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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Honey traps leading to kinky fuckery and other dating adventures (No 21)

999 replies

KirstyWirsty · 29/08/2012 14:32

I want to know what Nicholas's tip was ... and the last thread was full!

OP posts:
mercury7 · 03/09/2012 11:38

i'd be tempted to ignore him worley..see how he likes that 'space'! :o

OhWesternWind · 03/09/2012 12:03

Would you believe it, just after my last post he's got in touch . . . Smile

Yogagirl17 · 03/09/2012 12:14

ooh WW, what did he say?

Worley- tried match.com very briefly way back and found it a bit scary. OKC actually hasn't been bad but am leaving it alone for a bit while I see if anything happens with this guy.

MadameOvary · 03/09/2012 13:48

Well I may have a breakfast date tomorrow if DD goes to nursery. Kept her off today as she has a cough and temperature. But as she is currently racing around outside i think its safe to assume she's feeling better.
Bloke in question lives nearby (another one!) and I'm feeling quite relaxed whatever happens.
Also exchanged messages with a tall non-potato (shocker). Will see where that goes.
Loving all the declarations of happy singledom on this thread btw!

hatesponge · 03/09/2012 16:05

I'm back :) Have just caught up (I think) with everyone's news. It's lovely that everyone sounds so happy whether thats due to the presence or indeed absence of a man Grin

My news...absolutely nothing from ScaredofPeas Hmm. PFWB however has spent literally all weekend texting me, saying he can't wait to see me (I take all this with a pinch of salt cos I've heard it all before) etc etc. Meanwhile I have had lots of male attention in RL which is odd (well, its odd when I'm not all dressed up false eyelashed and fake tanned anyhow), I've had offers of assistance with finding items in the supermarket, 2 different guys carried my suitcase for me on the Tube today, a man tried to sell me a caravan and gave me his card with promises of a special discount! and a rather lovely guy who engaged me in conversation at the station when I was seeing my friends off yesterday...honestly this never happens to me. Its weird. On the basis it almost certainly won't last for much longer, I'm just going to try and enjoy it!

Yogagirl17 · 03/09/2012 16:35

sponge that's great - all the real life attention must mean you are giving off positive vibes - keep it up!

Came across a leaflet in my dentist's office today for a site called Mysinglefriend.com. Seemingly the brainchild of Sarah Beany the idea is that you get your friend to write your profile for you. No idea if it's any good.

lubeybooby · 03/09/2012 18:09

I've heard people sing it's praises yogagirl but it costs to join so be prepared for that

Lueji · 03/09/2012 18:13

Sponge, maybe you should dress down more often? Wink

Maybe you are feeling better and more confident about yourself, and it shows?

Yogagirl17 · 03/09/2012 18:32

Bugger. Despite the success of last night's date and promise of date no. 2, I'm missing Mr60 more than ever and desperate to get in touch and basically beg for his attention Sad

Worley · 03/09/2012 18:42

yoga - remind me of Mr60 ?
I quite miss texting and talking to the one that wanted space.. but im not texting him. I went past his shop three times today and didn't even look in through window to see if he was about. I've never walked past there so quickly.. usually my dc want to go in as they like to play on the iPads but I managed to avoid it. frog marched them past lol..

Yogagirl17 · 03/09/2012 18:56

Mr60 was my summer romance - guy I really fell hard for, thought we had a great connection emotionally & physically, very similar lifestyles. But he panicked about the 60 mile distance between us (somewhat understandiby as he nearly got engaged to someone who lived far away and then it all fell apart when neither one of them could move). biggest problem was he messed me around a bit - he said no, then he started flirting with me again, said no again, then sent me drunk messages saying he was horny and missed me etc. So in the end I had to cut all contact with him but I miss him terribly, and having had a bad day the one I want to talk to is not last night's date but Mr60.

Worley · 03/09/2012 19:03

arh I remember now.. sounds like my mrspace.. sending me drunk messages and ringing me up drunk to tell me he loved me and wanted us to have dc etc etc.. arses
has anyone ever seen a medium and they've predicted things that came true or not? weird question I know.. just wondering... I get a lot of people come into my work and tell me that a medium predicated so and so and it's happened.. (I work in nhs and not for mental health!)

fayster · 03/09/2012 19:22

Yoga, of course it's him you want to talk to, he's familiar and he'll get why you're having a bad day. But, he'd only let you down again, and you're going to be so much better in the long run with someone who wants to listen about your bad days, and who won't let you down.

I agree with the others, Sponge, you must be giving off lots of lovely happy friendly vibes. Keep it up!

My date was nice yesterday, easy to talk to, seemed like my type of guy. He text me after to say he'd enjoyed meeting me and would like to do it again, and will dream up something to do, but I've not heard anything today. We'll have to wait and see, but he's the first date I'd actually like to see again.

I'm in the 'no chemistry before meeting' camp. In fact, I think I'd rarely have a big spark at a first meeting even, because I use that to screen men - no alcohol and only gentle flirting (if any) on a first date. They don't get my phone number until I've met them and decided they're safe, but having made bad decisions in the past, I'm particuarly cautious.

Lueji · 03/09/2012 19:23

How many people have been to mediums and it didn't happen to them?
Are they likely to tell you about it? Wink

Lueji · 03/09/2012 19:25

Yoga, I had the urge to tell ex about DS's little things, even though he was abusive in all contact.

I didn't, btw.

But just to say that the need to have someone familiar to talk to who cares is very natural.

Yogagirl17 · 03/09/2012 19:31

Worley - yes sounds just like your mrspace. fayster - u r exactly right, he will get why I'm having a bad day, he knows all about what's going on in my life and would be lovely about it all. But he would also let me down again. I know that, I'm just not feeling very strong today. (esp as I've just made a recipe he gave me and it went down a treat with the kids so even more temptation to use that as an excuse to get in touch). Keep us posted about your 2nd date!

Llareggub · 03/09/2012 19:49

My best friend met her husband on my single friend. I keep meaning to try it.

snapespeare · 03/09/2012 19:59

Not much to report her . Nowt from PM for a couple of days prof has asked me to a thing at the end of October. That sounds a bit long termy to me.

BensonRiley · 03/09/2012 20:09

Lurker here. You lot are so funny!

I guess I'm considerably older than most of you and, after about 5 years of being on my own, decided I didn't really want to spend the rest of my life alone. I found the prospect of online dating really scary, and looked at Match, My Single Friend, POF and others. Eventually, the one I found best, for me, was Kindred Spirits, at the Telegraph. I like the way it matches people, and sends you profiles you normally wouldn't give a second glance, but can be quite interesting. I signed up, didn't put up a picture, didn't pay the subscription (you can look, but not touch, so to speak, for free) and looked at it from time to time, becoming increasingly more disillusioned with all the seemingly old, bald, fat men, and thinking "is this all there is out there at my age?". Then I got an email from them, saying I'd lurked for ages, and would I like a free week's subscription? So I put up a photo, wrote a profile, and had absolutely no idea what to expect.

3 years later we are still together, and we live 120 miles apart. It's the best relationship I have ever had in my life.

I think I'm just trying to say don't stop looking, and don't make a big distance a no-no. You just never know.

OhWesternWind · 03/09/2012 20:14

What a lovely story Benson, you lucky thing you!! How do you arrange things do that the distance isn't a problem? (Will check out the Times site later) Smile

OhWesternWind · 03/09/2012 20:15

Oops, Telegraph!!

BensonRiley · 03/09/2012 20:28

I don't think I phrased what I meant to say well: what I meant to say was that our paths would never have crossed in RL due to the distance, and it is only down to the internet and how so many people meet now, that we did. We both feel that we are, for want of a soppy phrase, each other's soulmate. We both have older children, his with his ex, and mine are old enough to be away or, if still at home, left with my ex or just abandoned. Hell, it's my turn to have fun. We just get in the car and drive, and 2 hours later, there we are. Has to be done. One day, when all my kids have left, it will be the time to organise being together all the time. Good luck to the rest of you xxx

Movingforward123 · 03/09/2012 21:28

Well I know I said I was done with online dating, but I had a message from a guy today and he seems really nice, not sure how much I will fancy him though Confused

Also another guy looked at my profile and he is hott! I want to message him but feel like I need to think of something interesting and funny to say! Any ideas?? Confused

hatesponge · 03/09/2012 21:36

Moving is there anything in his profile you could make a joke or witty remark about? failing that just say something complimentary about how attractive he is or how intelligent he sounds. Men are always suckers for a bit of flattery :)

hatesponge · 03/09/2012 21:39

Sorry, meant to say interesting not intelligent!