Success, standards and still holding out for Johnny Depp...dating thread 18

[ChaoticismyLife]

Forget the olympics...we're aiming for dating gold.

Only the best is good enough.

As you were....:)

[hatesponge]

I have a new dress for the races tomorrow - Monsoon sale - here

Just hoping it doesn't rain all afternoon now!

[watchoutforthatsnail]

Ooohhh snape, I'm.really excited for you :)

Sponge, :( just takes me to the main monsoon page

[MrsToddNeeLovett]

Ok help me guys - I'm toying with the idea of toning it right down and going casual - after all, we're going bowling!!

So I'm going to wear these jeans

with either a black sequiny off the shoulder top or a lacy vest type thing what do you reckon??

[MrsToddNeeLovett]

lace vest

[hatesponge]

watch dress is called 'mimi' (Id love to know who thinks up names for monsoon dresses...) its a blue halterneck.

mrstodd i'd say that was fine for bowling, you dont want to look too dressy :)

[TimeForMeAndDD]

£128 for a pair of jeans! Oh my word. I think I've spent a fortune if I've spent £30 on a pair of jeans! They are very nice though, and I like the top too

Lueji Men are overrated, not just second dates!

Sponge Nice dress, hope you get the sun to make the most of the halter neck

[hatesponge]

christ on a bike I read the price of those jeans as £28!

Mine are £10 from Primark

Time I'm hoping for sun. But I dont feel the cold much (plenty of insulation) so anything other than rain - and/or mud - is good. If I get my cream shoes muddy I will not be happy!

[TimeForMeAndDD]

Primark jeans aren't long enough for me, if they were mine would be from there too!

Sponge well I hope the sun shines for you, it will make for a much better day and a happier mood if it does. Are your shoes stilettos? Because if they are you will spend most of the time sinking into the ground

[MrsToddNeeLovett]

lol can I just point out they were NOT the actual jeans I bought! just the ones that looked most like the ones I DID buy (for £27 )

Ok I've decided on the jeans, and that lace top but in blue rather than white cos I iz fat

Now just the shoes to deliberate over ...

Do I go for heels (and risk being taller than him?!) or tone it down with something like these ?

[MrsToddNeeLovett]

Or my bright red ballerinas to really mix it up

[hatesponge]

Ah Time I only have short little legs, Primark jeans are a bit long for me in fact :) No stilettos tomorrow, sort of block-y heels which hopefully wont sink too much.

MrsTodd I'd go for any footwear I could wear socks under. Simply because there is no way I would put my bare foot in a bowling shoe

[MrsToddNeeLovett]

ewww no way - I'd take a pair of rolled up socks if I had to!

[TimeForMeAndDD]

I've got those sandals MrsTodd, I don't know about you but I find them a bit 'sloppy', a bit wide, and my feet slip about in them. Having said that, you will be taking them off for bowling anyway so I don't suppose that matters I do like the sound of the bright red ballerinas! And phew re the jeans!! Ooh just seen sponges post re socks and bowling shoes, and I totally agree. Can women get away with socks and sandals?

Sponge I've got long legs and I resent them every time I look at Primark jeans because they do look far nicer than the jeans I buy from NEXT. They've got some lovely coloured ones in at the minute too. Good news re the shoes/heels

[TimeForMeAndDD]

You could always wear popsocks MrsTodd, in american tan

[snapespeare]

mrstodd red shoes!! I love red shoes..

this is my fab dress :)

[TimeForMeAndDD]

That's a lovely dress Snape, I love the neckline and it will indeed emphasise norkage department.

[snapespeare]

Mr beardy has declared I am hot, sexy and have amazing eyes.

I like this!

Please please please don't let him be five foot 6 and bald.

[ChaoticismyLife]

Wrt eharmony you can't see photos unless you're a paid member. I was a member for a while and found that most of the time men just didn't reply. I suspect a lot of this was because they joined for a month/free weekend and let membership lapse so they couldn't reply. Also you could get matches who were 200+ miles away unless you made sure you adjusted your distance settings, then number of matches could be reduced. Not just my experience, eharmony has a section where they write 'articles' that people can comment on and non replies were probably the most common complaint, along with not knowing when they were last online, although I think they changed that. At £30 per month it's not cheap, although it can work out cheaper if you take out longer memberships. I did rejoin on an offer that worked out at about £8 per month, for three months once. Overall I had a few dates but very few compared to the number of matches I received.

Snape great news about your date, nice dress too.

sponge I like your dress too, it's one of my favourite styles on me, hides my problem areas.

As another one with boobs, I also avoid high necks, they just don't look good. I see nothing wrong with a hint of cleavage :)

I can't remember who linked to it but that fb app, the relationship thingy says that I'm going to meet someone, whose name begins with D, on Oct 3 2015 at 10.46am Oh, and he's very nice...even more

I can hardly contain my excitement. I'll try not to hold my breath, otherwise the only man I'll be meeting will be an undertaker

[mzdemeanour]

As you know, Sponge, I do so get where you are coming from (long-time lurker/ex-poster on previous dating threads ..) ... but like others have said, it is a numbers game. I've met you IRL and know how attractive, intelligent, vivacious and damn good company you are ... maybe you are too attractive for some of the men you are meeting, maybe you are too intelligent for others ... unfortunately you don't/won't know ... all you can do is what has been said - put it down to their loss not yours ...

I don't know if you can remember that far back but I remember being in much the same position ... and I rarely even got first dates let alone second. Maybe have a look at what you're looking for - guy I eventually met when I decided to give internet dating one last chance had huge great warning signs and didn't really tick any of the boxes eg was married/lived a long way away/smoked etc ... but 18 months down the line (and a fair few ups and downs ...) we are still very much together.

It will happen - maybe take a break to lick your wounds/get some perspective/regain a thick skin/get back your sense of humour - and god knows we all need it when trying the cesspit that is online dating ...

I know none of this probably really helps - and wish I could give you an easy answer about what you could change - but honestly don't think there is anything .. one day, you will meet someone who will beg you for a second date ... that I promise you.

[snapespeare]

You should have a countdown clock, like the one for the Olympics in trafalagar square...

Three years, 2 months... 12 days....

[snapespeare]

sponge. Finally managed to see dress - its a peach! I am terrified of halter necks and wayward boobs! :)

[Scattylatte]

Hi all
I rarely get a second date either. In fact I struggle to get a first date.
Met someone for coffee yesterday. Good fun, attractive etc. He gave me a peck on the cheek when he left. Afterwards he text asking if I got home ok as I took the wrong way. He then text asking what i thought of him and I said I thought he was good company, funny. He said he thought I was very intelligent, and first impressions very nice to be with. A few kisses thrown in.
However I know this is just ministrations. I know that if someone wants to see me again I'll know before I've left the first date or within the first hour.
I go through phases of wondering what I'm doing wrong and it can and does effect my esteem. I have been out with some v good looking men and now I'm wondering what their motive was. Ugh.
I assume it's the way i look. I'm tall and fairly chunky.
Charlie: did your date guy get back to you?
Watch. It's heartening (if that's the right word) to hear your stories about the 60 dates. Actually I think reassuring is the word.
I need to get a thicker skin.

[hatesponge]

bloody hell Chaotic thats a while off! I darent do it myself, it will probably say 2042 or something and I will lose all hope :)

am not feeling the love for Eharmony tbh. Might have a search on Match & Lovestruck & see if I can see anyone who floats my boat...

I sent one of my friends a link to Mr Ill's profile earlier when I was feeling despondent, have been greatly cheered up by her response which was a) why do I want some sickly bloke whos always whining about how ill he is & b) that he looks like Peter Andre* & I should view it as a lucky escape!

*he doesnt particularly but it made me laugh anyway!

[hatesponge]

mzd you are far too kind about me :) I so hope one day I do find someone who will genuinely want a second, third & so on date. It does seem a bit of an impossible dream sometimes though!

[snapespeare]

Pfft, I'm tall, flabby around the middle, covered in stretch marks, seldom comb my hair, tons of tattoos, am smarter than 90% of the population, know it, don't suffer fools, have three children, am clumsy and horrifically opinionated. I don't look like a woman. I look like a transvestite. I have huge feet.

I'm also exceptionally generous, have a heart as big as an elephant, am witty, kind and laugh like I mean it. If someone is shallow enough to not like you just because you're a tall, 'chunky' woman, then they're frankly not man enough to handle you. :)