I was abused by my GP - wish I'd reported it

[pinkbluepink]

The Jimmy Savile abuse cases have led me to re-think something that happened when I was a teenager.

I was 'abused' by my GP when I was 17 on a visit to the surgery to enquire about going on the pill. My GP asked me to undress and get on the couch so he could 'examine me' before he could recommend going on the pill. At the time I thought it odd, but then having not been in that situation before I obligingly removed my lower items of clothing and hopped onto the couch. The GP then proceeded to give me an 'internal' before returning to his desk and writing a prescription.

It was only much later when discussing going on the pill with friends that I realised what he had done to me was wrong, and even then I was too embarrassed to do anything about it.

In hindsight I wish I had reported him - how many other teenagers did he do this to?

The GP is question is probably dead now, but as a mother of teenage girls it makes me furious that someone in his position felt he was able to do this.

Not sure why I'm posting this now - just wanted to get it off my chest really. Thanks for reading.

I was not in the UK in the 80s but in another country and it was standard procedure to have an internal examination, a smear, blood pressure and a breast check every time I went for the pill prescription which was every 6 months. At that time they knew that women on the pill had a higher incidence of cervical cancer but they did not know why (HPV connection not yet confirmed). I remember asking about the internal once and was told why it was done, something about looking for fibroids and cysts I think. There was also controversy about if the pill increased risk of breast cancer so they were checking for breast lumps each time. I remember being quite shocked in the UK much later on where they prescribed with no examinations.

I grew up in Germany, and started the pill in the late 90ies. Internal exam every 6 months was standard for pill prescription then, as it is now - only difference is that now they often do a vag ultrasound too and not only manual exam.

I was a bit surprised/worried when I moved to the UK and got contraception without those regular examinations

Parsing - I don't know who the production men where. They know though. I bet there are an awful lot of men in broadcasting not sleeping well at the moment.

But really, sexual abuse was common, and probably still is. I had many, many experiences from around the age of 10/11 up until my early 30s. I'm not Helen of Troy, by the way! None of them were truly awful - I wasn't raped or anything like that - but I don't want my daughter to go through anything similar.

When I was young, I was abused by an elderly relative. It was all very minor as I was a strong willed, confident child. I didn't have a clue what it was about, but I knew I didn't like it and I stayed away from him. A couple of years back, I was at a family funeral and one of my elderly female relatives made an off the cuff comment to me about the man concerned. I didn't say anything but she knew immediately that we had a connection and she was both relived and saddened. He had almost ruined her life. It made me think about other female relatives and who else had been abused.

If we can get over the silence, maybe we can bring it to a halt.

I had the same thing, GP (male) conducted several internal and breast examinations for seemingly innocuous conditions when I was about 17. I was in care at the time, and he was well known amongst the other residents for doing unnecessary intimate examinations. He was known as 'Finger-bobs'. I always remember it was a bit odd, as he made me lie on my side and draw my legs up to my tummy, and he examined me from the rear.

I reported my concerns to a social worker at the time, but she just shrugged it off.

I wish to goodness I had made an official complaint at the time, but given the vulnerable position I was in, I didn't think I would have been believed. In hindsight, I tend to agree.

I had more intimate examinations from him than I have ever had in my entire adult life, including having 2 dc.

Bastard. He is probably dead now though.

I went on the pill in the 80's - I went to the family planning clinic. I had if I recall correctly an internal and a smear. It was by a female. I didnt
think anything odd about it

Magpie I think you're so right about getting over the silence... I had a bizarre experience once that the chiropodist (of all places!) when I was about 14. A male locum was in for the lady who usually sorted my problem feet, and he asked me to turn over in the chair so that, essentially, I was lying on my front waving my (clothed) arse in the air at him. I clearly knew this was not quite right as it has stayed with me since, and I felt so uncomfortable about it that I didn't tell my mum. I wonder what would have happened if I'd been brave enough to...

Also, when I lost my virginity I was, I think, raped. I was with my "boyfriend" of the time (a flatmate who, as it later turned out, was keen to score another virgin with me) but we had not been together long and I definitely told him I didn't "want to go all the way" (in exactly those words, which I think are fairly clear). Again, if I hadn't been so ashamed about it, maybe something would have happened to stop him doing it to other girls...

OP - isn't hindsight a wonderful thing..?

Hi Gwen - yes, all sorts of men know exactly how to abuse young women. My driving instructor told me that the other mirror he had was due to the fact that he taught deaf people how to drive and they were lip reading. That was why he had his hand on my thigh- because it was non-verbal communication. I never told my parents about that one either.

God, it's all coming out now!!

Oh and Gwen, so sorry about what happened to you. You were raped. I never went through that sort of abuse.

I went on the pill in the 80's and had an internal examination. I don't recall thinking anything of it at the time and I think it was par for the course then, though I could be wrong.

So many shocking stories !

I suppose it all comes down to proper informed consent and explanation as to why an examination is necessary.
Also 'common practice' changes: I remember not that long ago (5-10 years?) it was normal and best practice to perform a breast check at every annual HRT review. It stopped once studies showed that women knowing their own breasts were more likely to pick up early changes than some stranger who sees them once a year. Sounds obvious, but needed the studies to back it up to make it 'evidence'. I wonder whether it is all to do with a rather paternalistic view of 'Dr knows best', even as far as your body goes? Or about how drs get paid (every smear another fee, for instance - not in the UK, but in many European countries).

FWIW, I had my first pill prescription in the mid 80s in another country and as others have said, it was normal at expected to have an internal, a smear and a brest exam. I do not feel violated by this as I trusted my dr at the time.

I live in France now and from what I understand its standard to have an internal for the pill. It's also standard to have to take your clothes off - either top, bottom or both, almost every time you see a Dr and there are no gowns. I had a back X-ray and was standing in just my knickers facing a wall having to stand very, very still. Iut of the corner of my eye I could see white coats going in and out of the radiologists' room, but couldn't see if they were men or women. I felt horrific and was in floods of tears (while staying still!!) by the time it was over. The radiologists couldn't understand my problem. It's normal in their culture, but for me I felt violated.
I have also been raped by a male nurse (in Australia), not in a medical setting though.

Still normal practice in Germany - a friend of mine nearly died of shock as used to practice here. I honestly can't see why apart from that, as in USA, it is an insurance based system. Plus now all the women expect it and think that UK doctors are shoddy for not doing one!

I think the ultimate question is did you understand what was going on and why it was needed (and clearly different times and different countries have different opinions) and did you feel uncomfortable with it or were you asked to do anything that wasn't part of a normal vaginal examination. Only you can decide whether this might be something you'd like to talk through in counselling or review with a doctor that you trust.

Things were so different 30 years ago. Instant pregnancy tests weren't as widely available and a urine sample had to be sent to the lab, so maybe some doctors felt they should do an internal to make sure you weren't already pregnant before issuing the pill. Added to which, as said above, there wasn't the understanding of the importance of doctor-patient communication that there is now. This of course has nothing to do with the examples above of inappropriate intimate examinations....scant comfort to those who suffered, but hopefully it's less likely to happen now with better-informed patients and GMC advice about chaperones.

So many stories - thank you everyone for your replies. It seems that in the 70's and 80's GPs abused their positions on many counts (as well as celebrities).

Magpie you didn't hijack my thread!! I'm glad you shared your story.

Similar to you OP with two different GPs. First one I reported 15 yrs on and he was prosecuted and found guilty, second one I didn't tell anyone but around the same time he was prosecuted for dozens of sexual assaults on his patients. There were a wave of cases. I'm guessing that there were a lot of dirty doctors around in the 80s and we are still seeing the fall out.

Due to previous abuse, I have always requested female doctors for anything personal like contraception, smears, internals, sti exam etc. Sorry for all the horrible stories on here :(

I was a young and naive police woman and had to have a lump removed from my breast.

Several weeks after the operation and I was back at work the old and creepy police force doctor came to see how I was. He took me in to the medical room and made me take off my shirt and bra. He looked at me. It was only several years later I realised how unnecessary and wrong it was. Filthy bastard.

To be honest in those days I wouldn't have been listened to anyway, in those circumstances.

The fact still remains that I and many posters on this thread have shared a similar experience in the hands of a male GP. Read back at longtrainrunning's post and tell me that it was correct and necessary for her GP to ask her to squeeze his finger with her pelvic floor and then make a crass comment.

Crass comments and poor bedside manner or communication skills may well have been more common in GPs in the 1970's or 80's. This was before such things were part of medical training. And no doubt there were also some rotten apples, much the same as in other professions. The point the post above is making though is an important one : the fact that the GP did an internal before prescribing the pill was not a wrong thing at the time. It was the expected practice at that time. Times change, however.

Slightly differently, I went to get the pill in the late eighties and my GP did a smear, despite me making clear that at the time I hadn't yet had sex. I did consent to it, but i was seventeen and I fainted when he inserted the speculum. It has only recently dawned on me that actually i think he shouldn't have done that.

I am reasonably sure that my early 1990's family planning textbook advised that before prescribing any hormonal contraception the doctor should check weight, do a breast exam, do a pelvic examination and take a smear . Not every doctor chose to follow these guidelines, but those who did were not wrong to do so . They would probably have criticised other doctors for not doing so. The guidelines changed, though. Guidelines do change and evolve with the times. I'm guessing mid-1990s when I did my obs/gynae diploma .

I agree with quietlysuggests post. A lot of these exams were not done by perverts - they were Drs doing what was considered good practice in those days. It's really unhelpful to women and Drs to imply that all intimate exams give the Drs a thrill

I also had an internal but it was when I got the second prescription for the pill, and it was a smear test. I would have been 17 I think. The doctor was female and also did the 'knees to chest lying on your side' thing which I found very uncomfortable and odd - but clearly no abuse was happening. Just adding to the experiences not making any points.

I was however groped by a hospital consultant who fondled my breasts while 'checking my heartbeat'. He looked me in the eye the whole time, the dirty old bastard. And there was a nurse there. Git.