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Original poster

No I don,t want to sleep with your husband

204 replies

bongobaby · 22/01/2013 17:15

Apparently its ok by his wife that he is asking to sleep with me WTF I am so fucking angry. NO NO NO its not going to happen I,m pissed off bigtime at the pair of them.

OP posts:
hopkinette · 23/01/2013 16:33

There's a real lady-doth-protest-too-much vibe going on here. Are you curious about sleeping with him, OP? You can do it if you want to, you know :)

loopylou6 · 23/01/2013 16:35

Are you the friends husband hop? You seem awfully keen to Convince OP to sleep with this bloke Hmm

hopkinette · 23/01/2013 16:36

if you have a gay friend, are you supposed to come out and tell them straight away that you don't want sex with them because you are straight?

If their propositioning you is going to cause you to sob for hours and feel threatened then yes, perhaps you should consider it.

bongobaby · 23/01/2013 16:38

This reply has been deleted

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hopkinette · 23/01/2013 16:38

Where am I trying to convince her to sleep with him? More than anything, I think she should get a grip. People mentioning sexual intercourse occasionally happens and most normal people manage to take it in their stride.
OP's going on and on and on and on and on about this... It makes me think she's secretly interested.

Bogeyface · 23/01/2013 16:40

Nobody said its normal, nobody said you should do it, nobody said that you shouldnt feel that the friendship cant continue. What HAS been said is that you're reaction is totally out of proportion.

Just because YOU feel that they shouldnt do this doesnt mean that you have the right to call them both some frankly vile names, and imply that they are somehow deviants. They like something you dont, and asked you if you would like to partake. You said no, end of discussion.

And as for insulting anyone on here who doesnt agree with you, its not the best way to garner sympathy at all.

Bogeyface · 23/01/2013 16:41

This reply has been deleted

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hopkinette · 23/01/2013 16:41

I'm on planet Earth, just like you and everyone else on this thread. The fact that I take a slightly different view on something which is, in the grand scheme of things, fairly trivial, does not in fact indicate that I am an alien. I'm not even slightly interested in swinging - in fact at the moment I'm not interested in sleeping with anyone at all. I just think that weeping because someone asks you if you'd be interested in sleeping with them is a bit of an over the top reaction.

ShephardsDelight · 23/01/2013 16:41

I agree its a bit creepy, but I do think your reaction is slightly OTT, as long as he didn't try to grope your or anything.

Habble · 23/01/2013 16:42

bogeyface said it much more succinctly than me Blush

Original poster
bongobaby · 23/01/2013 16:44

Asking me to sleep with you even though married is totally uncalled for.

OP posts:
hopkinette · 23/01/2013 16:47

Well, actually, if you're into sleeping with people other than your spouse, then asking other people to sleep with you is explicitly called-for.

ExpatAl · 23/01/2013 16:47

I would not like the husband to say this to me when I was alone in my house with him but I would not find myself in this position. I think the OP is protesting too much. Or missing out some of the story.

MissyMooandherBeaverofSteel · 23/01/2013 16:48

How nasty is that bongo you ask for opinions, get one different from yours then insult the poster.

You sound like you like the drama you are putting onto this situation so you are probably best left to it.

Original poster
bongobaby · 23/01/2013 17:11

How do you know you won,t find yourself in that position? No missing part of the story.

OP posts:
SolidGoldBrass · 23/01/2013 17:15

I've had loads of group sex. I like it. But if someone I don't feel attracted to asks me if I want to have sex with him (or her, or even them) I say no and move along. Nothing the OP has posted suggests that this man touched her, kissed her, pressurized her or did anything other than ask - and then accept a refusal.

So this screaming tantrum and the abuse thrown at those who reject monogamy is very out of proportion.

ExpatAl · 23/01/2013 17:17

If I felt so strongly about swingers that I had to have a rant about the outrage of being propositioned I would not have the husband round to 'talk'. I would have at least had it in mind that something could happen. This bluster doesn't ring true to me.

Helltotheno · 23/01/2013 17:24

Asking me to sleep with you even though married is totally uncalled for

Well it happened all the time to me and my friends in our single days. Surely this isn't the first time you've been propositioned by a married man, forgetting totally about the swinging bit? Really?

Original poster
bongobaby · 23/01/2013 18:03

I don,t feel strongly about/against swingers don,t know where you get this from. why would I of at least had it in mind at all. he was coming to talk about me and his wife falling out nothing else. Not getting this bluster doesn,t ring true.

OP posts:
Original poster
bongobaby · 23/01/2013 18:10

Imagine the ramifications if this was to go ahead. How is it classed? cheating. im going to be a Homewrecker, if the wife gets the hump later on down the line, She could completly go this way.

OP posts:
Stropzilla · 23/01/2013 18:11

Maybe people think you have something against it for saying "weird fantasy", "that shit", "nasty" and "weird sex life" all in the first 2 pages? Does give that impression.

MissyMooandherBeaverofSteel · 23/01/2013 18:12

I thought it wasn't going to go ahead because you said no. Are you reconsidering now, you seem to have put a lot of thought into it.

Helltotheno · 23/01/2013 18:12

the death penalty i imagine Hmm

Bogeyface · 23/01/2013 18:20

You know what? I am beginning to think that you think far too much of yourself. He asked you because he fancied a shag, they are not monogamous and he knows you. I daresay they have asked every other aquaintance of theirs too!

BelaLugosisShed · 23/01/2013 18:27

Actually, I would feel absolutely violated if a man I knew came to my house and proceeded to ask me to have sex with him when there had been no previous "chemistry", no flirting and more importantly - if I was friends with his wife.

I thought even swingers had some standards, i.e. no shitting on your own doorstep, no involvement of friends etc.?

He sounds like a nasty, manipulating SOAB.