DH said, DH left, waves is still being sick but into the third timester

[wavesandsmiles]

I haven't been around here for a while, as I was worried that twunt was reading MN to find out what my thoughts/plans were. He may very well still be doing that, but he's gone now, and my new mission is to reach out for as much support as possible (trying to see it as a sign of strength to ask for help rather than a sign of failure), so here I am.

Back in January DH (hitherto referred to as twunt), told me I had to fix the marriage etc, then within days I found out he'd been texting OW to say our marriage was over, researching late abortions etc. This was when I was 14 weeks pregnant. I'm now 27 weeks pregnant, and still have hyperemesis, necessitating almost daily visits to hospital for IV meds and fluids. Twunt left just over a month ago, and I now have lodgers in, which is helping with the mortgage.

I'm trying to be strong for my DCs, but at times it all gets rather overwhelming....especially as it is not really that long to go until my little acrobat makes an appearance. Before then I am on a twunt detox, and am trying to have no contact with him whatsoever. My DCs are being very good (most of the time), despite having to cope with their step dad (who planned to adopt them) just disappearing, and me being so ill all the time. But it is obviously challenging for them.

Terrified of the summer when acrobat arrives and the inevitably of facing up to a form of contact with the utter shite who left me in this predicament - our baby was wanted, and planned for. Lots of other practicalities to consider too, and considering investing in a diary so that I can put things onto paper rather than leave things spinning around in my head....

Anyway, I'm back, and hoping that there will be some virtual hands to hold as I continue to battle the hyperemesis, hormones and general challenges of the final trimester, and the impact of the not so "D" H's departure.

Oooh job news already - that's great! And relocation - I hope that its still far enough away even if its not as far as Scotland?

Wonderful news about the potential job!!

This morning I was imagining how amazing it would be if there was a crack team of mumsnetters sat in a van driving to you, to help you pack up your house and take you to your new house, your new home, your new life.

I like the sound of that crack team. I'm in!

You live and learn with lodgers. I've been doing it for years and even the best of them are usually amazingly selfish. They've never run a home so have no idea what it entails. and yes they do deal with only their own stuff - if you're lucky! - nobody else's. I think I posted up a thread on here where I asked my lodger to mow the lawn (have I posted about this on here before? ) and he vanished! For weeks! It only takes 20 minutes ffs and he was using the garden more than me. I think he thought I was his mummy or something.

Talking of which: don't be their mummy!

Sorry to hear your mum is poorly. I may sound like a bitch but be careful this isn't a ruse to make you feel guilty or whatever.

Sounds fabulous about the job. How exciting

[please tell me your timetable about acrobat's arrival was tongue-in-cheek?]

Great news that you've been approached with a potential job.

I agree with springy that you need to be careful with regard to your mum. You know what she's like. She may well milk this to get to you.

Congratulations Waves! A relocation will prevent daily hassle from twunt & TB - they will both have to be good to be allowed to visit!

Oooooo exciting re prospective job/relocation! Thrilled for you and hope it comes off, that would solve so many problems! :)

What an exciting prospect waves headhunted!

Aside from any wariness and caution in dealing with your mother, you really do have to put yourself first now, it doesn't come easy I realise .

And this afternoon I had a call in respect of 2 senior roles in Scotland [shocked] I haven't even started trying....just whacked my CV on a site.

Bloomin BH playing up something rotten this evening. Saw mum this morning, and she is still at the hospital now, but was insistent she was coming out at some stage today. Trying to remain arm's length etc, but as usual it is back to me being the one doing the running around, as DSis lives away.

Springy - I am definitely living and learning lodger wise. It is an education in personality types if nothing else. And I actually wasn't tongue in cheek re the timetable for acrobat's arrival. If he arrives outside of the preferred times I will either be playing at a wedding with a day or so old baby, or playing at a wedding whilst in labour. Neither of which is particularly good. (I did tell the B&Gs (2 weddings) when my due date was but they were so desperate for me to play they said go ahead and we will all keep fingers crossed you are still in action) Gah!

Not too good at putting me first today After visiting mum, I rushed home to get DC's tea prepped, then had an appointment, then spring cleaned the kitchen, then had a quick sit down before shooting off to school for DD's year 2 leavers' assembly, then been at home entertaining them, tea etc. Tomorrow I will try harder.

Come to Scotland Waves we are luvly luvly people up here--and we can spot your twunt from a mile off and scare him off with our kilts and haggis. PS and it's miles away from your mother

Beginning to think waves is a prettier version of the Roadrunner, beep beep zoom zoom!

Some things are just meant to be....

Wonderful news about the offers of jobs waves. Not only for practical reasons such as money! But also to boost your confidence.

I don't know what you do for a living, but you often mention music and playing instruments. Have you thought of setting up a music / workshop business.

Have a look at Atarah Ben Tovim's web site, she holds flute workshops at her home. Maybe something like that would work for you also?

Hope you start to take all these cries of REST seriously, also that you get some rest tonight.

see? we said it would all come together and it is!

YES to the jobs, YES to relocation and YES, I am IN - but I dont want to be called a crack team if thats ok. I have visions of hairy arses builder stylee and the other 'crack' is drugs... Can we not be called something else please?

Waves - slow down! just a little bit please.

Although I admire your inner strength so much.

at crack refusal. Feel free to come up with a better name!!

I maybe watch too much 24 and CSI .

It's all coming together that's for sure!

Hope you're having a good day waves .

What's the betting she's spent the day mowing the lawn, weeding, sowing veg, harvesting wheat the old fashioned way, taken the armchair to the tip, cooked six months' worth of meals for all of them including lodgers, put out two forest fires in Colorado (she flew using ARM Power - otherwise known as flapping), performed an emergency tracheotomy at the side of the road on her way back and had a chat with a man about a job ..... Also made cakes for a school cake sale.

Hope all is well, waves.

I've had a busy day Major garden works including emptying the rather enormous paddling pool, scrubbing it, and now getting it refilled ready for the promised heat wave. Spring cleaned more of the house, and now off to pick DS up from a free "try golf" thing, before dashing off to school fair with both DCs after which I have to get myself ready for a gig.

Sorry to disappoint but there have been no forest fires to tackle or emergency tracheotomies.

Tired out - still so many braxton hicks, so just hoping that 10th July and my relatively quiet spell calendar wise heralds an arrival. Otherwise I will have to insist that Acrobat stays put until around 29 July.

Maybe I can be a bit quieter tomorrow?

I will be most upset if we are not the first to know when waves goes into labour.

X post!

That, btw, is NOT resting!

Goodness yes, priorities Beryl .

I was going to add, maintaining Centre Court in tip top condition and painting the nursery for the Royal baby! A spot of light work after all the rest.

I think Donkeys is spot on - you are like the Roadrunner, waves!
...not surprised you are a little tired!

July 9th - have tinned rhubarb and custard for tea.
July 10th - have same again for breakfast.
July 10th afternoon - have Baby Acrobat by tea time.

.

I like the full stop after your grin, Strawberry . Kind of emphatic.

MEEP MEEP

Now let's see - there's dashing, scrubbing, running, wacked (CV), shooting off. And that's just on this page.

You should've been a player, waves . You would've finished anybody off who dared stand on the other side of the court.

Couldn't you just play the recorder energetically??

But I think it looks messy with the full stop now.