may not necessarily be exclusively to do with alcohol.

Don't know if anyone else has any thoughts on this?

Tatty x

PS: Unfortunately it costs the same as normal wine!!!

Tatty I've bought it before - my thoughts were this wine would be quite good... if only it had alcohol in it :) I also used to drink a lot of alcohol free becks. I stopped buying it because it seemed silly to spend the money - if it's for a special occasion though as opposed to just for sitting on the sofa with every night and it helps then why not xx

Yes, exactly, and I'd be using it to initially manage my triggers. Plus I was curious! I'm quite enjoying it though. Weird!

tatty there is a saying "there's more than one way to skin a cat" and I reckon any which way we avoid that horrid old wine witch makes that way the right way, everyone sounding chirpy today, green I went back to slimming world today, I have exactly 2 stone to lose so we can buddy up and check in each week and we will get you into those jeans. I got my visit today, it was a silly visit but I will explain tomorrow, it may be a long post, needless to say I think there will be no further intervention but on the plus side my house is super tidy so every cloud and all that!! Xxx

Oh, can I be in your weight loss gang? I'm carrying most of my weight around my middle and seriously need to lose about five inches there...although I'd settle for three. Or even two. Feckit, anything at all at this stage.

The WW was calling to me hard on the way home this evening, but I got back, stuck on a Shred, and now I feel so good and relaxed, the WW has gone away again.

baby Glad your visit was ok. An,d well done on a tiday house! Mine is very untidy and it's pissing me right off, but not enough to actualyl do anything about it.

Right, I need food. Have a good evening babes. Stay strong!

Another one here with a wine belly. Legs are getting toned with the running but gut is awful.
Seems I like the wine more than I hate the belly though.... I disgust myself.
Venus how are you?

Hi Lovelies.

Sorry to have not been around - it's just all a bit too much just now. Un-NM love and hugs to everyone and thanks for the PMs - you know who you are.

Struggling and failing on a daily basis here but, this morning, am so bloody angry about being so weak (and over-weight!) that I think, maybe, I can see a chink of light.....

Posting on here is very therapeutic and it's helped me enormously in the past but I got to a point where I felt a bit beyond help. (That sounds more dramatic than I meant it too) Just stuck in the same old stupid, washing-machine cycle of self-destructive patterns.

Anyway, just a quick 'pop' onto the Bus to explain my absence and to post a link for a blog I've discovered (apologies if anyone's posted this before). I think it's a great, honest blog by a wife and mum who's struggle sounds very much like lots of us on here. It certainly resonates with me.

The link to the first month of her journey is here:

livingwithoutalcohol.blogspot.co.uk/p/month-1.html

I haven't read it all yet but am hoping it'll give me some inspiration. Hope it'll help some of the other Bus, side-car and roof-rack passengers too. xxxx

Day 22 and a.ls well!!

Purps sorry just read your post - best wishes and sorry things s o difficult. Keep posting through good and bad it will help!!!

Hi babes

Purps sorry to hear you're feeling so crap. I think you should keep posting regardless...I know when I take a break I go a bit off the rails. If you don't post, at least lurk a bit, please? Thanks for the blog link, that looks really interesting.

Full Glad to hear you're doing so well.

All is well here too. The WW is already telling me that it's Friday and I need her, but there's also a lot of other things I want to do this evening (running, making rhubarab tart, practicing my massage on DP) that I won't be able to do if I drink, so. There's a choice to be made. But I've taken an executive decision to not think about this evening right now.

Have a good day all!

purple lovely to hear from you and I'm sure that nobody is beyond help. I suppose it is hard if you feel you're failing, and daily posts on here is a reminder of that? Please remember:

1. Failing to be sober is NOT the same as failing in general. You are a caring and hard-working mum, friend etc

1. Failing to be sober yesterday is NOT the same as failing to be sober forever.

Now I will go and look at that blog do some work

Morning, sorry haven't been around all week but have been under the weather with a lung infection, since hitting 50 in February my health seems to be taking a battering! As Miflaw wisely says "tackle the thing that will kill you first",(or something similar), in my case it's the smoking that has caused my health problems so that's what I have to tackle first.

But if it's ok with everyone I will keep posting on here as I need to tackle my drinking as well, as I have said many times I don't drink daily or nightly, it's when I have that first drink that I have a problem stopping.

ha, I got to 2 weeks on that blog, and she was going "I really don't miss it, blah blah" I was thinking that doesn't sound like us!

the next post - her craving came back. Yes, it all sounds so familiar...

Hi all
purps good to see you
Am in the grip of the ww at the mo so not got much to add.
thurso are you OK?

Full. - you are doing great :)
Purple.- hope you are feeling better and stronger soon :)
Obrigada. - keep posting
Nearly 6 weeks here ! had a shit day sooooo wanted a wine but it lasted about 3 minutes and now Ok -

Take care babes
Hope all the newbies that posted r ok ?
Lots of love L xxx

Well done to you as well lonn!!

green and theala - sharing the pain about the waist measurements. Mine is appalling and I know it's all down to booze. When I stopped drinking last week I started doing 5:2 again cos it blasts inches off my gut for some reason. Last time I did it I lost about 2 inches off my tummy in a fortnight (I cut the booze waaaay back) but as the drinking crept up again it all became a bit pointless (impossible only to eat 500 cals when a nightly bottle of wine is already 700!). Might be worth looking at though cos done right I think 5:2 can also help with blood sugar/insulin resistance issues which I'm convinced play into wine cravings (in my case anyway).

purple -that's a great link - thanks for posting it. The one thing that stops me drinking at night is getting into bed with a good 'I'm not drinking" blog.

Hope everyone is doing okay.

Evening, tis me Mouse

Just wanted to check in, say hi and will try to catch up over the weekend.

Nemo has had his first taster day at school and it was horrifically hard for me to walk away from him begging him me not to leave him. It was the hardest thing, bar surgery, that I have had to go through with him.

And, we have four more to go.....

He is too small, too unsure, too fragile, too delicate.............. it's too soon. I hated it, the support from his school was fucked up. Preschool were amazing.

I cried my heart out. His preschool one to one was outstanding and knew how I'd feel. She hugged me and made me cry! The situation made me cry.

So, tonight, I have failed a bit, I'm drinking wine. I am going to have to whole bottle. My meds are fucked up. They (pharmacy) have fucked them up.......

Not the best example, always a trooper well tonight, I am not.

Sorry x

Aww mouse it will get easier, every day. Be gentle with yourself.

Oh mouse that sounds beyond crap. Wish I had some words of wisdom but I don't. Just be kind to yourself.

Sorry to hear you are struggling Mouse

Thanks for that blog Purple I am working my way through it.

I have had a very positive day and positive week. Basically I haven't drunk all week, so finished Day 5. But the really great thing was that I went out tonight, I had a quiz fundraising thing at my son's school. Normally a quiz night I'd drink. People in my team had beer and stuff on the table. Someone had offered yesterday to give me a lift because she wasn't drinking, so I could drink.

Anyway, I politely declined the lift because I knew that might mess with my mind, and I brought a bottle of the alcohol free wine that I was talking about (from this website , don't even bother with supermarket ones) and I drank that over the course of the evening.

It stopped me feeling left out.

I have a case of it arriving tomorrow, now I know I like it. It means that when the WW visits me (and I think with me a lot of the WW swooping in is about the ritual of it - sunny day, husband having a beer on the patio, want to join him, that kind of thing) it will "do" instead, and stop me feeling actively deprived. And I do like the dry zingy fruity bite of wine (sorry not trying to trigger anyone) and this version does still have that - (not sweet like some of the shite you get in supermarkets) so it sort of hits the spot really.

But method aside, it feels really great to be home after a good night out stone cold sober, tired but in a genuine way, not needing to take a litre bottle of water to bed with me, knowing I will have a deep, fulfilling sleep and wake refreshed.

Also, this week I've woken up "feeling thin". (You know that feeling you get where you haven't eaten that much or you have done a lot of exercise or something, but its a certain lightness in the belly area of virtuous clean living) - I've been waking up with that each day! I don't eat terribly badly or too much, so my diet is pretty good, lots of fresh food and nothing too processed or bad, so really my weight worries are all down to wine, 100%. Did you know it has 7 calories per gram (alcohol that is) and it gets absorbed through your stomach wall and pretty much stops you burning any other kind of energy before its used up, or something along those lines. Its kind of like injecting butter! (someone science boffinny should come and correct me for that statement, but till then...keep it in the back of your mind!)

Mwah my babes, and I do hope everyone is good and those who are struggling to be good can be even better tomorrow.

Nite
Tatty x