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Original poster

To think my husband is a cunt?

206 replies

dawnpreview · 23/05/2012 20:43

After yet another row, in which I am told I do nothing round the house as all I do is stay home and look after the kids. I just heard him shouting at the dog and saying to it 'you're a dickhead just like the rest of them'. How nice that he thinks that of his wife and kids :(
Just went down and let him know I had heard him, and got told 'well it's true, none of you listen to me'
I am sat here in tears now, as I am just so fed up of everything being my fault and him never taking responsibility for any of it.
I know he works hard, and fully support him in all he does. But with 4 year old twins to look after, I don't exactly sit on my arse all day. I do absolutely everything with the kids. He never puts them to bed, gives them a bath, reads a bedtime story, cooks their meals, spends time alone with them- all apparently because he works and I don't, so it's my job.
As I said, I know he works hard and long hours etc, but surely other dads make some time to occasionally put their kids to bed/read a story etc. Or do they not? Maybe this is normal?
Sorry this is a bit long and waffly, I am just so angry and upset I needed to 'talk' to someone. Thanks for reading.

OP posts:
ExhaustedDad · 22/05/2013 14:48

somebody asked

lisac99 · 22/05/2013 14:49

'I, and many blokes are taught we are the bread winners.'

'The ole Alpha Male thing.'

That's a shame. I was taught by my parents that I could be a breadwinner if I wanted to be, a Mother if I wanted to be, a Wife if I wanted to be. I wasn't aware as a woman I wasn't allowed to provide for a family due to being female.

The ole Feminism thing.......

TantrumsAndBalloons · 22/05/2013 14:50

Who asked you? In 2012? Or even today?

ScrambledSmegs · 22/05/2013 15:03

This isn't a blog Confused

Are you new to this forum malarkey, ExhaustedDad?

ExhaustedDad · 22/05/2013 15:10

lisac99

so many options....lucky you --..as a young bloke we didn't get the Mother option, the wife option the SAHM option. We were educated only to be a breadwinner, to get a job and support our family. Options - cripey must only be in the "I am female, I am greater" book of life.
If there is one for how to cope with "I am a dad, a husband" let me know.
Somebody has said you weren't allowed to provided for your family because you are female. When, who, they are wrong.
SAHD..bring it......

MatersMate · 22/05/2013 15:12

exhausted do you not agree a Father that calls his children dickheads and idiots is a cunt?

MatersMate · 22/05/2013 15:13

If you are not a cunt of a father/Husband, why are you getting so irate?

Jengnr · 22/05/2013 15:15

Exhausted dad, rule one of how to make a good marriage is 'Don't be a cunt'

ExhaustedDad · 22/05/2013 15:19

rule one is anyone who uses language which includes C*^t is likely not a good parent.

MatersMate · 22/05/2013 15:20

that makes the whole of MN shite then Grin

Rindercella · 22/05/2013 15:21

Oh do be quiet, you silly man. Relationships and parenthood tend to work best when there is balance, respect and communication. Partnership, if you like. You and your partner work out what is best for everyone in your house.

If you are really the husband, you would be better off keeping your barely coherent ramblings to yourself and use your time addressing the issues you so clearly have.

Hth Smile

TantrumsAndBalloons · 22/05/2013 15:21

You can say Cunt you know?

If you don't like the word, don't use it. But putting little *s and ^s doesn't change the fact that the word you are actually using is cunt.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 22/05/2013 15:24

And, FWIW, the use of the word cunt and the ability to be a good parent are not connected.
Using the word in adult conversation or on an adult forum does not make you a "bad parent"
Otherwise we could say things like "rule 1. Anyone who resurrects an old thread with a load of irelevant bullshit is likely to have poor communication skills and therefore a terrible parent"

HTH

ExhaustedDad · 22/05/2013 15:36

the original comment was "just like the rest of them".
we should ask
did he have a bad day at work.?(who was the remark directed)
did he experience bad traffic?
Sure it would seem he had issues and needed (in 2012)to address them,
(if the comments were honest)
And all fathers should be supportive not derogatory to there wife and children. If a father was to call his children DH, then he would be the biggest loser. But did he
Ct no. This term dating back to 1325 refers to female genitalia, and references too same , so obviously the father / husband is not a Ct

ExhaustedDad · 22/05/2013 15:37

never irate -
calculated yes

Labootin · 22/05/2013 15:40

How very odd
Exhausteddad you write like a spambot.

KatieScarlett2833 · 22/05/2013 15:41

It matters not one jot if DH has had the worst day ever. No one has the right to verbally abuse their spouse. Not ever. It is not OK.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 22/05/2013 15:41

Calculated? Incoherent more like.

BoreOfWhabylon · 22/05/2013 15:44

ExhaustedDad - what made you decide to visit Mumsnet and resurrect a thread that is a year old? You can't have just happened upon it by chance.

TheOrchardKeeper · 22/05/2013 15:44

Bad traffic would not make me call refer to my family as dickheads... IN FRONT OF THEM

But if I was a cunt then I might try and pin it on that/a bad day etc to ditract from the fact that I'm a cunt.

OP, hope you're ok.

Just go on strike, as best you can. Either that or leave the ungrateful cunt.

TheOrchardKeeper · 22/05/2013 15:45

*call/refer - one or the other Grin

Is this a year old? Ah shit I wasted another 5 minutes on MN that I could've used studying....for my degree...so I can be a breadwinner Shock

ExhaustedDad · 22/05/2013 15:54

Pretendercella

I have / am a husband of 30 years.
silly man - sometime -yes
you state the obvious - relationships (partnerships) are best worked out in the house.
but you are here with so many making comments and opinions. contradictory don't you think

If I am really which husband.........???
If my barely coherent ramblings are difficult for you, thesaurus.com/
may help, (may not). Issues. I now realise there others who have limited vocabulary op for uneducated vulgar.
Issues I have... yes you are correct. I should look at these. Which car to sell. do I have to many homes. where to holiday.
I hate isues

LtEveDallas · 22/05/2013 15:54

As a young bloke we didn't get the Mother option, the wife option the SAHM option. We were educated only to be a breadwinner, to get a job and support our family

How old are you? My husband is 48 and has happily been a SAHD for 8 years now. We were both breadwinners, and now I'm the breadwinner. He doesn't have a problem with it, why would you?

BalloonSlayer · 22/05/2013 15:55

So you are proposing that it is perfectly OK to call your wife, children and even the dog "dickheads" because the traffic is bad, but absolutely appalling to call someone a "cunt" because they do nothing around the house, constantly insult you by calling you lazy, speak inappropriately to the children and call you a dickhead because "the traffic is bad."

< whispers > you do realise "dick" is a reference to male genitalia, don't you?

BoreOfWhabylon · 22/05/2013 15:58

I still want to know how ED got here in the first place.

Did he perhaps Google the words 'husband' and 'cunt' in order to find somewhere to be outraged?