The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Still On A Sober Holiday, Waiting For The Summer!

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, Mouse

I'm one of the Brave Babes on the Battle Bus, it's HUGE and never gets full, the doors are always open, 24/7, every single day.

We're a mixture of people who have been drinking for most of our lives and in one way or another, abuse(d) alcohol.

Some of us have stopped drinking every day completely and are taking it One Day At A Time.

Some are trying to control their drinking with medication, willpower, AA, some of us aren't quite sure what we want or where we're trying to get, but we're here, we're all in the same boat Bus, and there's a seat for ANYONE who wants one.

You can find the previous threads HERE and where this Bus first started it's journey, thanks to a wonderful lady, who'd hit rock bottom face first (and she'd admit that to us herself), seeking help and advice from a bunch of 'strangers' on an internet forum........

Come have a peek, take a seat, we don't bite or judge. We listen and will try to help, best we can.

Thanks alias. I did it. Even declined wine at my friend's house where I am staying tonight. Back to the Olympic park for swimming in the morning.

Hope all is calm and rural's trip went ok...

Morning babes

Boing!

Well it's Think it Through Thursday - a day to look back and remember why you're here. What were your reasons for wanting to stop, cut back on, take a break from all that booze. Maybe go back to find your first post and remind yourself of the life you really want. A day for strengthening resolve.

And if you are wobbling, remember, it's only one day. A few hours 'til bedtime, keep yourself busy, active, rest if needed, eat well, look after yourself and before you know it you will be waking tomorrow morning with a lovely Boing, a spring in your step and a feeling of satisfaction and pride.

Will that do you?

x

Faire lovely post, very inspiring. I just wanted to say thank you to everyone for the support during my recent blip. I think it was meant to happen really. I stopped the antabuse far too early (after less than 3 months), thought I'd broken the binge drinking habit and could drink sensibly and after only 1 month of trying to control it I'm back to exactly where I was. This has to be the last time I expected a different outcome and I have to accept that I can't drink.

The antabuse is on my bedside table and I took my first tablet last night. It felt so liberating, to know that I'd be safe today and as long as I take it properly will be safe for as long as I need. This time I'm committed to using it long term. Luckily I don't seem to have alienated DD; we had a lovely evening and she told me several times how much she loved me. I'm very fortunate but know this is probably my last chance.

Joey I'm so glad you seem to be turning a corner at work. And NoNo that's hard, turning down a friend's offer of wine so well done. That's what always undoes me, I can't seem to say no but I'll have to really practice whilst I'm on the antabuse so it becomes natural. What did you say to her?

faire - lovely post! I can hear your boing and should be able to raise you one but due to going to bed at 1am and getting up at 6.30 I can't seem to muster one!

soma - that is great news about your DD. you won't have alienated her and it is lovely to hear about your evening. Hold on to that feeling and lock it inside for when things get tough. I just told my friend last night that I needed to cut down on my drinking as it was making me feel rubbish. She is a v old friend tho and I know she feels bad about her drinking so it was an easy conversation. I tend just to say I am getting old and can't hack the hangovers these days making light of it

In the aquatic centre for Swimming today. Feeling very tired indeed but looking forward to it. My last Paralympic event but I have been fortunate and seen 6 2012 events in total!

That's a great way to deflect a drink NoNo, think I'll use it myself. And I really am getting old, 55 on Saturday, how is this possible? Enjoy your day watching the swimming.

Kot you conjure up a most enticing image but just imagine it's a bottle instead and it goes down really quickly and then you want another one....So enjoy day 6 and look forward to going to bed sober.

kot I get what you mean about the visual image of a nicely shaped glass, which is why I now make such an effort to keep elderflower presse in the fridge, the freezer stocked with ice-cubes, and have invested in lovely glasses to drink out of expensive but beautiful glasses

No drinking luke-warm, flat tonic out of a cheap, chipped glass. I deserve better

And then also imagine the BB house the morning after - people with stinking breath, tense heads, maybe being sick.

kotinka those are the kind of images that get me, the ones where the sophisticated couple drink chilled wine in the garden on a balmy summers evening... even your description had me salivating! ITS ALL ADVERTISING

I am on the cusp. 4 days and am getting the little voice that says 'well you managed that easily so you obviously don't have a problem!'

But am also getting very close to the other place where there are no little voices at all, and that is so much better.

soma its lovely to have that feeling of being 'safe' away from the booze isn't it? So weird that we want it and hate it at the same time.

definitely all advertising - and those advertisers know exactly who they're targeting and it isn't sophisticated couples who enjoy one glass of wine of an evening in the garden come summertime. they're targeting tired, stressed mums with the idea that peace and domestic serenity can be found in a bottle. it works on us because we're the target audience i guess. same as when you look round at wine positioning in the supermarket - don't mean the aisle of wine i mean those little stands that pop up, it's telling to see where they position them.

the market square in my little town now has 5 pubs and 4 betting shops. they appear to be the only people doing business in this dying town and that's because they sell stuff to addicts.

sorry for that - i always notice that in town now - betting shops have sprung up everywhere and the pubs are all going strong despite everything else closing down around them.

day 5 here thank god! went to my home group meeting last night and shared back that i'd been drinking, was really honest and hopefully a good reminder to people of how shit it is and how it really is the first drink and it is true that it is a progressive disease - everytime you go back it will get worse and the process speeds up. boo hiss etc

i can't drink. i'm an alkie.

love the thursday reflection faire - can we have that weekly please?

i'm in mad deliberations as to whether to defer or to start my course this month. really not sure of the best way forward. hoping inspiration will come and quickly.

saf do you have a reason for wanting to defer?

koti I have the cravings and visions too. Have been able to resist the last couple of nights by playing the film to the end. Feel very close to falling off the bus big style as I did two weeks ago.
nono well done for resisting yesterday and my appointment was OK. Under a few departments due to an accident nearly two years ago. Seeing Gynaecology, Orthopaedic and general surgery consultants and pain management consultant. Was seeing physio in the early days then told to stop by consultants. Was told yesterday I could start again. Really pleased about that because it really seemed to help.

rural - you have done amazingly well. The feeling of vulnerability and precariousness is wearing but I find it keeps me on my toes. I am more in danger of slipping if I become complacent or let myself be caught off guard. If I am mindful of the fragility of my sobriety, I seem to be able to resist the call of the red temptress!

well I think I'm going to stop taking the mirtazapine as it seems to be giving me side-effects. I know you're supposed to taper gradually but I just can't be bothered, I seem to spend my whole time thinking about my health and want quick results. [I was seriously ill about 15 years ago, and its left me with a managed medical condition - and permanent hypochondria ]

I'm aware of the withdrawal warnings... but have stopped seroxat before without too many problems so hopefully it will go okay. As long as it doesn't trigger an alcohol craving....

How long have you been on mirtazapine? I was on it for 2+ yrs. the weight gain stabilised after a while and I managed to control the hunger. It did get better

I would just be wary of taking yourself off it too quickly and without the advice / support of your GP. You were prescribed it for a reason so perhaps you need something else instead?

Today I finally admitted that I can't do this alone. I have an appointment Monday morning for 45mins counselling followed by ongoing daily group therapy.

Trouble is, now I'm starting to worry if I'm bad enough to warrant their time and resources. I could be taking up a precious place that somebody more deserving needs.

Oh this is such hard work, it's taking over my life and I just want it to be not happening

MrsM you 'deserve' help just as much as anyone else, and you have a good chance of success because you are open and ready to accept the help.

Kot try this. Take a tall, beautifully curved glass and half fill with crushed ice. Drizzle lime cordial over the ice and cover with freshly opened sparkling water. Stir it gently and watch the cold drops of condensation slither down the glass. See the bubbly fizz and sparkle in the evening sunlight filtering through the window. Add a thin slice of zesty lemon and find a calm place to enjoy your drink, perhaps watching the sun set or loosing yourself in some gently soothing music.

That's my best ever favourite soft drink. Not too sweet, nice and cold with a little bit of a citrus kick. Nothing and tonic is good too. Or chilled peppermint tea. For warm drinks, hot choc has to be a fave but also coffee if I'm feeling hungry (it seems to hit the spot) and flavoured teas - orange, mango and cinammon or milkthistle and fennel. Some fruit juice and smoothies are lovely too.

There are lots of gorgeous non-alkie drinks out there but you just need to put a bit of effort into planning ahead. We always find the time and money to buy alcohol, so just think of these others drinks as treats and well deserved

MrsM I agree with the others, you as just as deserving as anyone else and I really hope it all goes well for you. Come back and let us know how you got on won't you?

Just checking in.

are you OK ma?

Yeah,proud I'm OK. Things hectic trying to get funds together to see if dd2 can take up her college place.
Am in the sidecar and not making the slightest effort to keep up with all you babes who are doing so well.