I was abused by my GP - wish I'd reported it

[pinkbluepink]

The Jimmy Savile abuse cases have led me to re-think something that happened when I was a teenager.

I was 'abused' by my GP when I was 17 on a visit to the surgery to enquire about going on the pill. My GP asked me to undress and get on the couch so he could 'examine me' before he could recommend going on the pill. At the time I thought it odd, but then having not been in that situation before I obligingly removed my lower items of clothing and hopped onto the couch. The GP then proceeded to give me an 'internal' before returning to his desk and writing a prescription.

It was only much later when discussing going on the pill with friends that I realised what he had done to me was wrong, and even then I was too embarrassed to do anything about it.

In hindsight I wish I had reported him - how many other teenagers did he do this to?

The GP is question is probably dead now, but as a mother of teenage girls it makes me furious that someone in his position felt he was able to do this.

Not sure why I'm posting this now - just wanted to get it off my chest really. Thanks for reading.

[Whatalie]

I remember in the late 80's going to have a smear at a family planning clinic. Whilst waiting for the chaperone to come in, the Dr examined me without quite doing an internal (but still very thoroughly) without wearing gloves. When the chaperone came in he went and put gloves on and then came back to do the smear as if this was all normal. Although I thought it was weird, I didn't realise how wrong this was until I was a lot older.

Maybe the answer to all this, is that we tell our daughters what to expect and what doesn't need to be done when they see a Dr. We should make sure they know to ask for a chaperone and if they feel uncomfortable at any time they should say so.

[hotcrosbum2]

Does anyone remember having the 'cough check'at school?

We had a dr and nurse come in, had to line up go in from of the dr (there were three people sitting there, dr, nurse and I think the head teacher) and the dr put his fingers down my knickers and asked me to cough.

I must have been 5 I and I vid idly reber the look on this face as he did it and that he wasn't wearing gloves.

This was 1985.

[TeenyW123]

I haven't read all the thread, but when I went on the pill in 1977 ish I went to the BPAS and the doctor wanted to do an internal. I refused to have it done and I remember feeling a bit of a plonker listening to him berating me in front of some colleagues. He finished up saying something like "Well, we don't want her ending up pregnant so I'll just have to give her the pill."

I think it was definitely standard practice. A while later when requesting a repeat prescription elsewhere I did agree to an internal because I knew some friends had had it done and weren't perturbed by it. There was a practice nurse in attendance. Don't like them though!

[willitbe]

I think there is, in a sense, a difference between feeling violated and being abused for a persons self-gratification.

When I was age 7, I had to have anal examinations for medical reasons. One day I was as usual asked to strip from the waist down and laying on a couch. In walks not only the doctor but a who group of medical students. The intimate examination is them done on me. I felt totally violated and embarrassed.

Now there was nothing of a sexual nature being done, and the examination was necessary, but that did not stop the feelings of violation, humiliation and awkwardness.

Was the doctor wrong to do the examination - no.
Was the doctor wrong to assume that at age 7 I would not feel awkward about the medical students being there - yes

Was it abuse - no.
Was it done in an inappropriate manner - the physical part of the exam no, but the lack of privacy yes.

With exams after that I refused medical students to be present, the doctors found this odd, they really did not think it would worry a 7 year old.

I would hope that these days that the views of children would be sought before doing such a thing, but I guess it would only be the mum who would be asked anyway!

Sometimes with intimate physical examinations feelings of violation are bound to happen. But having been sexually abused myself, I think it is normally clear when the person us doing something for self-gratification and abuse, rather than as part of something that feels violating in the sense that it is an intimate examination. Some of the posts here are clearly describing sexual abuse. Other posts here sound more like a person feels violated because they felt an examination was un-necessary, rather than actual abuse taking place. Only the individuals involved can truly say if theirs was sexual abuse or not.

[MadIsTheNewNormal]

I remember there was a scene in Mad Men where Peggy was examined internally before being given the pill. I think it may have been standard practice years ago, and even if it had fallen out of normal practice by the time you had it done, possibly an old GP who was set in his ways may still have deemed it necessary/useful.

[Lalaloopsydaisy]

Is it possible that he was checking that you hadn't been abused by anybody else?

[Lalaloopsydaisy]

Sorry that was meant to be a reply to sausagerolemodel who had a medical when she was 10.

[BagOfBats]

This thread has been really interesting. As a GP I absolutely don't want to support or defend any of the shady stuff described upthread, as it gives me goosebumps just reading some of the horrible stories. I like to think I am approachable, and explain examinations, only do them when really necessary but this has really made me think, and I am going to make sure my communication regarding reasons for exam is completely crystal clear to patient- I think sometimes as doctors maybe because it's so obvious to us why an exam is necessary, we perhaps foolishly think it's obvious to the patient too. Thanks for making me think, OP.

[Jaffacakesallround]

Hit me if I am being off the mark here, but this thread has sprung to life again just as a similar one has been deleted by MNHQ due to concerns about the poster.

I hope it's not the same person using 2 threads.

[GoldenJane]

say's it all, I hope he rots in jail

www.scotcourts.gov.uk/opinions/2006HCJAC91.html

[Peekingduck]

"I had an 'uncomfortable' examination by an ageing male doctor when i went for an 'expert witness' appointment re whiplash. I had to strip off my top half and he examined my front"

Can I just say that I've recently had an expert examination for whiplash, by an older male specialist, with his female assistant present. I had to take my top off (kept my bra on) and he carefully examined my back and "front".

[Chickens123]

I'm astonished by the replies to this thread. I was assaulted by a GP 5 years ago. I had a coil put in at a family planning clinic. I went to the GP for something else and he said he wanted to check the coil was in place. I said I would go to the clinic but he insisted. He examined my tummy and said I needed a rectal exam, which he did. He did a smear ( when I had only had one only a few months previous) and an internal in two different positions on on my back as usual and one on my side, when he asked me to 'push' with his fingers inside me. He never left the space when I was changing and I was not offered a chaperone or a cover. Even though I asked for one he said there was no time The exam was so rough he made me bleed. When he was examining me, I could hear him breathing heavy and going red. Several times I said I wanted to stop and he got very angry saying it was important to have a pelvic exam and that it would hurt a bit. He even refered me to a specialist and said 'when the results come back I will examine you again'. I never went to the specialist! I had been having trouble at home and with my daughter who has ADHD. When I left the GP he said if things get bad at home you know we will have to call social services. The next day I had a visit from a psychiatric nurse and a social worker! On reflection he threatened me with taking away my child. I wonder if he ' chose' me as a vulnerable patient.
MOST patients have a right to refuse medical treatment and this includes internals for what ever reason( policy or not). You can refuse you can insist one chaperone and you can insist the GP stops at any time.

IF A VICTIM DOES NOT CONSENT AND THE PERPETRATOR KNOWS YOU DO NOT CONSENT IT IS A SEXUAL ASSULT. END OF STORY.

No one is above the law and no one should hide behind policy or good practice to perpetrate a crime.

[DoristheCamel]

I am no expert with gynaecological issues but I would not be shocked at dr asking to do an internal uf I went to them with period problems.
How old is your daughter? Was there a chaperone or was she offered one? Why are you so enraged?
Do you suspect she was abused?

[foadmn]

I had an appalling sore throat in 1999 and 2000. couldn't get it right. was referred to ent.

when there, I overheard a young teenage girl and her mum in with two elderly male doctors. I heard one of the doctors instruct the girl to remove her bra. the mum asked if that was really necessary as she only had a sore throat. the doctor said it was.

the nurse standing near me made eye contact with her colleague. I was called in to see a different doctor.

I thought then, and now, that it was very iffy.

[foadmn]

the door to the waiting room was open, by the way. I don't think that would happen now, but I don't know.

[kerrie1977]

same happened to me in1990 I was 14 went for pill in my school uniform and I was given a internal by a male doctor I do believe hes still practising but don't know if I could prove it or if he was ment to do I remember date time doctor as its stayed with me all my life

[Sylvana]

At 19 I was referred to a specialist by my GP for a breast lump. The specialist was an older doctor. During the breast exam he asked was I on the pill, if I was sexually active and was I married. I said yes to the first two questions and no to the last. He snarled that sex before marriage was completely wrong and I was to expect 'things to go wrong' if I continued with my disgusting behaviour. I tried to explain that I was in a committed relationship with my Fiance but he didn't want to know. He was very rough with me physically, pressing down on my breasts with such force that I cried in pain. When he did the biopsy I nearly passed out. This was in the 80's in Ireland but I was left very shocked by the experience. The attending nurse had a sympathetic but what did you expect look on her face.

Thirty years and 3 children later (by the same Fiance who became my DH!) I have had only positive experiences with the medical profession since that awful experience. My GP is wonderful - sympathetic, compassionate, kind and professional. My Obstetrician, in particular, was a gifted professional. He delivered all my children and he was the most amazing doctor I have ever had the pleasure of attending.

I have buried the brutal experience of that breast exam and the doctors backward views to the past - where they belong.

[Toohardtofindaproperusername]

I understand why people might be suggesting "counselling" for support to people but please please also consider logging these incidences as reports with gmc- there is probably another "jimmy Saville" type court case out there and raising the profile and awareness if this type of systematic abuse of power is really important.

[flashfalshflash]

Yeah Sylvana leave those experiences in the past - and therefore make sure that incidents like these continue. Because it couldn't happen now, could it?

[hoedown]

Flashfalse (sorry don't know how to tag), I had a very unpleasant vaginal and rectal examination a couple of weeks ago for ovarian cysts. Obviously there may have been a lot more to your experience than you have mentioned here, but I understood it be necessary when checking the size of the ovaries? My consultant was able to tell that my cysts had shrunk considerably and sent me for an internal ultrasound the next day to confirm. I was embarassed and it did hurt a bit but i didn't feel it was inappropriate in my case.

[TeaAndALemonTart]

I have never hear if a female having a cough test at school.