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Original poster

This is the dating thread 54, all welcome!

999 replies

JulietteMontague · 15/05/2013 23:36

All very welcome to share online and real life dating experiences.

OP posts:
Bant · 26/05/2013 07:48

Hi JustForFun

don't worry about not being able to post regularly - plenty of people just dip in and out - we all have lives :)

As WFF said - you don't owe your dates anything apart from politeness. Some people feel a buzz, butterflies or something, on a first date, other people are horribly let down, other people just feel a 'meh' and think it's not worth a second date.

A lot of dates, though, can be growers - give them a second date and see if they do grow on you. That has worked successfully for some people on here. Mostly though if there isn't a chemistry on the first date it's going to limp on until one of you calls it quits.

Lots of people have said it's a numbers game. I'd be very surprised (although it's possible) if the first or second person you dated turned out to be perfect for you. I'd say give them the benefit of the doubt if date #1 is okay, see if feelings grow on date 2, if not then just let them down gently with a 'lovely to spend time with you but I'm just not feeling the chemistry' text. Maybe you could be friends (it does happen, I still chat occasionally to the Nurse from several months ago) but it's unlikely. But don't waste their time and yours.

On a completely unrelated note, I thought 'cockamamie' was a type of soup?

Bant · 26/05/2013 07:50

oh and Raf - an acceptable protocol for being stood up like that is to let him arrange a follow up date, make him work hard for it (somewhere inconvenient for him to get to, but not unrealistically so) then just don't show and block him.

KinNora · 26/05/2013 08:18

Raf the tosser stood you up ? How very very ignorant of him, I'd just block (and have a fabulous time with the oil rigger).

Morning everyone and hello Twinny, brace yourselves, I've had a message from a really attractive man from ... GSM - I shit you not. I have a vague feeling that I've previously discounted him as one of his photos shows him enjoying a revoltingly wholesome and hearty outdoor lifestyle, whereas I'm more your dark and decadent cocktail bar type but still.

(He's going to be a tedious twat isn't he ? )

KirstyWirsty · 26/05/2013 08:22

Nora he might not be .. Whynot arrange a meet up?

KinNora · 26/05/2013 08:46

Hello Kirsty, how's the climber chappy coming along ?

Hearty sent me a really very bland message, I've sent him a reasonably silly reply which I've found to be my acid test, if they can't cope with silly, we won't get on.

KinNora · 26/05/2013 08:54

Oh dear, he made me laugh, I fear the worst.

Original poster
JulietteMontague · 26/05/2013 09:16

Kin the thing with gsm men is that you can't always see the TT Rating on screen as it's hidden by apparent reasonableness. Meet him, you never know he may have a big cock

Just sometimes dates can grow on you, just do what you want to do. What WFF and Bant said sums it up.

Bant 'none of he above matter', hat shop!

Dutch is off to the boat today for six weeks, it is having a major overhaul. The contractors working on it are based on an industrial estate a couple of hours away so he'll be up there staying in his caravan during the week. I was a little Hmm about his, imagining I'd spend part of my next visit a tiny dank van, no facilities, parked on the factory forecourt. Being the ever thoughtful Dutch though, he knows I like a view so he's actually placed it close to the boat right on a pretty canal in a sheltered private garden. I've now seen pictures, it's a naice caravan, pristine and built for big dutch sized people so all will be well Grin.

OP posts:
ALittleStranger · 26/05/2013 09:17

Raf I'm fairly open minded about giving people a second date chance. If I don't find them unattractive and conversation has been good I'll agree to a second date if asked. I have to say this has never been rewarded with a second look thunder bolt.

ALittleStranger · 26/05/2013 09:18

What's the TT rating Juliette?

I only do GSM. My big complaint is wetness. There's, not mine.

ALittleStranger · 26/05/2013 09:18

gasp their's obviously.

OhWesternWind · 26/05/2013 09:24

Nora you're having us on - a funny man on GSM in amongst all that earnest pomposity? Never.

Bant so pleased for you. What a wonderful thing to happen and you are off to a great start

Raf what an absolute tit. Hope tonight's date is a blinder just to make up for it!

Hi JFF I have problems with this myself. When do you stop seeing if they're a grower? And what I find particularly difficult is when they actually ask you on the date what you think of them and if you'd like to see them again. I always end up saying yes. Awful.

Had this with last night's date, absolutely barking but a decent night out, very keen on me, but too much talk about money, very odd trousers and kept jiggling his leg about and trying to kiss me. Not fanciable at all. He has just sent me a gushing text, oh dear. Help!!

OhWesternWind · 26/05/2013 09:28

Juliette Dutch is just lovely. A van with a view ...

KinNora · 26/05/2013 09:31

'Wetness - theirs, not mine' - that made me laugh a lot Stranger

Juliette for some reason I thought Dutchy was coming over here next time. So, caravan sex, eh, has he got it firmly tethered ?

I don't really like a big cock, I prefer medium as none of my children exited via the traditional route and I'm 'honeymoon fresh' - disclaimer, this was something I read that was written in US Obstetricians' sales pitch, it amused me very much and I've used it ever since, I am casting no aspersions on any vaginas which have been used as an exit, in fact I was envious for a long time

KinNora · 26/05/2013 09:34

He sounds like a real winner OWW 'odd trousers and jiggling his leg about' - blimey.

Original poster
JulietteMontague · 26/05/2013 10:21

Stranger TT Rating = tedious twat as per Kins gsm man assessment

Kin arf at 'Honeymood fresh', ghastly ( not you, the idea of it). Fwiw big cocks are overrated imo.

Yes, Dutch was going to come over here, but now we're closer, the point would be to see my life home in my RL not in a random hotel. DS will be moody and demanding, school will have finished so it would all be a bit 24/7 fraught. After a month apart, I just want to relax with him and spend time together. His house is ideal, it's a converted barn surrounded on all sides by fields, the nearest farm is 200 meters away, nearest road even further. Can tip out of bed straight into the garden and spend hours having Ccoffee. Once we're established, he can have a short, low key visit here. DS will be off to Uni in September so it then stops being an issue.

OP posts:
KinNora · 26/05/2013 10:29

I sniggered at the 'spending hours having C coffee'. I feel your pain about an A-levelling ds, mine keeps hilariously threatening to 'take a year out' and not go to Uni in September - . He sulked about having to wait in for an engineer the other day because 'no-one had asked him nicely'

WarmFuzzyFun · 26/05/2013 15:15

Don't you know Kin teenagers are the sun, moon and stars rolled into one?Smile What were you thinking?Hmm

Scrazy · 26/05/2013 16:27

Oh dear, I seemed to have accidentally met someone else and their might have been snogging involved!! What to do about Mr non committal, serves him right, I guess.

Scrazy · 26/05/2013 16:47

There not 'their'. There was alcohol involved and it's strictly only cheating if you DTD isn't it?

WarmFuzzyFun · 26/05/2013 16:59

Yeah that's right Scrazy. Unless the 'exclusive' convo has been really specificGrin.

I'll give you a Jezebel badge for that though Wink

WarmFuzzyFun · 26/05/2013 17:00

FYI: Jezebel badge is similar to the Blue Peter Badge, only more prestigious

Flipper924 · 26/05/2013 17:56

Bant, zoo and rl girl sound good. Am hopeful, but did she say anything about the guy she's seeing?

Raf, tosser. Next!

Just, if you enjoy his company and don't mind seeing him again, then go for the third date. If you're not sure, and are worried he'll think you're leading him on, then why not send him a text saying just that?

I've just discovered that I've chatted on OKC with my neighbour!!! I'm rubbish with faces, and hadn't twigged until he said something today when he stopped and said hello over the fence. He asked me for a glass of wine, but I said i was off out tonight, because I was so taken aback (and because I thought he was married because I hadn't twigged who he was)! I've messaged him and said I've been stood up tonight now, and is the glass of wine still on. I'll have to scrub the compost out from under my fingernails...

Moanranger · 26/05/2013 18:07

Well, things have progressed with Meet Up guy. Let's just sat foreplay training NOT required, and I reached the sunlight highlands of sexual nirvana & more than once Grin
Some emotional panicking over What This Is? Decided to stop over-thinking & enjoy it - whatever - even if it ends up FWB.
He is very much " what you see is what you get" unlike my STBXH who was dark & anguishing about everything. It is hard to explain, but someone straightforward can be an adjustment. Many compliments & he seems crazy about me - much better than that "oh, you'll do " attitude you can sometimes get.

KinNora · 26/05/2013 18:08

Ooh Flipper how very exciting, have a lovely time and do report back.

Flipper924 · 26/05/2013 18:13

Just waiting to hear exactly which number he lives at....don't fancy ringing all the doorbells on the way and having to explain...

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