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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Dating chat thread! Number 47

999 replies

lubeybooby · 20/03/2013 19:43

Here we go again folks, all dating related chit chat here.

OP posts:
ike1 · 20/03/2013 22:40

Dont ask, tell.

ClippedPhoenix · 20/03/2013 22:41

Thanks all.

Don't worry I've used dating sites for years. So know the score and have a skin like a buffalo Grin

Just wanted to know what sites are good these days.

Will give OK Cupid a go too seeings as its free.

48howdidthathappen · 20/03/2013 22:43

OWW A long, long, sexless weekend. 4 days!!!!! No chance this weekend either. We both have too much on.

Yes. The arm waving place.

I feel very seasonal Grin

WarmFuzzyFun · 20/03/2013 22:43

They are all a 'good' as each other, of course I have a bias Match is best avoided, allegedly Grin

Scrazy · 20/03/2013 22:44

Velvet, I would also second, don't say anything to him now wait until tomorrow. He is telling you that he is messing you around and he is. It reiterates the saying 'people tell you who they are'. I know you liked him and it must be hard to take but you need someone who won't mess you around.

ike1 · 20/03/2013 22:58

Its a broad church that athletic description isnt it?

KirstyWirsty · 20/03/2013 23:05

ike I think a lot of men think athletic means that if they own a pair of trainers then that's them Hmm

ike1 · 20/03/2013 23:09

Yep! Think you might be right there Kirst....pic of a pretty enormous bloke in Maccy D's ....athletic apparently. Well, well...

JulietteMontague · 20/03/2013 23:10

Velvet you have done patient, you need to know what is going on with him so I second Lubeys suggestion, no explanations, feelings etc, just about meeting up tomorrow, Sunday etc. Nothing to loose at all.

48howdidthathappen · 20/03/2013 23:10

Or watching footy on Sky.

JulietteMontague · 20/03/2013 23:12

Where is Bants loo update? This could be a good sign Grin

Clipped any of them, except MatchAffinity, Match or e-disharmony. I like okc as it's a bit more alternative and friendly but it depends where you live apparently.

VelvetSpoon · 20/03/2013 23:13

I've sent C something. I couldn't condense any of my actual thoughts onto paper so I've gone for the can we meet tomorrow idea instead. In the hope that he says yes, and that I can actually manage to verbalise said thoughts by then.

Thanks so much all of you for your kind and thoughtful advice tonight, I may not take all of it because I'm irritating like that, but it is v much appreciated nonetheless :)

lubeybooby · 20/03/2013 23:32

It's ok velvet there tends to be a lot of conflicting advice as well... hope he pulls his finger out. Keep us posted and keep that chin up... don't let anything spoil how brill your work day was!

OP posts:
JulietteMontague · 20/03/2013 23:36

Velvet keep meaning to say congrats on your work stuff today! Grin

VelvetSpoon · 20/03/2013 23:51

Thanks - the work stuff is keeping me going! That and some harmless flirting with the guy from school who's on my FB...

C can't do tomorrow, youngest DC's parents evening. I have checked, and it is true. I've suggested he should come up with an alternative. look at me getting all bolshy!

JulietteMontague · 20/03/2013 23:53

Go velvet Grin

VelvetSpoon · 20/03/2013 23:56

My god, he has now actually sent me a flirty text. C that is. First one ever Shock

Maybe I should be bolshy with him more often?!!

I am not sure I will ever work men out...

ike1 · 20/03/2013 23:58

Velv...what the????????????

JulietteMontague · 21/03/2013 00:00

Ok so he's woken upGrin
Name the day C, name the day.

ike1 · 21/03/2013 00:01

No Velv....nor me....

lubeybooby · 21/03/2013 00:21

eeeexcellent velv... Wink

OP posts:
WarmFuzzyFun · 21/03/2013 08:06

Told you '{Some} Men are strange creatures...'

48howdidthathappen · 21/03/2013 08:53

Woo hoo Velvet Smile

Snapespeare · 21/03/2013 09:23

Velvet what's he playing at? Hmm His texts read (paraphrase)

  1. I'm rubbish, aren't I? you'd be far better off without me being sporadically communicative and never making an effort to even grab a coffee with you bearing in mind we live so close to each other. you'd best dump me?.
  2. flirty flirty flirty flirt.

he's a head-fuck. he's blowing cold and hot. I know you have this 2nd-date cherry mindset and I know you like him, but you deserve to be treated with honest communication and respect and I'm not seeing any of that. I'm seeing either someone with an over-inflated opinion of themselves who likes keeping a variety of women dangling because it feeds his ego, who is calculatingly applying a hot/cold to keep you interested. or someone who is just a twat.

in summary: he's an idiot. you are a young leopard print clad Jackie Collins. If I were you I'd get back on dating sites toot sweetie - especially the ones you know he frequents.

OhWesternWind · 21/03/2013 09:42

Got huge butterflies/nerves about seeing LM tonight. Sense of impending dooooooom and it's not even Winedoom. He's been good with phoning but seems to have totally abandoned replying to any texts which is unsettling me. It's over a week since I last saw him, nearly two since we had the chance to go to bed.

I'm feeling very sidelined and pushed out, low down on his list of priorities. I know his children will always come first, but i cant see why we cant see each other when he has his children, either all together kids and all or stopping in. Or he could get a babysitter like I have to. And he is making time to see his sodding Little Friend over Easter but no plans with me so far. Just feeling a bit frustrated, I know he's been hugely busy with his shop, which I do understand. Just letting off steam a bit.

Maybe I should be a bit more high maintenance and demanding like his friend (and his mum) but its really not me, plus I think he has enough demanding women in his life.

Part of me thinks tell him, part of me thinks this isn't a good time for that kind of conversation and to leave it a while. Advice please!

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