real life challenges vs online misadventures, dating (and non-dating) thread 19

[hatesponge]

I have been to the pub. I'm not pissed but I am happy (well happier at least).

Conclusions reached this evening:

1. I am pretty bloody amazing, and any man I choose to date is very very lucky and should appreciate this fact!
2. Online dating is not for me. But I have learned from it that I shouldnt judge a book by it's cover and not to be so superficial
3. Man from the weekend DID like me, he is either still in love with his wife, or still hurt by her and lacking in confidence, there is NOTHING I did wrong, and he probably will be back at some point, but it will be too late because I will have MOVED ON :)
4. I am joining the gym and losing my remaining 3 stone.
5. I am going back to my old haunts in Essex this weekend because I have the best nights out there and feel at home. I intend to drink, dance, look fabulous and talk to anyone and everyone!

So that's my resolutions for the thread in essence, less moaning, more exercise, to have fun and be sociable to everyone, less aloof unavailable ice queen and more friendly and approachable.

Chaotic you have exposed a weakness in my drinks cabinet...

I'm bored too, daren't start on the alkerol, have a weekend of peace ahead and wondering if I should exercise.

DD is going to Blackpool tomorrow with the paternal grandparents. So that's me bored for 4 days too. It is a shame we don't live closer, we could have had a party!

I am good at parties but won't allow my friends to come make a mess my drinks cabinet is empty cos I don't drink often cos my meds (i'm epileptic BTW)

Cryptic message of the day (so far...)

'I don't know what people like you get from coming to places like this'

What does that mean?! We'll never know, I've blocked him.

I suspect Snape it's a cack handed way of telling you you are too good for dating sites.

Hello all. I am off out for a BBQ with a load of people today. I intend to get vey vey drunk and completely ignore what might be waiting in my inbox when I return either that or he'll get a drunken nonsense reply

Snape I have got absolutely no idea wtf that's supposed to mean, if pushed i would agree with Time, one of those things along the lines of 'why is a gorgeous girl like you single' etc etc (I hate that crap!)

This is my latest message

'Hey there!
How are you doing today? I mean no Disrespect to have dropped you a Note. Basically, I am NEW to this and was taking a surf when I stumbled across your profile. I would really appreciate the chance of getting to know you. I am pretty new to the online world but I believe it works and I am ready to give it a trial. No head games or One night stand because I think I am getting way too old for that. I am not in a rush and I do not have any bad intention, just looking for someone decent to make a good conversation with. I don't mean to sound nosy but I must admit that You're stunningly gorgeous and I would really love to learn more about you.

I will be looking forward to hearing from you in earliest.

This guy lives in Kansas. Long way to go for a coffee innit?

Have a lovely day Lubey but please don't get too drunk, we need an update on your inbox at your earliest convenience!

'hey! How are you? Would love to get to know you better over a bottle of champers or wine x you look like a princess'

Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahha hahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahha!!!

lubey. Have a lovely day! :-).

would have been good if he had thrown in a kebab too.

Aww now see I think that's quite sweet

Although he does seriously lose marks for use of the word champers!

The last message I got said something along the lines of how attractive I was and what a lovely figure I had. I made the mistake of thinking that was quite nice of him, and replying and saying thanks.

I then got another one back saying 'so can I put my cock between your tits'

I really do despair of men sometimes....

sorry Sponge, but that made me laugh!

sponge.

Hahaha!! Me too!

SPONGE I would be tempted to respond with "only if you want it cut off"

time he probably meant that you don't need to be on dating sites to find someone cos you could get anyone you wanted, just poorly worded.

I've blocked three guys this morning. Power!!!!!

1. 'what is someone like you doing on a site like this' guy - hardly completed profile, if he was trying to compliment me, he has a poor command of language, I suspect he'd be one of the 'you think you're too good for me, don't you?' if i dont respond, which i wont, types. Couldn't be bothed to engage, so blocked.

2. chatting away to inoffensive guy yesterday, him: you have a nice smile! Me: thank you, I think my teeth are a bit small for my head, but they all work. Him: well done on the teeth front. How big is yo ass? Couldn't be bothered. Blocked.

3. princess guy, was being polite, told him that as he is only a 35% match, he could surely find someone more compatible, it's a big site, there's plenty of lovely women. Him: it's always been my fantasy to sleep with a girl like you' profile specifically states I don't do casual sex. Blocked.

On the up side, smashing bloke from Staines, who is lovely and I felt bad about leading him on, so I've confided the honey trap nature of the profile with him, he wants a family, I've clearly already got one and don't really want anymore children, so we are conspiring nicely together. :). Anyone near Staines who wants a baby, I've got a smart articulate, sensitive hottie for you!

sponge tuts Had to laugh at your message though

snape I think that message meant you were too good for dating sites too. Wrt 'champers' I have to admit this is one area where my tastes are slightly cheaper, my mum gave me a bottle of asti-spumante and a bottle of champagne, that she and my stepfather were given, as they don't drink them. I much preferred the asti to the champagne.

Time I have been known to do online parties with friends before.

I quite like a a nice Asti as well, LIDL do a fab one. :). I've got a bottle of taittinger waiting for PM to get a job. Always like to have a bottle tucked away, I like celebrating! :-)

Talking to a potato from Texas just now. Damn this responding to almost everyone nonsense, if I didn't want the magical, encouraging 'replies often' tag I'd be watching paint dry right now on the basis it's somewhat more interesting.

'hi. How are you?'

1. Oh I'm fine thanks. Got a bit of a migraine from snorting coke off of hookers tits until 2am, but I've downed a couple of shots of vodka, so I hope the head improves soon. You?

2. I'm feeling wonderful now that I've accepted the lord Jesus Christ our saviour into my life. You?

3. honey trap profile, suspect husband on Internet dating sites, trying to see of he bites. Sorry for confusion, have a good day!

.... .

The Texan is an active serviceman in Kabul. I'm going to feel terrible binning him off. :-(

Just send a blank message then block Snape, don't waste the words or the effort on men you have no intention of meeting. You are being far too nice, we don't want you getting overly involved with strange men when you have a strange one of your very own, just waiting for you to be brave enough to leap on him

How many messages do you actually have to send to get the 'replies often' special status? And why is it so important that you get it? So that PM believes you to be actively active in your search?

God you're devious.

I love you a little bit more now. ;-)

Yeah, I think that 'seldom replies' is a bit off-putting when one already has chronically low self esteem and hardly ever gets responses to their messages. So if he twigs it's me, I look lovely and actively persuing it. If he doesn't, then he'll think 'wow,' & then send me a message. It's a tactic. :-)