I m copying this from FB "So there we were eating particularly delicious olives and for some reason the subject of rape came up. And Anne said: "but these young girls who go out dressed in skimpy clothes and wind men up - don't you think they've got to take some responsibility for rape?"
It's an old, old idea isn't it, women taking responsibility for men raping them. (Or men's behaviour in general actually, but that's another issue.) So then Hannah asked: "If your Mick was down in the high street and saw a girl tottering around on high heels and drunk out of her skull, would he take her off to her hotel or the park or somewhere, to rape her?"
Anne looked a bit shocked. "Of course not!" "Neither would my Simon. But why not? The girl's drunk, she's out of her head, she's tottering around on heels, she's alone... why wouldn't they? Because they're not rapists."
That's a bit of a revelation for Anne.
That men who rape women, are rapists. Because men who rape women, are not monsters in dark alleyways with balaclavas, they are just men, like Anne's husband or Hannah's - or your's - but who differ from Anne's husband and your's, in that they make the choice to rape a woman (or women) and your husband and Anne's, as far as we know, don't. It's not the skyscraper heels or the hair extensions or the lipstick or the mini-skirts or the quantities of vodka drunk by their victims, that makes them rapists; it's their choice to rape. If a drunk, tottering, sky-scraper heeled woman meets your husband, or Anne's husband, she won't be raped; if she meets a rapist, she will. She won't be responsible for that; he will.
That's all. "