Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse

[Mosman]

"H" has lost his job. I wasn't working because we don't have a visa or permanent residency now.
I'm in Perth the rent is paid until Tuesday, he's getting a week in lue of notice, 4 children and about $700 to my name.
Does anyone know if the embassy or someone will fly us home.
I can't take much more tbh

[RandomMess]

Well the reality of being just with him full time may well be a little different...

[Gobbolinothewitchscat]

Mos - what if you get a job and he thinks he can get maintenance from you?

[Lweji]

If he's only fun dad, then I'm sure they would rather be with him, but it's not necessarily the best for them.

[Mosman]

I had thought of that I'd only have to pay $1500 a month to him which believe me wouldn't feed them in Perth but would go a long way in the UK but he doesn't want to return.
If I come back and he pays me with various benefits I think I'd get about £3500 a month all in which means we could bloody eat, if I the worked even 20 hours a week we'd be laughing.

[Mosman]

So a development, his father has offered to lend us £7,000 however my concern is are we throwing good money after bad? I think I could keep up the payments going forward but I don't want to live in the area where SHE lives around the corner, the tescos where they swapped numbers is the local shop, the coffee shop where they kicked things off is really close.
Should I just let the house go and if the offer is still there use the money to rent somewhere else in the country?
Of course the other thing is that we left that house and area is that he couldn't get a job there, so maybe I won't

[SconeInSixtySeconds]

Would you not be better taking the money and then selling the house? Surely it will affect your credit rating if the house is repossessed?

[Gobbolinothewitchscat]

I would not let the house go - if you do, you're credit rating will be fucked

You don't have to live there forever but it's a base for now

I do realise its upsetting but the. glamour of swapping numbers in the local Tesco's. the twunt really knows how to live it up!

[Gobbolinothewitchscat]

your credit rating not you're

[Mosman]

Oh tell me about, you should see the classy B and B they both paid £25 each towards, I wouldn't have been fucked there by Adam Levine himself nevermind a married overweight balding twat. They deserve each other but sadly neither of them wants the other.

[Gobbolinothewitchscat]

So basically she had to pay £25 for the privilege of shagging him

[Mosman]

My concern is that a) it ain't my credit rating that's going to be affected b) everyone knows why I've come back, my own big gob unfortunately c) I'd be messing the kids around again because I know I'm not stating there long term.
Arghh sorry I've answered my own question.

[Mosman]

Yep
And cook him dinner on another occasion and then he couldn't even get it up and she never came - I have evidence of this from both sides - it's fucking pathetic

[Doha]

Just why are you still with him then?
Time to cut loose and start again

[Mosman]

I'm not "with him" I'm just in the same house

[AnyFucker]

Mos, you do seem to still be considering staying with him "in the same house" in your future plans though

Surely now is the time to make a decision, any fucking decision, that doesn't include him ??

[AnyFucker]

Lovey, in all your threads, you have repeatedly been advised to find any way you can to stop hitching your wagon to this absolutely cretinous, dick-led loser. Do it now, in anyway you can. Go home to your parents, cap in hand. It has to be better than this. He will destroy you....and still you would stay.

[Gobbolinothewitchscat]

Agree with both AF's posts. Like the phrasing of the second one better!

[Horsemad]

You cannot seriously be contemplating leaving without ALL of your children?!
Imagine how they may feel, possibly abandoned?
Not to mention you don't know what stunt he might try and pull once you've left.
Take you FIL's kind offer and get out NOW.

[expatinscotland]

I know a way to instantly improve things, Mos: GET RID OF THIS MAN. I don't pray as I don't believe in God, but I'd take the money loaned by your dad and LEAVE THIS DICKSMACK and take all the kids with you.

A house about to be repossessed is not repossessed. There's time yet.

[SconeInSixtySeconds]

Mos, you may find that your kids, like mine, are absolutely delighted to come home. And you may find, in time, the house not as hateful if you leave DickheadHusband behind.

However, if you really can't face that house, I would still use it as a base to work out where you really want to be. I know you say that the Tesco's and B&B hold bad memories, but you are having those same bad thoughts when you are 10,000 miles away.

If you come back you know how the system works here. You will have friends/family for support.

There is no shame in saying it didn't work out. Regrets are for things never tried. You went full of hope and then found out a whole ream of stuff - it is your privilege to change your mind.

But please. please. please. Ditch him properly and set yourself free.

[SquinkiesRule]

Take the money use it to fly you and the kids home, then decide where you want to go from there. At least you will be on familiar ground and know what and where to go when you need anything. You wouldn't be starving and getting evicted back in UK.

[Mosman]

My wagon is unhitched - honestly it really is, I've just been trying to work out how we have 50/50 care of the children and the truth is we just can't without having permanent residency in Australia.
So my plan today is to get my old employers to pay the airfare, say thank you to the £7,000, make sure he keeps job hunting and tell the children we are off on a little holiday to see Gran.
Eventually twunt will either get PR and then I might consider going back, depending on how things are or he will have to get a job in the UK, or I guess he just never sees his kids again.

[DistanceCall]

Do you want to live in Australia for any particular reason?

[expatinscotland]

Mos, I totally get why you might want to stay in Australia. How can this be possible? It's very easy, saying 'go back home', but though we have crossed swords I get why this may not be the best course for either you or your children, so err on the side of those who try to help you to stay, tbh. And you have skills, which can mean you can. And if you can and that's what you want and what you believe is best for your children, then by all means, find any way to do so. Believe me, having been there, although not under similar circumstances, I get it. I've had people tell me, 'Go home' even now, without considering, that Scotland is my children's home, the only home they have ever known, and I have been here 11 years.

IF you think this is the best course for you and your children, then hopefully we can help you stay there.

How can you stay, if it's possible and if you want to?

[Mosman]

I left a £40,000 job to follow twat face to Australia because he'd unsuccessfully been looking for work for nearly four years, now of course he hasn't been putting in hundreds of applications but he'd done what he was prepared to do.
I keep going around and around in circles. My worry is in Australia without residency I am a) stuck with him, we cannot live separately and feed the children, this is not an exaggeration. Most Aussies gets sauce government top ups and childcare assistance which we wouldn't be entitled to and therefore the maths just doesn't work. b) Australia is heading down the same path, they've just slashed interest rates, we all know what that's the start of, projects are drying up, jobs are drying up.
I've already spent all our savings on this adventure, some of his mums savings. His dads money is literally our last chance I don't want to waste it.