Bacon sarnies in suspenders, jacket strokers, coffee with a small 'c' and LOTS of Coffee with a capital 'C' it's dating thread 32

[lulubellaboozle]

Thought I take the liberty of starting us off again ...

Yeah Juliette that is exactly how I process it. Infact I had a conversation with my son the other day, he is 8yrs. I said I did not like the fact that she is so important to him cos I wanna be the main mum but I am happy that he enjoys her company and she is kind to him and therefore that makes me ok with it. We ended up laughing because he said 'yeah you just want some people on your side' and, well, thats kind of right...out of the mouths of babes..

Mmmm its very sad about all the lovely grandparents that never got to see their grandchildren but I am sure you share your happy memories with then OWW and Velvet.

Oh I hung up my goal duties a couple of years ago after (yet another) goal related injury. I used to refer to it rather as target practice .

I have had, at various times 1 x broken finger, 1 x broken other hand, 1 x proper black eye, 2 x permanent scars on my nose, a fat lip, several years of push bike injuries, grazes, pulled things, cricket ball bruises, and a quite outstanding number of sailing bruises. Sport, is not my strong point

LOL Juliette, you and me both! I spent the summer trying to play tennis with my 9 yo DS and he regularly kicked my ass 6-1, 6-1!

I hope nobody minds but I'm delurking for a cathartic and self-indulgent whinge which may well degenerate into me curling up into a foetal ball, rocking back and forth and wailing like Kate Bush on helium.

I've been in touch with two men via OD, one, Science Bloke, nice enough, nerdy - phwoarrrrrr, bit too free with exclamation marks but I'm trying not to be too picky, plenty of flirty texting etc then the git disappears. But that's ok because Talent Show Man is still plugging away with his extravagant compliments ( he's a bit skinny, spelling slightly haphazard, sent me a photo with a genital component 'accidentally' creeping into the frame ). Then this morning Talent Show sends me an email telling me that he's met someone at work. I was relying on these two to flirt relentlessly with me over Christmas, thus distracting me from moping around over The Love of My Life , Mr Maris Piper, first class wanker and full time arseface.
No-one will ever love me again. I will never have Coffee again. This is rubbish.

Ok, thanks for that and may I just say that you all seem like really lovely people who deserve lots of happiness. And Coffee.

MsArse what you've described seems to me like a typical slice of online dating...most of it is 'fun banter' which fizzles out
sure you can easily find another gaggle of blokes to flirt you through xmas

Hey biscuit just have another look through your OD site .. There will be fresh meat to flirt with on there

Team night out tomorrow night .. Mr Cheeky continues to be lovely .. Meeting him for Coffee at the end of the night

Thanks Mercury, that's the way I've viewed it all too so far, it just seems rather inconvenient that it's all petered out in one go, leaving me gazing into my empty Coffee mug and weeping over Mr Maris Piper yet again.

Kirsty, I've a message from Mr Emergency Stop that I have to reply to yet but he's not said anything remotely funny so far and I can't build up any flirty enthusiasm. Have a marvellous time with Mr Cheeky.

Hi Biscuit

wail away - are you doing high-pitched 'Heathcliff' or 'running up that hill'?

How long did Science Bloke disappear for? One person's perception of 'disappearing' may be another persons 'been a bit busy' - more than a couple of days is a bad sign though without forewarning.

I read somewhere that extravagant compliments may be a red flag, and how exactly does a genital component (one for the next thread title there I think) 'accidentally' creep into the frame? Sounds a bit weird to me.

I think I've come to live the phrase 'Rather be single than settle' via online dating. Christmas with no one to flirt with apart from a stalker who's one step away from mailing me locks of her hair is depressing, but better than waking up tied to the bed with a Kathy Bates wannabe getting ready to hobble my legs.

I was mailing some girl last night, lives near me, really attractive (although only in the one picture) and she was possibly really very very drunk as she was bemoaning the fact her life had sunk to the level of having to do online dating and meeting cyber people - so negatively I felt quite insulted by her. Then she took the piss out of my photo. And I thought - 'well, you're proving your own point, sweetheart - if you're this rude to people online of course you get treated shittily' Part of me wants to see whether she can be nice when sober, another part of me wants to block/delete. But attractive, funny, intelligent women near me are few and far between, it seems so I'll probably give her the benefit of the doubt and see if she was just having a bad night.

By the way Biscuit I do like your nicknames for people. Where does Mr Maris Piper come from again?

'gazing into my empty Coffee mug and weeping over Mr Maris Piper yet again'
there there, it'll fade, we've all been there:)

I rather pictured myself with a Wuthering Heights-stylee wailing, Banta, obviously the actual effect may be more Sideshow Bob than doe-eyed Kate Bush.

Science Bloke hasn't texted for around a week, I think, which is a shame as apart from excessive exclamation mark usage, he was a likely candidate for possible Coffee - he lives reasonably close, does Science and is originally from the same part of the country as me.

Talent Show Man sent me a photo that he took whilst bathing and Something ( which despite my extensive anatomical knowledge I was unable to positively identify as either frank OR beans but was definitely one of the two ) had floated into the frame.

Mr Maris Piper is very fond of potatoes ( not a euphemism ).

I have to say that the person you were talking to last night, Banta, sounds really rather discourteous and immature, presumably she'll end up with one of the very many knobbers that inhabit the OD world.

MsA - you've made me smile so thank you! Get busy online tonight and you'll be able to rustle up another couple of hopefuls no problem.

Banta - you are incorrigible. Was it gently taking the piss or proper meanness?

Kirsty - have a great night tomorrow!

Mercury, I think one of the great strengths of this thread is that it helps us all to realise that we all go through the same crappy feelings from time to time, I know that lurking and reading has made me feel better.

you're right biscuit - she did. But she was Very Attractive. Worth at least talking to again to work out if she'd had a particularly bad day. I've had times when someone has messaged me and I've been shorter with them than I should have been - not downright rude but just not friendly. I'm generally friendly with anyone on line, while trying not to let them get their hopes up too much if they're just not my type.

Banta I have a very dry sense of humour sometimes which occasionally does not translate well on line ...so could be similar????

Worth a try then, Banta, and like Ike I've had the subtleties of my sense of humour not translate quite as I'd wished when I've communicated online so maybe it was that.

:) at her being 'very attractive' and therefore worth a second go despite lack of basic manners. yep, just go back for more surly interaction bant because she's pretty.

msArse sounds about normal. am sure you can scare up another couple of xmas flirtations. :)

i had my appeal meeting this morning - went as well as can be expected. it is now my mission to get my managers job. One would think a basic understanding of HR policies would be a rudimentary requirement of working in HR. apparently not. anyway, appeal manager perfectly reasonable and actually very nice and seems to vaguely know what she is talking about. i reserve the right to retract that statement if she doesn't find in my favour. :)

Snape, from my experience of HR ( with profuse apologies to any of you who work in HR ) their staff seem to be employed solely on the ' chocolate fireguard' basis - good luck.

With your collective encouragement, I'm girding my loins for a Christmas Flirt Hunt, wish me luck, I'm going in.

nice one Snape - let us know how it works out - at least it's looking better for the new year, less to worry about for christmas.

And yes, shallow that I am I'll give someone more benefit of the doubt if I fancy their picture than if I don't really. If it was just someone I was chatting to to see if they were funny and sweet, then I'd need to find them less attractive to meet them. If they're very attractive and funny but quite snarky, I'll forgive them that the one time. I had an ex who was cynical at times, but sweet at other times, and lovely.

Fingers crossed Snape!

MsA floating body part did not happen by accident! Move on to the next one, talking to the losers will only make you feel more crappy. MN OD mantra: Chin up (or Tits Out whichever works better for you!). You deserve better. Move on.

Bant Sigh, why do you keep giving these women the benefit of the doubt? What would you tell one of us if we were talking to a really hot bloke who saw fit to be rude & take the piss the first time we talked? You would say, if he's rude now he's likely going to continue to be rude/put you down/think he's better than you. You deserve better, don't go there.

I'm feeling shitty today because DD was massively out of control last night, so much so I finally broke down and asked her dad to come over and talk to her (she was screaming, slamming doors and actually hurting me). On the plus side he's good at talking to her and did get her to calm down and listen. On the down side, before he did that I had to put up with him saying horrible things to me and putting me down in front of the children because I wasn't about to fight with him in front of them. God damn him, I fucking hate that I still have to have him in my life.

Could really do with a distraction right now but OD is soooo depresssing! What's a girl to do?

Good luck Snape, I'm afraid I've not had the best experiences with HR - fingers crossed for you.

People may or may not remember that I met history teacher twice, utter crap dates both times. No spark, not even interesting. But he kept texting me stupid crap one line messages every now and then, eg. How was your weekend? I politely told him 2 weeks ago that I wasn't interested, too busy for dating, good luck for the future etc. He replied that he'd already guessed I wasn't interested so I didn't reply. But he's texted me again, another crap one line message - I'm ok to just ignore this guy with a clear conscience now aren't I? Or should I reply and tell him plainly to stop contacting me?

In other news mr tall got drunk at his work Xmas do last night and sent me a couple of gushing texts - I really, really like him!!

I'm so shallow that I dont even reply if I dont find the profile pic attractive, any hint of rudeness or sarcasm from him and I'm off.

I'm often a bit sarcastic, I use it as a sort of test, if he takes it well and gives me the benefit of the doubt then I'll warm to him, if he gets offended easily I'm off.
Yep, I know double standards in spades

I'm often surprised at how much sarcasm and lack of manners from me blokes on dating sites will put up with...

Yoga - how old is your dd? Mine is 10 and I have had so much rude, foul and generally horrible behaviour off her the past few weeks that I am at the end of my tether and just feel like crying when she starts it. It can be soul destroying. I have had her hitting me, pushing me out of rooms etc and it can be so difficult to stay calm and in control. No advice to offer, really, as I am struggling too, but I can offer sympathy and understanding if that will do at all.

Pixie - no need to respond again to someone you've already brushed off, unless he's annoying you in which case tell him very plainly not to contact you again. Sounds good with Mr Tall - what was he saying last night?