Wickaninnish - I take your point about over-thinking things.
To be honest, that is what I do - but in a controlled way.
Years ago, I learnt to go with my natural "style" which is one of kicking an issue around until every single known strand has been explored. I am at my best when I am bouncing stuff off people - I could never survive on my own as a single practitioner or self-starter.
It has been my good fortune to surround myself with fantastic people with whom I operate, working off their strengths. We are extremely diligent in shaking out every sliver of information, every clue and every cue - so that when we get involved with anybody we have the best information possible, with a view to avoiding avoidable mistakes.
At home, my wife and I were somewhat similar in that we would discuss an issue ad nauseam - and would then be fairly comfortable that we had covered most of the "known knowns".
With regard to Widow, I cannot really discuss this with anybody - and so, I am using this thread as my bouncing wall. It is probably a bit wearisome for people skipping through my posts - because my story does not have the same pace as most peoples'. But I am very grateful for the feedback - and would not have believed how affirming it can be.
As for swamping Widow on the emotional front, there is little likelihood of that. When my wife was here, she used to say (to the dog) "God help the poor woman that get's him when I'm gone. I'll have to come back and give her my notes". It was a running "joke" for years. Little did either of us know that it would come to pass.
In real life, while I am naturally warm and lighthearted, I can be a hard read. My daughters get me completely - but, I might be hard enough work for somebody else.
Also, lulubella, you are very perceptive to spot that Widow could easily have excluded me from her responses. I don't think that is over-thinking at all - it is a strand of information that forms part of the mosaic. In truth, I take a lot of encouragement from that single cue - and thanks for highlighting it.
P.S.
Of course, I am not suggesting that experience of dealing with business issues can be used in deciding the best approach to a fair lady.
Ah no! - business is easy (well, the male-dominated part anyway).