The Brave Babes Battle Bus - On Their Way To............... Amarillo?

[Mouseface]

.............. sorry, ran out of ideas tonight!

Hello, tis me, Mouse and I have a very abusive relationship with alcohol, vodka in particular.

Welcome to the Battle Bus, full of totally Brave Babes all on their own personal journey to sobriety. Some are there, some are still on their way and some aren't quite ready yet but stay on the Bus for a good old natter

Wherever you are in your quest to get back control of your drinking, we've all been there too so you're not alone, not by a long shot.

Come take a seat and say hello.

If you'd like to know the history behind this amazing journey, you can follow the links back HERE

See you soon x

Hi Mia, most are done (hurrah!) but still have to do the drawers (including the drawers that time forgot) and the neglected cupboard under the sink.

Phase 3 next weekend :)

Grey you okay?

A dog would be the most fantastic animal to have, and good for you as well. Lots of walks and stuff. I envy you, celery.

Yes mouse I would have polished off 7/8 bottles of wine in three days at my worst. My worst being those days (weekends and holidays) when I would start drinking at lunchtime, have a little 'nap' and then carry on drinking. It didn't happen often, but it happened enough to frighten me.

That's part of it though, isn't it? The fear of drinking and being caught drinking. I am glad that I can't drink atm, but part of me is wistfully thinking, 'well this three month treatment will end, and then maybe I can go back to having a glass of wine every now and again'.

Whereas the reality is that I must NEVER go back to drinking a glass of wine now and again because it will turn into a bottle and maybe a second bottle and perhaps start tucking into a third. Once you have got to that stage, then cutting down isn't a realistic option.

This antabuse is making me so weary though. They did warn me it was a common side-effect. I've always had lots of energy so I'm simply impatient with myself for needing my bed so much. They did say that I had to persevere to get through the tiredness.

Good luck Babes and good night and sleep well. Thinking of you (us) all.

Morning all

Mia I suppose your experiment confirmed one thing for you. It's easier to drink nothing at all than just one glass.

You are getting really good at abstaining on the days you choose not to drink. You have come a long way in a vey short time. You should feel proud of that and stick with it because you know that's what you really want. Because of us, you will never again be able to drink without analysing it. I hope that's a good thing for you. It's been marvellous for me

You'e heading in the right direction. It will come. I am now able to stop at one or two glasses . Never thought I would be able to but for me it was about planning a change of scene/activity after that one or two glasses. I had to 'stop and change' even if that meant going for a nap or out for a walk or just taking a shower.

It took a long time to get there though, the first goals were to decide my non drinking days and stick to them. The drinking days I could drink what I liked but would have to suffer the consequences. No surprise that it soon became clear to me that I preferred not drinking.

Now I choose to not drink most days because it's simply much nicer. Alcohol does not really taste that special, does not really enhance a meal, does not give that kick unless I overdrink and that makes me ill. It really is not all that. And when you realise that you might, just might, be able to take it or leave it.

I know that lots of babes have already tried the contolled drinking and it is absolutely not for them. If stopping completely was the only choice for me I would be ok with that. I used to be afraid that I would be missing something but now I'm not. In my mind, drinking was a really big thing, now I see how insignificant it is. It does not invade my life like it used to.

Those babes who are currently free of alcohol celebrate every day. They get the Boing. They 'get it'. It is a freedom. A freedom to live your life how you choose and not be bogged down with guilt and poison.

Oooh I seem to have gone on a bit

I just thought we could all do with a motivational speech pep talk this morning, ready for the week ahead

Have a lovely day x

Morning all - at last it's a nice morning, and not cold! (well at least no frost).

grey when I read you posts I hear you saying 'I'm going to try not to drink'. or 'hopefully I won't drink tonight'. So I wonder what is actually going on to make that a likely outcome? When I first stopped there were days when the only reason that I didn't drink were because I'd actually made it so difficult - no booze in the house, food and alternative drinks already bought so I didn't have an easy excuse to go to the shops, concrete plans for the evening to make sure I was busy, have a bath and put my pjs on as soon as I got home, so I'd have to re-dress to go out.

I'm not trying to be harsh, but if you're not making those kinds of effort, and if you're sitting in your house with a bottle of wine, then it is pretty likely that you'll give in and have a drink.

As others have ready, things only changed for me when I got really determined to make a change - I just felt ready. Keep posting, and reading, and see where it goes, but the current cycle you are in sounds tiring - I remember how that felt, waking up everyday hoping it would be different, then disappointing myself every afternoon by taking exactly the same actions as the previous day . to you, it's a difficult phase.

Thanks Venus, Sarah, Fairenuff, Mouse, Hopefully, Mia and Celery :)

Feel loads better today. Did the Drill! Poured the rest of the wine down the sink (what there was left of the bottle, which wasn't that much) and had plenty of water.

I don't think I am ready to completely stop drinking. Cutting down would be better than nothing, as would be having a day off from the booze every so often...

Will keep posting. Already I am down from a bottle and a half per night to slightly less than a bottle. That's a minor achievement, I suppose...

good morning babes, and especially grey who seems to be struggling at the moment and everyone who is trying hard.

is it celery that was thinking about getting a dog? I work part-time, we are out of the house from 8.45am to 3.30pm, 4 days a week. I took time off when we first got a puppy to settle him in, and he's been okay.

He probably doesn't get enough exercise, I should take him out for a walk first thing in the morning but I'm too lazy. I take him out every evening unless the weathers dreadful (the exercise and fresh air is great for blowing away the alcoholic obsessions)

A small dog (see my profile) does not necessarily mean it needs less exercise - ours is a toy poodle and he is VERY lively. It depends on the breed, I've heard that retired greyhounds are very calm.

I love him, and being responsible for a dog (and children) means you can't get totally wasted...

Greyhounds actually require less exercise than a smaller dog, generally speaking. Three 20 minute walks a day is fine. They are couch potatoes!

Morning, tis me, Mouse

BaptismGate continues, more on that in a mo..........

What a night! Hours of nursing a poorly Nemo but thankfully, I was sober. I honestly have no idea how I did it with a drink or seven inside me.

His little chest must be so sore, he coughed for ages.

Mia - I can hear the absolute relief in your post about DD seeing you in the bathroom last night. Oh so many nights of trying not to slur, avoiding eye contact or stumble around trying not to fall into the bath whilst DD cleaned her teeth, giving me side-ways stares.

I remember that all too well.

Last year when we were on holiday with DD and her friend, I got wasted, fell off the toilet, hit my face on the bath and split my chin open.

I lied through my teeth to DD and her friend saying something along the lines of my meds had made me fall, or I was brushing my teeth and bashed my chin on the glass shelf above the sink.

I wonder how many of us have lied like that to cover our tracks? I bet I'm not alone in that. I'd hide the re-cycling when someone was coming to the house, too ashamed to leave it out.

Once I forgot and the comment 'ooooh, look, a girl after my own heart' was made about the number of empty vodka and wine bottles in the box, after just one weekend, two whole days, 48 hours.....

Oh the shame of it all.

Now, my lovely aunt has just called to say she'd love to come to the Baptism - should she bring two of my sister's children to ease the load? AAAAAAAAAAARRGHHHH NO! I then had to explain what had been going on and the bet thing that she can do is to stay out of it and bring my cousin and his partner so that her car is full.

That's really bad of me isn't it? But even if she did bring 2/3 of the children, there'd be no room in any other car....

I need to go and sort some shopping out, be back later.

xx

Morning Babes.

Thanks for the pep talk Faire - I would love to be where you are at with the drinking, so it's really useful to hear that.

I've woken up feeling crap as usual this morning - headache, achey, still feeling tired, tearful, bit hopeless. I thought that not drinking would mean that I felt better, but apart from the first week that hasn't been the case at all.

On the subject of dogs, my friend has a rescue lurcher who is absolutely gorgeous. On the days she works 6hrs he stays st home with no problem. On the day she works 8 hrs she has someone come in at lunchtime and walk him. She walks him morning and evening. He's a fairly low energy dog when he's at home, although he needs a good run to strech those lurcher legs. It's not a dog I ever would have considered having before, but having got to know him, he is the sweetest, gentlest dog (unless you're a rabbit or a deer...) and I love him to bits. I know you were thinking of something smaller soma but don't rule out a lurcher or greyhound - they might fit the best with your current circumstances.

Mia Lurchers are fab :) My ILs have had several over the years - gentle dogs with a lovely temperament.

BOING BOING BOING!!!!! im back!! anyone one miss me?

had a lovely lovely weekend with dd - she and her df treated us all weekend, i have had cooked breakfast, roast dinner, more cake (just roll me round the room and call me tubber! ) i did some shopping dh treated me to something (im DYING to tell you all what it is, so PLEASE ask me!) i think he has seen that i have been a bit down of late so wanted to cheer me up.

welcome celery!! nice to meet you!

btw, re dogs (im a cat person) i used to live with a greyhound, ex-racer, he was THE nicest animal, gentle, good natured, not smelly, didnt moult everywhere and liked 3 short walks a day, (he did go like the bloody wind if he spotted a squirrel though!) he also wee'd at 2 pm on the dot, something to do with being trained to do it at the right time for drug testing before being raced

Go on JWN, make us all jealous and tell us what he got you:):)

hello slot!! have we met or are you a new babe? i have been so busy lately that i havent had a chance to properly catch up!

Hi JWN, we have met before but that was under my old names of desiretochange and obrigada:)

ohhhhh!!!! how nice to see you again! how you doing?

Oo what did he get you Jesus?
Hugs to mouse
YY to lurcher/ greyhound talk. We have a gorgeous one, she makes me very proud and is either running like the wind or fast asleep, the perfect dog!
Our greyhound how can we help you today?

well, seeing that you both asked - i got a beautiful clutch bag for the wedding, its a silver perspex and gold leather jimmy choo, long gold chain, really heavy, totally lush and i love it!

see, i love it so much i took the time to work out the 'bolding'!

Am keeping ok JWN, just finding life a bit repetitious and boring at moment, feels like it's just work and bed most days!

Some great posts this morning, really heart-warming and inspirational. I love Venus' advice about strategies for avoiding a drink, my favourite being to have a bath and put pjs on as soon as you get home. It's my day off today and I've been out and done everything I need to do so don't need to go out again. Do you think DD would find it strange to find me in my dressing gown when she gets home from school?

Alias it was me who asked about getting a dog and I've had loads of useful advice thanks. How much time did you take off when yours was a puppy? I love lurchers and greyhounds and know that apart from a walk or three, they're very happy to veg when at home. But I've also heard that lurchers and cats don't mix and we have a moggie.

Mouse I did the lying to DD about taking meds last week to account for bizarre drunken behaviour :( Hope little Nemo is a bit better today. Help the tiredness with antabuse, have you been told this is just whilst your body gets accustomed to it or will it be all the time you're on it? Even if it is, I suppose it's a small price to pay....

Hang in there Mia darling, it hasn't been all plain sailing for me either, far from it, and I'm a million miles away from being out of the woods. Just keep loving yourself and trying and know that you have friends here. And FGS JWN, tell us what he got you!

x-posted, sounds lush JWN, you lucky girl :)

Hello JWN sounds like you had a fabulous time, and your dh certainly knows how to make you happy

Now who has tried M&S Sparkling rasperry and lemon soda? It is a delicate pink colour, refreshingly lovely, and it comes in an old fashioned bottle with a stopper (like a kilner jar). best of all when you open it, it make a really satisfying 'POP' and it sounds like a real celebration.

Imagine opening your fridge and seeing this sight

Mia take a look at him greyhoundgap.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=Gap&action=display&thread=68444

Before I get into my pjs, might well pop into M&S Venus, irresistible.

I brush my teeth and either change into pjs or gym gear as soon as i get home to avoid a drink. Keeps teeth pearly white as an added bonus. Mint and wine don't mix very well.

Had a lovely weekend on the beach again, but realised that almost everyone on the beach was boozing all day, which made me feel a little sad that I can't do that without it ending in tears.

I'm having tooth whitening on Thursday. One more reason to avoid the dreaded red.

Afternoon, tis me, Mouse

I'm back from my time out whist Nemo's respite worker was here, I got my nails done and went for a blast on a sunbed (yes I know all about the dangers of skin cancer etc etc but I've done much worse to my body by drinking and the meds I'm currently on that a 6 minute blast on a low watt sunbed could ever do) as the immense heat helps with my pain.

We have SETH, an Alaskan Malamute who we adore. He's the size of DH when he stands on his hind legs but is so very well behaved (trained him until he was 1yr) and soft, nothing like people perceive him to be. We love him to bits.

SLOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hello lovely! I'm sorry I've not clicked who you were. How are things? How's your mum/sister/family? Mwahs to you xxxx

Jesus, where have you been?

Sounds like you had a great time, I missed you posting but hadn't seen you were away. Welcome home xx

Soma - yes, he's coughing less but is always worse at night, we're just off to a new play scheme run by the church where his Baptism will be.

Mia - ((((HUGS))))) hang on in there xx

venus - my fridge looks like that too, but with no sugar/diet drinks. I'm going to go have a peek in M&S later and see how much sugar/carbs are in it. Thanks. Did you get my PM btw? Re Nemo? xx

help - thanks for the hug, I'm feeling a bit wobbly today, my pain levels are bad and I'm trying to hide it from DH. He gets really cross with the docs when I'm bad, he feels so very helpless and just wants me better.

Anyway, massive hugs to you all, TODAY I WILL NOT BE DRINKING or anything else alcoholic, as my diet is back on following a birthday break

Back later Brave Babes xxx