So after 14 years together, 12 years married and 3 dcs he lobs this out of left field ...

[SimoneDeBeaver]

He'll be back late because he's going to a Freemason's dinner.

God I don't even know which bloody emoticon to put, as I don't know whether to laugh hysterically, cry or blow up.

This is a man who has always been fun, kind, thoughtful, supportive, dare I say it, a feminist. And he cannot seem to understand why this has left me feeling extremely unnerved. (mainly because I'm not sure what it is and why it is)

I mean, what do they DO? I know they do lots of charidee work, but we already give all we can afford, volunteer a lot, involved in church ... I mean, FTLOG why does he need to join what seems to me a misogynist, secretive, frankly rather silly old-boys club?

Aaaaargh!!

bitdifferent but why should you have to do a speech if women aren't invited to join the club and you can't know anything about it?

I'd shove the gifts up their arse. Your husband pays for your gift through his memebership fees. He could just not go and buy you one instead!

Well exactly DrH.

If DH was ever Head Lobster or whatever and I had to go to the ladeez night I would choose vibrators for the gifts.

fab cross-post

There are different levels of Freemasons. They seem to rule the world at the highest levels.
Judges, politicians, business leaders, doctors, police, teachers, lawyers all have many Freemasons amongst them.
They swear allegiance to each other above all else, including the law.
They never work for the greatest good, but only for their own good.
Their ceremonies are basically black magic and devil worship, though many of them will have no idea that that is what they are doing.
It is often them who are involved in abuse and the cover up of abuse, ie Bryn Estyn, Haute de Garonne, Dunblane massacre.
Sorry, I don't mean to infer that your DH will become an abuser.

My BIL goes its sounds like a boys club he tried to get my DH to join and I went mental.

Oh and it has a really expensive annual fee to be a member.

I think my tactics may be the same as used for dcs. If I ignore he may well lose interest.

^"Their ceremonies are basically black magic and devil worship, though many of them will have no idea that that is what they are doing.
It is often them who are involved in abuse and the cover up of abuse, ie Bryn Estyn, Haute de Garonne, Dunblane massacre. "^

Any proof of that?

OP, you could join the Eastern Star, doubt it would be nearly as 'interesting' though.

again Farbetter you've pinpointed another niggle. If all they do is good works, why does it all have to be so secret? Because of course really it's to do good works for each other.

Ok, your opinion I'll leave it. I'll buy whatever food mixer I like, my Dh doesn't buy me household goods, it was a joke. Just saying it isn 't that weird and mysterious. There are a lot of events over the year for the whole family it's just the organising bit that's men only. My daughters go to Rainbows, Brownies and Guides. No boys there.

Yes, I did say to my colleague about all the dodgy deals etc and he was like "nah, nah, no dodgy deals". Eh maybe not in his eyes but if they all put each other first (which they do) then it is a dodgy deal.

The subject of Freemasons interests me and annoyes me equally. I just want to know the secrets!

simone can you see your husband going through the initiation and revising the ritual books so he knows them off by heart?

and we really really can't afford an expensive sub.

Long chat needed I think. Not interested in all the stupid secret ceremonies but want him to be a sceptic and smell the bullshit if it's there.

Oh bit slow posting. Don't think my religious DH does black magic, nor is he involved in any abuse or law breaking. Hmm must go and read his little book.

DrH he hasn't managed to finish a book for months because he has so much to read for work, so i can't see him managing to learn their booky wooky.

And he can think again if he wants to take more time away from me and the dcs to do it.

They are asked when joining if they have their partner's full support.

simone good idea re. vibrators for gifts. Sounds like some of the wives need a good orgasm.

Bitdifferent I don't think any one was having a go. And certainly not suggesting that all freemasons abuse their position.

bitdifferent so why does he go? What does he get out of it?

LineRunner - interesting.

my dads one. he's lovely and not sexist. he does it for the friendship I think

I've read the book too, no black magic or devil worshipping Im afraid.

Pmsl at intellectual club!

That's good that is.

Archetype - this thread is maybe a bit flippant and I'm sure there are lovely, kind and non-sexist freemasons.

But DH is all those things and has about 200 friends so I don't understand why he feels the need to join this particular club ...

Maybe he wants to know the secrets as well.

So to summarise, we think a boys' drinking club but very ritualised, expensive and at the top levels very influential.

How can judges make vows of allegiance above the law?

TO be fair, i'd join if i could. Just want to know the secrets because i'm nosy