The Brave Babes Battle Bus - All Going On A Sober Holiday! <crosses fingers that it stays sunny>

[Mouseface]

Hello, tis me, mouse

Welcome to The Brave Babes Battle Bus, grab yourself a seat, they're really comfy and a , oh and a home-made chocolate chip before they all get eaten!

We're a Bus full of alcohol abusers/addicts, some of us say it out loud, some whisper it and some aren't ready to say it at all just yet.

That said, there are a few of us who just have the occasional drink and that's something that they can handle. There are a few of us who must NEVER have another drink because that first one will lead to many, many more which will only ever end badly.

We're open to all....there are no requirements to join us on our journey to sobriety, there's support, great laughs, tears and tantrums here and that's just me!!!

If you'd like to see how we got here, follow THIS LINK

Hi Babes
I don't post very much any more, but I thought I would just hop aboard to say I have passed my 2 year anniversary of sobriety. Weirdly I only realised about three weeks after the date. I am enormously grateful to this thread and still consider myself a Babe, even though I only pop in occasionally. Life without alcohol is great, I wish you all the best in beating the demon drink, you can do it. x

Hello Kotinka and hi to all,

Venus- those images made me laugh! I like swirly art galleries but I liked the name gugg because it's little and dark and round, like me.

Ma I'm glad you mentioned about the tickets and trips. I had been wondering how it all worked,I want to join in conversations and I need to be honest about drinking and about some of the horrible things it has lead me to do, on the other hand, i'm very new and don't want to stick my clown sized trotters into my north and south immediately!

I have a big test coming up. i have two nights out with my friends some of whom are my drinking buddies. i have already said that I will drive and not drink. I'm guessing that some of them already know I like to drink more than I should. I am bringing a soft drink and just hope I can manage it.

Hi there kotinka and welcome, and hi again to gugg

Mostly we are still over on the old thread CLICK HERE TO SEE THE LINK

We try to fill an old thread up first, partly so we don't confuse ourselves to buggery by having 2 threads going at once (my old, wine addled brain doesn't cope with that much complexity), but mostly because if we leave blank posts on the old thread then someone new or in need might come and post and have their 'cry for help' go unanswered.

The 'tickets', and 'day-trips' and references to 'side-cars etc' are all comments related to being on the Brave Babes Battle Bus (which someone nicknamed 'Gerald'). Please don't worry about any of that, we use it as a metaphor sometimes to explain what's going on - i.e. once you've posted once you've got a life-time ticket to hop on an off these threads whenever and wherever you want. And sometimes people who are trying controlled drinking refer to themselves as being on the roof-rack - depicting the scary, white-knuckle ride with some close shaves that they experience when they nearly forget about controlled drinking and revert to type. And some people who are with us but do not have the energy to stop or cut down, or who have a terrible hangover, may refer to themselves as being in the sidecar (sometimes the sidecar of [self-imposed] shame) just riding along next to the bus, but not actually contributing or joining for a bit.

Hmm that makes it all sound terribly cliquey, which I really hope it's not. We are just a bunch of women (and a couple of men) on the internet who realise that our relationship with alcohol is not good, and who try to support ourselves and each other in what ever way we can. Please post anything you like about what you're worried about and what you're feeling.

Hi everyone, just booking my seat, more a lurker than a poster, but hopefully that will change

venus said
Hmm that makes it all sound terribly cliquey, which I really hope it's not.

I've never met a less cliquey group of people in my life!!

Well done Thurso and Bproud for filling up the old thread. You will get brownie points from Mouse for sure

Just marking my place, will catch up later x

Hello all x

Mouse did it .

I am just going to read my book for a while and then have an early night, as Dh is out.

Love to all
T xxxx

What does happen if we don't fill up the fred? Do MumsnetHQ get shirty?

BProud - nope, MNHQ don't get shirty, it's just that we might miss a new/er Babe that's all, so it's good to close the thread and move on..... like so many other things in our lives!

Off for a nice Birthday dinner with MrMouse so will be back tomorrow xxxx

Koti - IME, the cravings NEVER go away, they lesson. And become more past rather than present feelings.

I can say with hand on heart, keeping busy, distraction, is key.

I don't know how much you know about me Koti but I have a DS who is adopted by most of the Babes here called Nemo who is a three year old handful of busy on a 24/7 basis.

When sober, he is easy to care for, when not, it's hell on earth.I'd like to check out lots of times but I can't and I won't whilst I have him in my care. It took some shitty moments in my life, plus the support of these threads to make me see that the night his consultant told me to call my DH and tell him his son was dying, and to drive for 2 hours as safely but fast as he could to say goodbye, still wasn't enough to make me stop.

Thurso - will reply tomorrow - hectic time just now. xx

Babes - I have to say good night. I love this place..... it's my down time after a day of hobbling around town. Tonight my pain levels are sky high and my morphine isn't helping, so lying down is the only option just now.

Tomorrow is another busy day, I have a cleaner starting. Not because I'm too proud or rich to clean, but because I just can't do it any more. It hurts too much. It really hurts.

Lots of love to you all,

Mouse

BTW - MissP - fab to see you here! great that you came to post... I miss the posters from the early days and it's always good to see Babes back here xx

Kotinka the cravings do fade, but it takes a long, long time for that to happen. So in the meantime you have to manage them. As Mouse says you need to keep busy and you have to PLAN. Have the drinks and snacks ready that will fulfill your thirst and sugar craving, do something that makes you feel good and that you have acheived something - read a book and be able to remember what you have read, tidy a drawer, paint your toenails, all things that are hard to do when drunk
Mouse I hate to think of you suffering, I do hope your next appointmant offers some light at the end of the tunnel. Good idea to get a cleaner, you are so worth it, and if you can be relieved of that task, I hope it will give you a little more energy to devote to yourself and your precious family.
Sleep tight x

MissP congratulations on 2 years! We need an olympics stylee gold medal emoticom for you!

dammit I just tried to post a long message on the last thread and it wouldn't accept it and then it got lost

when did you all hop on the new bus?! that happened so fast..

I did that too Joey and then thought "que sera sera" in my very intentional, let it go state . Although my post was about some very worthy books .

The new bus does happen very fast sometimes!

Mouse I hope you have had a very lovely MrMouse dinner, and won't ask anything else! I hope so much that your pain is easing, and for goodness sake, don't worry about whatever help you have. Sending you love
T xxxx

my post said (fingers crossed) to fire counselling doesn't 'fix' you, but it can help you (if you're ready for it). I have stopped going, maybe temporarily who knows, because as my counsellor said I have developled good 'coping strategies'. She said there was still deep work to uncover but at the moment I don't have time/money/energy.

MissP what can I say, Congratulations. xxx

Dear Brave Babes

I don't post often but this thread has supported my sobriety for nearly as long as it has been going. It is the one thread I read/catch up on when I can. I am immensely grateful to everyone who takes the time and energy to keep it fresh each day - as an aside - Ma I can 'hear' the boing in your posts today.

Please may I share something with you, my never met fellow passengers? It would have been our first child's 21st birthday today. He was delivered prematurely 21 years ago at 7 36 in the evening on his way to dying. For 28 days the medical profession worked to keep him alive but it was clear that that was a temporary situation. After much discussion, some tests to be sure, we asked, and the doctors agreed, to withdraw ventilation. Our first son died at 29 days old. He is not alone, as our second child was also delivered very prematurely, anticipating a similar outcome, but born well, as well as a 1lb 7 oz baby can be, but he too died at 8 days old.

We are now blessed with two children in their teens (one just) who know of their brothers before them.

I have spent today with a parallel day 21 years ago running alongside, sometimes close to tears sometimes wondering what might have been - leaving to travel to a fetal cardiology unit, having the scan (must have been near cutting edge back then), waiting for the doctors to confer, the meeting to relay the scan findings then a return to our home hospital - DH driving fast but not too fast, urgent activity at the delivery suite. You can be shaved, catheterised and sign the consent form surrounded by many strangers at the same time whilst hearing your baby's hearbeat slow. And then I was out for the count and woke up a mum.

Why am I sharing this? Well, I have lovely family and friends but I rarely mention my first two children and they would feel bad if I were to say it James' 21st birthday, because, quite rightly, they live and interact with us in the here and now and would not have remembered. I know you will all read this and want to say all sorts. There is no need. I just needed to share with someone. I will probably metion to DH before the evening is over that I have tidied the grave and placed flowers as I have done for the past 20 years.

Today has not been a trigger for drinking and I am relieved.

JWIM I don't know what to say, but I want you to know that I am shedding a few tears for your two babies who were here too briefly. Know that someone apart from you is thinking of them right now. Xxx