For LIKEATONNEOFBRICKS

[pollyblue]

Hello,
just wondering how things were going with you and your situation?

If you're still not sure if the woman you fancy has any feelings for you, can I offer you (possibly!) a bit of hope.....I don't know if you remember but I was in a similar situation last year - despite me getting a bit of a 'vibe' from my crush nothing came of it, she told me she wasn't gay etc so that was that. We were still friends, but (afaik) nothing more.

Anyhoo I saw her today, unexpectedly, for the first time in about 3 months and blow me down, she asked me out. Albeit if was a tentative, polite ask but she did, nonetheless. I did a good goldfish impression, I was so surprised. Just going to wait now, not get too excited, and see if anything comes of it.

So - there is hope!

as if I would touch her in a pervy way - I'm in awe with the woman!

Oh no not air kissing. Just put your hand on her, and leave it their a few seconds longer than normal.
Incidentally this is something I noticed about this daftie who fancies her chances. The excessive touching. Nothing pervy or inappropriate though.

and what sort of suggestive comment?
I can't just put my hand on hers, it's hardly subtle! for one we are not often in such proximity, and i can't come up to her and do it! but maybe I should brush against her lightly if we aer passing in a corridor, sort of thing?
Tell her that you aer happily attached. It's not fair on your Mrs.

I'm generally not touchy with people. I don't so it. I'm dying to hug her, but that makes me extemely nervous - if i was touchy generally she could see it just as my habit, but she knows I'm not so more scary to do it as it's telling.

You could do what my WIQ does to me occassionally, give her upper arm a gentle squeeze when you're saying hello/goodbye.

It's enough to make me go quite wobbly

well, as I say, she gave me a tap on the arm in the same way - oh I don't know, I just feel too nervous that my face will express more than just a goodbye. I'll probably be blushing.

She knows I'm happily attached. It's not a secret, she's known from day one. I have never given her any indication of encouragement. Mrs G has nowt to worry about.

but you should avoid her touching you too much, that in itself not fair on Mrs - she may see you allowing it as encouragement. You don't have to convince me, I know that, but she obviously hopes for smth.
So any ideas for suggestive comments?

They have to emerge organically. And sound natural.

Another lurker here who has found this thread very interesting.
Polly have to say you sound fab. You seem to have a handle on things and come across as a realist, and very funny. Obviously I have no idea if your WIQ is interested but just from what you have posted it could just be that she likes to feel desired and gets an ego boost from the fact you find her attractive even though she is definitely not gay. Again from what you have said I can imagine her maybe throwing caution to the wind with you one evening all time proclaiming I'm not gaybut don't think she would be anything more than that.
Whatever happens though I admire your "take the bull by its horns" approach.
Likea Sorry but I don't think your WIQ is interested. It comes across that you are reading an awful lot into what isn't there.
Gay I think you have it spot on with fluidity of sexuality and certainly the way you come across on here it is easy to imagine why straight women find you attractive, you seem very open and honest. MrsG is very lucky.

Happy Easter y'all. [busmile]
TooMany - i love it when someone comes steaming in from the sidelines like the voice of reason. Now I wonder what your story is...
Likea - I think you can only try Gay's suggestions and see if your WIQ reacts in any way. If there's any flinching you know it's not for her. Maybe hug her when you say goodbye. It's worth a pop. And you keep saying you really want to. so that would be a 'natural' thing for you to do more than touching perhaps.
Polly - I agree with TooMany - I think your WIQ might end up in an unexpected (on her part) clinch with you at some point all the while protesting she's "not gay". You will simply have to soothe her and say "I know you're not, now just come here and let's get on with it..."
Gay - I love the fact MrsG is so adamant that she will never go back to men. She must be very happy with you and probably knows you wouldn't take up with your WIQ. (Has MrsG picked up on the bells your WIQ is ringing?) I get the feeling you have had r-ships with men in the past - although I sense Likea doesn't seem to think you have so this might change her view somewhat.

BTW The L-Word is a good series too.

Toomany thankyou, it's nice to know I'm not coming across as a complete idiot And I think you're right, there's a very faint possibility that, if we ever get to go for a drink, I might get a drunken snog out of WIQ, but that would be that. And it would be followed by a slightly screamy 'I'm definitely not gay!' text the next morning.

And I do agree with your thoughts about Likeas WIQ - though Gay has always maintained optimism and I think she has a better nose for these things than me, so maybe there is hope.

I keep thinking of a suggested line from Gay earlier in the thread, it was along the lines of
' yes yes I know you're definitely not gay, but we mustn't let that stand in the way of a bloody good shag.'

Toomany - whereas I, unlike polly, DO come across as a complete idiot to you, obviously . I think you misunderstand - I'm not at all confident that she's interested, I'm just reporting some changes for the better in her attitude to me (and that's a fact) because people here want to know how is it going. There is definetely a lot more closeness than ever before overall. BUT I always say that I don't know how to tell warmth/caring from attraction on her part, so I'm not hoping much - though Gay40 has been encouraging me as she feels something is there. She was on my original thread so she followed all details and possibly has some inutition based on it. I still swing between optimism and thinking she's not at all interested.

polly - you agree that my wiq isn't interested? you never said dthat though, instead you always ask for updates (if she wasn't why would there be any progress to report?)
Loveis I thought G40 said she always has been gay from early age, so I assumed it means she had no r-ships with men, maybe just a teenage snog.

I wish you actually said what you thought polly, I always thought you were with G40 on mine, you always sounded positive .

The good thing is, that if she is not at all interested, I'm willing to just develop friendship further, I won't drop her in any case - and she is willing to have me around. Maybe I'll be another 'pet' (hollow laugh).

Likea - I asked Gay a while back if she was a gold star (=lesbian who has never had r-ships with men) and she said not so I assume she's had flings and things with men in the past. I'm interested to know (not having followed your original thread) - were you instantly attracted to your WIQ? Did you get a vibe from her in the very beginning?

well you probably asked in PM as I didn't see that, am basing my view on what she said here.
I instantly felt attarcted but in a general sense (liked how she looked and everything about her, and thought I wish she was a man) but within a month it took a turn to clearer physical attraction. Just loved being in her personal space (and thought she did too - didn't step away). and not just that, as I said, desire to put my arms around her. It's hard to think very explicitly without any experience, but in a way I don't want to get too carried away in sexual thoughts as I don't know where i stand, and it would be doubly painful to pull out.

Afternoon all. I'm continuing to go up and down a ladder today, so I'll be dropping by in my tea breaks to see how the mood progresses. Mrs G is enjoying her Easter Egg in bed

I too would love to know how many people are watching this thread without joining in.

Likea I'm starting to think that maybe your WIQ isnt interested because so much of what you've posted recently reminds me of my WIQs behaviour towards me.

I'm 50/50 at the moment - I suppose I should've said to Toomany, I've a horrible feelinh she might be right but, as I did say to Toomany, Gay has always maintained optimism and I think she has a better nose for these things than me, so maybe there is hope. And there are several tales on here on women who were 'definitely gay!' then ended up in relationships with women. But there is still so much unknown about your WIQ.

I think all the while you don't know for sure that she is not interested, there is hope. Gay and I have both said throughout the post that until you take steps towards her to make it clear how you feel, you'll be in the dark about her feelings. And I really do want things to work out for you, so I still have my fingers crossed.

So that's what I think, I'm sorry if that hasn't come across in my posts.

Likea - I asked Gay if she was a gold star on March 27 at 12.23 so you must have missed it. Keep up! [bugrin] This is such a fast-moving thread (at certain hours of the day) I find it hard keeping up myself. Anyway, I am hoping both all WIQs will see the light and fall into yours and Polly's arms and Gay's will realise she is on a hiding to nowhere.

oops ALL WIQs

I remember the gold star query - I was too to admit i didn't know what it meant.