can't sleep won't sleep 3

[KittyAndTheFontanelles]

over hear night owls . Unless we are somewhere else

It's not that I've always hated hospitals but having been THE community midwife for so long I kinda feel like having a baby in hospital is kinda weird now! Although of course I do prefer women to have eclamptic fits there rather than on the living room floor! With a DrCafe around with her trusty cannula & magnesium sulphate (anaesthetics cafe?!)
But I'm super slick at catching babies so all will be well!

I'm driving down from Newcastle on Tyne to south west worcs so sporadic self absorbed posts at services only sorry!!

Oh god now have a image of midwife practeing her catching via the tennis court manchine thingy safe travels

Mrs Shrek no sleep till after 2am as dp was snorning and trying to do star shapes in the bed grr poor dp just woke im up and hes running a temp running nose and coughing poor sexy man is poorrlyy anyway must dash as being called into work 5-10 shift ugh

But on the postive side got asked again if defo intrested if a full time job came up said yes and i was going to make choc kriespes tonight for the team have to be monday now

Are you a Geordie themidwife?

Wotcha doin in wusster? Yes, safe journey, long way that

Kitty we shall have to be on best behaviour if she is coming our way. She will be wearing baseball hat and large glove for catching babies.
Queuing for choc krispies.

Stands next to kitty in line turns head to left lifts left arm up hand in fist shuffles away from Kitty till fist is bearly touching Kittys shoudlers moves arm to side moves head to front goes into "stand easy" postion .... doesnt make a sound !!

(Go on goggle it you know you want too )

Has voulterned Kitty to be right marker and as such you dress from the left :)

Right not left of ffs should i just get marched off to jail now

Why aye everyone!! Actually I live near the Malvern Hills in the Land of Worcs but my Dad's side of the family are Geordies so I went up to visit my aunt & cousins! Love it up there!!
Now home - delighted to find the house a complete tip & have just spent 2 hours cleaning!

Right now I've finished OCDing I have got my glove & hat on! Push Kitty Push!!

Midwife welcome home

You do a bit of cheer leading. Get the Pom poms out.

Mini you want me to scratch my head again, this thread will make me bald me thinks.

Pompoms Ra Ra, and all that. It's encouraging doncha know. Seen on every labour ward.Do keep up dad. < just pulling your leg>

you are very norty mini, by the way why do you call yourself minimammoth if you dont mind me asking oxymorons always intrigue me

Steady on chaps- I'm bor even pregnant yet!

Erm not, not bor

Yes prob best not to push yet then!!

Hello everyone! Have finished cleaning & making sure DH's service & MOT history is up to date. I read him some of last night's posts & he says that you are all expert bloggers & he can imagine this thread being made into a Tim Burton film, being so surreal an all!!

Midwife do you always do that, asking women to push well ahead of time , makes me smile really

Actually, it's weird but women generally either say "I need to push" or "Can I push?". I never tell them to in real life. I just say "if you feel like it, it's up to you"!

you learn something new every day

got told not to for #2&3 of mine. catchers mitt

Why not?