Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse

[Mosman]

"H" has lost his job. I wasn't working because we don't have a visa or permanent residency now.
I'm in Perth the rent is paid until Tuesday, he's getting a week in lue of notice, 4 children and about $700 to my name.
Does anyone know if the embassy or someone will fly us home.
I can't take much more tbh

I could go back to the UK, sort out the house properly, he could get a job and give me a ring when he's got pr and I might come back depending on what's happening in my life or he'll just have to wave bye to the kids if being in Australia is more important to him.

What skills do you have?
I'm on the other side of the ditch and have seen loads of project management and BA jobs advertised in Perth, which might be an option. There are also some technical writing jobs going but not as many.

HR and recruitment unfortunately, times like this I wish I had a bit more substance. I've always done quite well in the past but as soon as there's any bumps in the road it seems to hit quite hard.
He is a sales manager for an industry that seems to have been replaced with a you tube video.

Does it have to be Perth? Are your industries dependent on the big cities, or could you consider moving to, say, Ballarat or somewhere where it's cheaper? Although I have to say that if you can earn 40 thousand in the UK, and you're sure he'll send the kids after you, then I would do that. I can't imagine giving up that sort of career to follow a speculative job hunt on behalf of someone long term unemployed. Time to take the leadership, Mosman.

I have a couple of friends in HR in Melbourne, is that any use to you?

OK, I've gone on LinkedIn and found the following HR jobs in Perth:
www.linkedin.com/jobs?viewJob=&jobId=5685299&srchIndex=1&trk=njsrch_hits&goback=%2Efjs_*1_*1_*1_I_au_*1_*1_1_R_true_*1_*2_*2_2_*2_*2_hr_*2_*2
www.linkedin.com/jobs?viewJob=&jobId=5674302&srchIndex=4&trk=njsrch_hits&goback=%2Efjs_*1_*1_*1_I_au_*1_*1_1_R_true_*1_*2_*2_2_*2_*2_hr_*2_*2
www.linkedin.com/jobs?viewJob=&jobId=5628892&srchIndex=52&trk=njsrch_hits&goback=%2Efjs_*1_*1_*1_I_au_*1_*1_3_R_true_*1_*2_*2_2_*2_*2_hr_*2_*2
www.linkedin.com/jobs?viewJob=&jobId=5627776&srchIndex=65&trk=njsrch_hits&goback=%2Efjs_*1_*1_*1_I_au_*1_*1_3_R_true_*1_*2_*2_2_*2_*2_hr_*2_*2
www.linkedin.com/jobs?viewJob=&jobId=5627776&srchIndex=65&trk=njsrch_hits&goback=%2Efjs_*1_*1_*1_I_au_*1_*1_3_R_true_*1_*2_*2_2_*2_*2_hr_*2_*2
www.linkedin.com/jobs?viewJob=&jobId=5614099&srchIndex=75&trk=njsrch_hits&goback=%2Efjs_*1_*1_*1_I_au_*1_*1_4_R_true_*1_*2_*2_2_*2_*2_hr_*2_*2
Hopefully this might be useful!

I was a dickhead tort, as was pointed out by numerous mumsnet terms at the time but you want to believe in your husband.
I'm all over those jobs, thank you so much for taking the trouble to find them I really appreciate it.
At the moment I'm putting the children and I first and that's that.

Sydney is better than Melbourne as at least I have a couple if sofas there

Yep, gotcha Mosman, I was trying (and failing, sorry) not to sound like I thought it was all your fault. Obviously it's not all your fault. What kind of fucker demands that their partner give up a lucrative breadwinning position to drag the entire family across the world? Oh, the kind of fucker who thinks that men get to be in charge and taking care of kids is emasculating, by any chance? Yep, thought so.

Could you not pay arrears off on the house then put it on the market, is there any equity in it?

Where do you want to be? Australia or the UK?

We would be in negative equity in all honesty the only thing that makes me want to hold onto the house is the £50,000 we spent on it and the £23,000 deposit, I'm hoping of we hang on by the finger nails one day we'd see a return on that or at least live rent/mortgage free but equally I know sometimes the right thing to do is let go of bad investments. We bought in 2007 so timing was all shit - my fault on that occasion.
Where do I want to be, million dollar question. I'd want to be in Australia but with PR, then I could do this one my own.
I've two Interviews set up for this week so fingers crossed.

It does amaze me though because if he looked after the kids, that was when he did his online chatting whilst they played or the baby slept. Maybe baby boo is too old now to be taken to coffee shops to meet his tarts without reporting back to mummy.

I have been in Australia on a 457 (well four of them) for 8 years. Does your H hold the current 457 - ie you are defacto on it and can therefore work anywhere? If that's the case, while it is still valid (you have 28 days) you are the only one who realistically stands a chance of finding work. It is practically impossible to find work without a visa from within Australia, so he won't have much luck unless he's got a specific skill that is in limited supply.

The job market was poor at the start of the year but it's been picking up - I'm getting a lot of calls from agents at the moment. I think you'll find something if you apply like mad. I find that generally the jobs advertised don't lead to anything, but if you get your face/CV in front of agents they usually find something.

If you do get offered work you may be asked to show them your visa details - once you've done that (ie with the current visa) you will be home and dry as they won't ask again. You will be working illegally once the visa is cancelled if your H's company bothers to notifiy immigration. However, if you get offered a job, once you have worked for two years you can apply for PR through that company - it's a bit of a gamble but you may have the full four years if the visa isn't cancelled.

Have you checked to see if you have enough points to apply for PR independently (well, to be put into the big bucket where you can be invited to apply).

Interestingly I am in a similar situation to you - I am tied in a house with my DP while we wait for PR to come through, we are separated but have to live together for the visa. I decided it was better for DD to stay in Oz, she's been here since she was 2 and so I'm gritting my teeth and putting up with things - otherwise we'll have to return to the UK.

Good luck if you decide to stay and look for work.

It was my 457 and they haven't cancelled it five months so that's good.
Basically unless he works he doesn't eat I am not keeping him after how he repaid me last time.

I think it's a huge decision to make. As to the house in the UK, you may have additional costs to pay if the bank repossess and have to sell it to recoup the mortgage. If you are in negative equity, and they can't get the total mortgage amount back, they may still have a claim against you. If you repay the arrears and keep the tenants, could you find any rent money to rent somewhere else in the UK?

I think whatever happens, UK or Aus, you should be planning a life on your own.

Well they can try to recoup the costs but if we haven't got it they can't have it.
The rent it can command won't cover the mortgage unfortunately.
The only real reason to save the house is to live in it myself and I don't think I want to in all honesty.
My plan would be to get hold of that £7k and use it to get back on my feet, rental deposit, car, school uniform etc.
I look at unemployment in Australia running at 4% v's 8% in the UK and it strikes me Mr M is staying until he at least gets PR then we all get uprooted again or things improve in the UK and he can come back.
Either way I'm on my own.

Oh dear - it's not good if it's your 457 - you are only allowed to work for the employer nominated on it and it's not transferable. I have been through many years of visa hell here and it's not pretty. You would need to find somebody prepared to sponsor you. It can be done - agencies will sponsor you if they approach you for a role and if you have a job offer some companies such as Lesters are able to provide you with a visa. It's a huge pain in the arse - I've just spent 2 years working for a bunch of idiots on a stupid rate to get PR and they folded 6 weeks before the 2 year mark and so I'm back to square one. Recruitment agencies seem to bring their British staff out on 457s all the time though, so that might be a route for you?

Realistically you might have no option but to return to the UK unless you can sort out the visa situation. If you think your H might get PR you'll have to pretend to still be a viable couple if you want to piggy back onto it - we've just got our 4th 457 and we had to jump through a lot of hoops to prove our relationship this time. It's still going to be 2 years.

We've managed to get our latest visa by DP transferring from a contract to a perm role - he said he would on the basis of a visa, which meant we dodged having to leave by just a few weeks after my organisation went bust.

Have you spoken with a migration consultant at all?

If you took the visa issues out of the situation, where would you rather be with the DCs?

Honestly I'd rather be in perth, the kids are happy here and the place in the UK is utterly tainted, no getting away from that. SHE was an ex pupil at the same school as my daughter attended that sort of thing. I don't think I'd be able to resist waiting in costa for her and emptying something over her head.

Sorry, but you do sound rather obsessed with your husband's infidelity and, to be honest, with the drama.

You are unwilling to return to the UK because you might lie in wait for the woman your husband slept with and pour coffee over her head? That's your greatest concern? What are you, 12? (And I'm quite surprised that you have so much venom for the other woman but are quite willing to live under the same roof as your husband.)

By the way, I hope you don't insult your husband in front of your children or call them "little buggers" to their face.

Oh I am pretty obsessed with the whole "drama" right now, is that not ok given the circumstances ? And believe me he gets both barrels most days.

I spoke to h earlier, and he reckons if either of you can get a job that can sponsor you on a 457, then that can replace the original 457's, as in you have 28 days in which to find another job.
If I hadn't broken my leg, I'd be more use to you Mos....sigh.
Good luck with looking for a new job, I'll have my fingers crossed for you x

Jeez, who could be bothered with the faff? Just pack up and come home to the UK and start again without him.

If it were me, nothing, nothing, NOTHING could persuade me to remain living like you are. You tried, it went pear shaped. There's no shame in coming home OP.

I need him to get a job to pay maintenance

Whilst there's no shame, I agree if we both arrive back in blighty with suitcases and no jobs, on benefits then we've blown over £20,000 and lost a year of the kids education for nothing.

They probably won't get into the better schools, we'll get the places nobody wanted. It's heartbreaking.
I have an interview for the job in Sydney today, if I get that I'll take it, move over on my own, get settled and he can hold the fort whilst he finds a decent job in Perth or Sydney. At that point it makes sense to either come back to the UK knowing he can pay maintaince or I might be able to manage the kids on my own in Sydney with my brothers help.

Sorry to hear about your leg LD (is it C? Btw)