Starting Again, Moving Forward...Onwards and Upwards ! :)

[Startingagain88]

Following all your wonderful messages of love and support since my partner of 15yrs up and left for OW, my previous thread reached the 1000 post mark and so i'm starting this new thread with a more uplifting subject title!!

Its only three weeks in since EXDP left and so i know i have a long way to go...but slowly each day I'm feeling more positive and believing that my life can be wonderful without him!

Here's the link to my old thread -

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/1421736-In-shock-cant-quite-believe-it-Long-Sorry

Did you go to the cinema ?? I would highly recommend the Avengers Assemble movie for 2.5 hours of total escapism and hot tottiness xx

Hi baby.

Hope today wasn't too bad and you did manage to get out a bit.

I know from experience that sometimes going out and about to certain kinds of events and especially on a Bank Holiday Monday can make you feel worse, at least initially, and you may well come home and have a good cry.

But I think over all, it is better to have gone out and then had a good cry than just staying in and probably crying anyway.
All the time you are expanding your horizons and chances of meeting new people, even just casually, and opening new windows to opportunities.

Think how much better you felt after meeting the lovely seniors at the Lunch Club.

I think tomorrow will feel better when the world goes back to work.
Thinking of you. xx

Hi All,

Had a good weekend all in all! :) After my night with Pinkwellies on Friday, I've spent the rest of the weekend doing stuff in the house and taking the dog to the beach :) watched about 10 DVD's in all!! ......my eating is getting much better (i eat every day now).

Ex has tried to call quite a few times today last time about 10 mins ago and sent a text asking how am i....I no longer trust him....... now when he contacts me i think he is after something (money, information etc).. a few weeks ago i was under the misguided assumption that if he contacted me it was because he was actually concerned about me and wanted to know how i was lol! :) I havent answered....he has nothing to say which is of interest to me anymore :)

Hi Springy, Kirsty and Thermal, Thanks for checking in on me!

This bank Holiday was much better than Easter which was pretty awful.... three days without tears now :)

Oh wow Starting, that is great progress -- such insight and awareness into ex.
Glad you're over the hangover.
Yay!! You go girl!! Night night xx

Well done on not responding to his text. Have you looked into changing your number yet?

And 3 days without tears! That's great!

It really is going to get better :)

Well done starting! Yes new mobile number is needed I reckon!

Mirning Starting! Glad to hear about your weekend - agree that it's high time you got a new mobile number! I think mobile companies can change them pretty shariah if you tell them you're being harassed by an ExP?

That was meant to say Morning and sharpish!

Good morning Starting

Glad to hear you had a positive weekend. A huge well done, for not replying to his text - must have been hard to ignore him.

He is losing control over you now, and that can only be a very good thing for your future.

Ha ha! He'll not like that! Not that it matters what he likes or dislikes, or thinks or says.

Great to hear you've been feeling better.

As for my weekend - suffice it to say I could have done with pinkwellies' wellies!

Ha ha that's great you sound much much brighter!

Hope you're still feeling a bit stronger and more positive Starting.

Any job news?

Well done on not responding to ex. I bet you are driving him mad! You have taken away all his power.

Is your house visible from the road? If so I bet he keeps driving past just so he can try and see what is going on or who might be there?
Heaven forbid that another man could be in his house with his dog!!
Or a proper builder putting right all his botched jobs!

Keep strong. xx

Morning All,

Well when you ladies say they follow a script you are not wrong, over the last three weeks i have been completely ignoring his texts and calls.....over the weekend he tried to call lots of times, and texted asking how i was !!?!!?? (how do you think!?!)

This morning i turn my phone on, text from him 'Ive left OW' ...... right what am i supposed to do with that? I haven't responded.

He cheats on me, lies to me, bullies me for money, says he doesn't love me, cuts me out of his life and i am supposed to be grateful that he has left her?Tosser.... i can see him turning up here tonight if he doesn't get back together with her by then.

I can see it now, been in the pub had a booze fuelled row with OW, shes slung him out/hes left, he texts me and sleeps in his van, they are probably kissing and making up while i type!!

I cant trust him, that has been lost.

Gosh, Starting, what a turn of events.

Oh wow Starting! Just wow!

Karma biting him on the bum already! It seemed inevitable but has come quicker than I expected.
You are very wise and they may well make up but they are on a very rocky road.

How satisfying it must be for you and will lift your mood no end though I am sure you are also in a bit of turmoil over it all.

Things could never be the same though and you will have learned so much from this awful experience.

Keep even stronger.

Hi Starting.

Well, I predict that he will be all over you like a rash, if he hasn't made it up with OW. This will be hard for you, because you may still feel the urge to try and 'fix' this - to have it all go away. But it can't go away, because you know, deep down, who he really is now. Best thing to do imho, is to take the sim card out of your phone and get a new one.

Who the fuck does he think he is, sending you that text. I'm on your behalf, that even now, he thinks he can come back from this. His sorry little life is no longer your problem, so ignore him. It will send him a clear message that he's nothing to you any more.

I'm so sorry that you have to keep dealing with stuff like this from him - any halfway decent man would not keep doing this to you x

Ha! Perhaps he got mud on the white carpets...

I hope you are busy practising your withering putdown for when the pathetic little worm comes grovelling and snivelling back... (although ignoring him would be even better!)

Me thinks they have been to a solictor about getting 'HIS' money from you and they been told there is no money as he was supported by you, and she told him to get lost.

Where he sleeps not your problem anymore.

Stick to your guns Starting you really wouldn't want him back would you? xx

Men seem to have an unerring instinct which tells them when you're getting over them, and that it's time to tighten their grip before you slip away altogether.

You just wish they'd bugger off and stay buggered off instead of returning like a dog to its vomit.

No, if you go back to him you'll be going back to vomit, more like.

Watch out starting, if he wants to come back he'll be full of sorrow and crying and pleading, saying it was a mid-life (or somesuch) crisis; that he loves you and has always loved you, pulling on your heartstrings and your memories; that what he did was totally out of character, he didn't know what happened to him (even, that you ignoring him made him stray ie blaming you).

Watch out starting! He'll probably pull out the whole sorry display and drain it to the dregs.

He'll be full of shit, you do realise that? He's shown his true colours when he thought nobody was looking.

Thanks everyone, he is really showing his true colours now as Springy has said, he has just text again asking if i can 'lend' him £2000, as he doesnt have the money to finish off a job!!

Can he stoop any lower?, he literally wants to bleed me dry, he knows i am not working at the moment and have bills to pay, hes just come back from a five star break with OW.... LIAR...he must think i'm a right mug!! GOD IM ANGRY

I'M FUMING

TOSSER TOSSER TOSSER :)