No I don,t want to sleep with your husband

[bongobaby]

Apparently its ok by his wife that he is asking to sleep with me WTF I am so fucking angry. NO NO NO its not going to happen I,m pissed off bigtime at the pair of them.

Rather oddly, I never expect to have a laugh on the Relationships boards. Who knew?

FWIW, I think the couple are in the wrong here, to a point. You don't involve friends unless they are a couple and you are propositioning them for a swap. That's normal (in terms of etiquette) though not sure if Debretts have a chapter or not on this stuff?

In this case, not a good idea to proposition a single mum who is already a 'mate' - that constitutes shitting in your own bed and I don't know any swingers that would do that not that I know many swingers, these days....

But, the hysterical reaction to it all is just that. Hysterical (apologies to feminists for use of a misogynistic word, but can't think of a better one). It's not your bag, fine. It upsets you, fine. Coming on here and sounding off about people whose cultural boundaries are different from yours is offensive.

If you want empathy, you probably need to start showing some yourself.

though not sure if Debretts have a chapter or not on this stuff?

Bwaaa-haaa.. I definitely think MN should petition for one though eh??!

OP I do have sympathy for you. I think your head is full of romantic notions of charming princes and you want a bit of love and affection not to mention a shag and instead you get swinger boy offering himself on a plate... I partly see why you're disillusioned but you have to see how you've overreacted. At least he was open. At least you know (though nobody actually does know in this case) that his wife knew about it, and it's still more honest than the hypocricy of people in supposedly monogomous relationships shagging rings around them (see other threads on this board).

Don't expect this to be the last married man who propositions you, only in most cases, the wife won't know!

I was thinking it came under the heading of 'unwanted sexual harrassment'.

Do you think an unwanted sexual advance is a criminal offence?

I would have thought it was only unwanted sexual harassment if he knew it was unwanted? If he'd carried on after then yes but is just asking the question sexual harassment? Genuine question.