This is the dating thread 54, all welcome!

[JulietteMontague]

All very welcome to share online and real life dating experiences.

I would suggest that women tend to more picky and specific about what they find attractive, and men tend to be likely to find a wider range of women attractive?

I know, eh ? Mind, at least you've not been confronted by IvorbigUn.

I'm minded to agree with you Mercury but I was struggling to think of a diplomatic way to say it.

I think if I was on the 1:7 ratio I would be fairly sorted by now and i dont mean that to sound big headed...I just literally find it impossible...

I don't even think I am very picky looks-wise (apart from the no beard rule). I don't think fancying someone is all that much about pure looks. There's so much more going on, and that is why it's so incredibly difficult to work out from an online profile and messages whether or not there's going to be any chemistry.

Feeling pretty discouraged by OD at the moment. Thought about taking a break but that would probably make me feel worse - at least at the moment I feel like I'm trying to do something about things.

Been chatting to a decent sounding man on Match but he revealed last night that he only came out of a twenty-year relationship at Christmas. So I am thinking that is a bit of a no-no as he's just going to be on the rebound, which is a shame. Been caught that way before though with LM (who was not entirely honest about when his marriage ended).

See, I've even had to abandon the no-beard rule, OWW, it's a sad state of affairs.

OD is pretty discouraging a lot of the time but I find the tantalising, if remote, prospect of actually meeting someone wonderful keeps me going.

Ike that's cos you is dead foxy.

Is this a bad time to mention my beard is growing back? I was going for the designer stubble thing but there's a fine line between stubble and a full beard..

Actually I think that what is wrong with me is that I strongly suspect that Titto is actually getting married tomorrow. Can't believe how low I feel about this. I just can't understand how someone who is such an abusive twat has actually just walked into a happy new life, new family with ready-made replacement stepkids, all loved-up when here I am struggling with almost everything.

I probably find 1 in 20 men attractive, at best. Hence why I have rarely messaged anyone. And delete 90% or more of the messages I receive.

I possibly am too fussy...

I'm sure it only adds to your magnificent plumage Bant

Bant the stubble thing is probably okay, it's when men's faces are actually hairy that it becomes well and truly boaktastic. Stay the right side of that line . . .

the one in seven was just a figure pulled out of the air - I haven't actually sat down and worked it out for real. Maybe I should..

Nope, it's not fair OWW but let's face it, it might look like Titto is living the dream but the reality is going to be very different, imagine the poor woman and kids stuck with him, you're making a better life for yourself and your children.

OWW I successfully ignore Showbiz's beard by pretending it's not there, like Douglas Adams' 'Someone Else's Problem' field.

I think a bit of a beard is quite nice - Mr Nice grew one over Christmas which sadly went away again. Might encourage him to grow it again.

Am in London doing exam marking. Is with other people so am being a little sociable rather than chained to my desk alone. Go back tomorrow after work (have to work tomorrow...) but Mr Nice will be picking me up at the station and then we will retreat to bed for a little while

Ah Miranda I'm all (not at the beard or working in London)

I know, Nora, I feel very sad and worried for his new wife and her children, but from his point of view he has got exactly what he wants.

I think its quite hard when ex husbands/ wife's remarry, especially if they were the ones that caused the breakdown of the marriage. The only thing that holds true is, they wont have changed who they are. So, every abusive, cheating thing they did, they will do the same again. Dont ever compare your ' inside' to someone else s ' outside'

I like beards. I rarely find men online who i find attractive, its the same in real life too. I don't think its picky, I would still go on a date with someone who I didn't physically like, if they had a great personality in the hope that they might be a grower. But, we are all attracted to what we are attracted to, It is a physical thing too, as much as a mental one.

I have a surprise 6th date tonight. Haven't chatted for a few weeks as we had a bit of a disagreement last time we met. Wasn't expecting to hear from him again, all came about a bit sudden and hes taking me out to dinner tonight.

Hello all.

New to this thread but I'm currently going through a bit of a potential 'situation'

Background: recently (last summer) out of a very LTR with an abusive twunt. Divorce underway. DCs freaking out. So I was planning on one day finding Mr Right but not now.

However, turns out that Mr Possible lives very close. But I'm so crap at this dating malarkey that I have no idea at all whether he likes me or not! He seems to be making excuses to contact me (there are genuine ones too - his dc spends a lot of time here) but twice this week he's turned up/rung with no excuse at all. But then, I could be just reading something into nothing.

He's very lovely (twat radar is tuned to super-high setting after STBXH) and I spent a few days wondering whether there was anything there or not. Now I think there might be on my side. I was not looking for anything at all, but I'd happily take whatever's on offer!

He seems to be everything STBXH is not. I'm quite excited by all of this and feel about 14 again. I'm also boring the two RL people who know about this rigid so I thought I'd post here and see what you nice people have to say.

events - sounds great. We probably can't give much advice apart from keep the radar on but it sounds good so far. Sometimes things come along when you're not looking and maybe you deserve to be treated well for a change.

Happy to hear more details though - it's always good to hear about nice things happening to good people

I don't know if I've said this out loud before but Dutch has a moustache.

A 70's German porn star moustache.

In mitigation, it seems to be the go to accessory in his part of Netherlandia. In these parts, it will be assumed he is gay. Which is fine but not regular gay, some kind of ironic hipster showoff gay. It's bad. 2 miles down the road where they like a riot he will be chased down the street. Especially if he wears the German stylee leather waistcoat thing I've seen. It's bad.

It wasn't so noticeable in photos as he was on the boat and I thought it was due to not shaving at sea. I pretend it's not there and have encouraged stubble so it visually recedes. I'm hoping he will be amenable to clipping it shorter at some point.

And then some.

I know - it does sound good. Feels great too! It's nothing at the moment, but I'm really hoping that my gut feeling is not wrong and that he does like me. And it is a lovely feeling - that fluttery, giggly feeling. I've not experienced it in such a long time. STBXH gave me butterflies of all the wrong sort

I'm seeing him tomorrow (valid reason ) so I guess I'll be back if anything happens. The main thing is that I'll be needing help unravelling the clues - he's a pretty proper sort so I do'nt think he's just going to jump me. Which is a shame

I have to play things pretty close to my chest though - I'm in mortal fear of being outed on here again

OWW you know the answer is because she is taken in by Titto and he has his next victim. Easy, and it's all going to play out again soon.

Hello Events - that sounds very lovely, it's funny, isn't it, how all those 14 year old 'ohmygod ohmygod, he looked at me !' feelings still occur.

Well you certainly kept that quiet Juliette ! Is he accompanied by dreadful cheesy 70s porn guitar music everywhere he goes ?

I expect all the men I have met in RL wouldn't get a look on an OD site.

I don't think Mr R&R would do it for me on paper. In RL though there is that allusive 'something'.