Kissing

[Dadslib]

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DL - Going to be blunt here..... why would you want to have sex with someone that has so many rules about it!?? How can you really relax and enjoy it if you are constantly thinking that she hates your body and that you mustn't sweat!??

what is Mrs Dl's opinion and solution to this?

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Tinker - I certainly can't snog someone I don't fancy either! But that has no relation to the fact that DH and I just aren't really into snogging all that much.... much the same as some people aren't into holding hands all the time or twiddling with each others hair.

DH and I a very big on holding hands and cuddling and tickling each other and lots of other forms of closeness..... just not that messy business that is snogging.

DL - Do you still fancy your DW?

Oh Dl I think your relationship sounds very hard work.

whya re you both still bothering? Is it Ds?

Why the boob thing> Is she bf still?

are you sure she isnt having an affair?

.... actually can I butt in again and say that I don't like my breasts being touched either...

...honest I'm NOT DL's wife!

Just they aren't very sensitive and certainly are not an erogenous zone. DH can squeeze away if he wants to, but it really is for his own benefit and he knows it doesn nowt for me...

blush

I had thought of that too Coddy... glad you mentioned it first.
Could she be playing away??

LOl we can rename you Mrs Dl

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sorry Dl but I think there is something very fishy (!) going on here.

Have you ever looked at her mobile phone?

DL - Aren't you at work all day????? Sorry.... don't want to rouse your suspicions.

I hope you don't talk to her about the Spaniels Ears effect!!!!!!!! I wouldn't let you near me if that was the case!

DL - Sorry again to say this, but think she is making up quite elaborate excuses to NOT have sexual contact with you. It certainly sounds like excuses rather than real issues.

she could just be a very non sexual being, just cos she isn't constantly jumping on dl doesn't mean that she is having an affair.

but back to an earlier point, do you want to spend the rest of your life like this?

But i think L that they used to - other wise they wouldnt hav got otgether.

I tell you Dl look at the phone.. ( and I KNOW)

DL - do you go out of your way to make her feel like a woman. Do you cook dinner, light candles, arrange a babysitter as a suprise, run her a bath, light candles, give her a night off and sort out dinner and ds yourself to give her time to pamper herself to get her in the mood. This is what I wish my dh would do for me, if he did I know I would be up for rudies alot more than I am now. As it is now I cook and sort out ds mostly and do housework etc, then at the end of the night dh expects a shag. No niceness, no wooing, just 'show us knickers'.

I'm with M2T/Northerner on this one - DH and I only snog in the height of passion or when drunk? too messy otherwise (he is also of the snog=shag school). It suits us - we are very close in other ways (hold hands, cuddle etc)..

DL - do you think that you and DW could agree to forgo snogging - perhaps this would relieve the tension surrounding it

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many a snog in the stock room Dl - lunch times - does she come straight home or have meetings

I hope its not hte case I just dont think it all adds up

I am quite intuitive about thses things...MIl is at it

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will you look at herphone? then we can rule that out

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DL It really does sound asif you have tried so hard to no avail. Don't know what to say now. I wish my dh would try half as hard as you though.

Me too, me too!! You're not alone DL, though the responses so far would indicate it's a rare problem. SOrry, have to go incognito on my reply cos I find it quite embarrassing to admit difficulties in kissing!

DH and I used to kiss quite a lot, like all couples at the start of a relationship, but the amount of real snogging slowly diminished. I think that's fairly normal too, but I know what you're referring to is the actual enjoyment of it, not the amount. I sound like a female you. I LOVE kissing - but DH is not as into it as me. He too has thin lips and also rather a small mouth so full-on snogs don't come naturally; they require effort on my part to get his mouth to open enough to accommodate mine, euugh sorry that sounds gross!!

I love using tongues yet I think he'd be happy just with 'dry kisses', but there's NO WAY I'm having the rest of my life with no proper snogging. Because of this incompatibilty I often feel very conscious of how we're kssing when we are, hence it's not so enjoyable. Like you, I had no problem with previous partners. I remember once snogging for 40 mins non-stop with an old boyfriend and it was GREAT!

Last night we were having a cuddle on the sofa and I started kissing him and I told DH to open his mouth wider. He did, and it was really nice.

Solutions? Well, talking about it has to be the start. If you can't do that then any solutions are impossible. Personally, I find that pretending your partner is someone you don't know well, like a first snog with a boyfriend, makes the passion rise more and hence more tongue action . Find out if she's always disliked tongues or is it just with you she doesn't like it? If it's the latter then maybe reconsider your technique. If you can get her to talk about it you could maybe suggest having some 'practice sessions' of kissing, trying out different ways until you find happy medium like a less intrusive tongue yet still some, er, moisture!

If you can't talk about it and have her understand how important it is to you then I reckon it just ain't gonna improve.

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