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Original poster

For LIKEATONNEOFBRICKS

888 replies

pollyblue · 16/03/2012 19:04

Hello,
just wondering how things were going with you and your situation?

If you're still not sure if the woman you fancy has any feelings for you, can I offer you (possibly!) a bit of hope.....I don't know if you remember but I was in a similar situation last year - despite me getting a bit of a 'vibe' from my crush nothing came of it, she told me she wasn't gay etc so that was that. We were still friends, but (afaik) nothing more.

Anyhoo I saw her today, unexpectedly, for the first time in about 3 months and blow me down, she asked me out. Albeit if was a tentative, polite ask but she did, nonetheless. I did a good goldfish impression, I was so surprised. Just going to wait now, not get too excited, and see if anything comes of it.

So - there is hope! Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
pollyblue · 06/04/2012 20:55

I'm really curious to know now!

OP posts:
Gay40 · 06/04/2012 20:56

Yes, she knows I am attached and very respectful of that. She told two friends of mine, but not in confidence. They didn't say anything to me immediately but after a few months they let me know.
I'm not shocked or flattered. I'm more surprised and Hmm

Gay40 · 06/04/2012 21:01

I don't send the vibes Confused

SaltResistantSlug · 06/04/2012 21:03

Not knowingly...

likeatonneofbricks · 06/04/2012 21:09

G40 - ok not knowing vibes but what I mean is 'vibes of being desirable/attractive'. You say you are not especially good looking and that you never flirt/give a come-on, so there must be smth that you had so many passes made on you. Majority doesn't get that much interest, especially if not a looker in their 20s.

likeatonneofbricks · 06/04/2012 21:10

possibly you just sincerely admire these women (as friends/generally) and they mistake these admiring glances or listening with fascination to them, as you being attracted?

likeatonneofbricks · 06/04/2012 21:14

SRS yes, seeing her tomorw - as usual all depends on her mood. As you see I'm taking a gentle approach, actually when i accepted that it won't be quick, there seems to be more progress.

Gay40 · 06/04/2012 21:16

No, but I'm a bit socially inept, and more so in a potentially romantic situation, so the vibes that would be sent out are nervy.

likeatonneofbricks · 06/04/2012 21:28

but you don't see them as potentially romantic now, so shouldn't be nervy? still, yes nervy could be interpreted as interest. Still nothing is going to happen so it's a bit ho-hum for you, isn't it?

likeatonneofbricks · 06/04/2012 21:30

I'm actually worried that my crush could see my awkwardness with her as being socially awkward, which is not good. We are rarely with a number of people, maybe one-two more so she doesn't see me with others much.

Gay40 · 06/04/2012 21:31

Nothing is going to happen, and she knows this. My friend advised her that I wouldn't be interested even I was single, which is true.

Loveisthemessage · 06/04/2012 21:41

Likea - I was just trying to explain that we can't ever be sure of our sexuality really (or at least as I found out). I didn't expect my head to be turned by a woman AT ALL. I wasn't good friends with her. We got to know each other (texting and occasional chats on phone) over 6 months. It was gradual. I guess I was quite fascinated by her. She says she didn't think I would be interested in her as I was married etc. We just clicked - same sense of humour, taste in movies/music etc and similar outlook and attitude to stuff. I think you should try not to worry about what your WIQ thinks and try and just be your good (or naughty?) self.
Gay - is your interested party straight/gay/bi or what? If she's currently straight it would add to my theory that some women generally are interested in/intrigued by women who aren't entirely straight. I wonder would you be attracted to her if you were otherwise unattached? Have you picked up on her vibes since your friends told you about her? I imagine you have a queue of devotees snaking round the block to your front door.

likeatonneofbricks · 06/04/2012 22:05

G I know nothing will happen, it's just you said you aer on the thread also as you aer curious about her in some way - tbh I dn't unbderstanb why she even told people knowing you are not single!
Loveis I understood what you aer saying long ago - but still the point is you clicked first, you had lots in common but polly's wiq isn't a similar thing. I was talking about her, not my wiq. I am now trying more and more to be myself but it is hard when you already are in love and no idea what she thinks.

Gay40 · 06/04/2012 22:07

She's straight. I wouldn't be interested if I was single.
I have noticed a few things in her conversation that I hadn't before.
A queue of devotees - erm no.

Gay40 · 06/04/2012 22:09

No, I've never said I'm curious about her in any way. I'm not.

likeatonneofbricks · 06/04/2012 22:12

Loveis, I never thought I'be interested in a woman either, at all, so you are preaching to the converted. Examples like yours aer very encouraging though!

G you aer a bit cryptic sometimes - you did say that her interest is partly the reason you aer on the thread!

AllotmentFreak · 06/04/2012 22:15

Blimey! My internet connection goes tits up then I come back to find Gay has an admirer, SRS is under the influence and the "lesbian teas" comment has made a reappearance - which was on the original thread last year. [bushock] Grin

Loveisthemessage · 06/04/2012 22:17

Ha - another straight woman on the turn...

Loveisthemessage · 06/04/2012 22:18

Last comment not aimed at Allotment (welcome back) but Gay's admirer. Yes, this thread is HOT

Loveisthemessage · 06/04/2012 22:20

Gay - what have you noticed in your admirer's conversation..."I'm not gay, BUT...'??!

Original poster
pollyblue · 06/04/2012 22:26

you can't turn your back for a minute on this thread Grin

Likea aha but therein lies the ishoooo - WIQ and I did click, that's the 'vibe' thing, right from the word go there was 'something' there and she has always seemed fond of me, even if it's from a slightly ignorant (as in, doesn't really know me that well) distance.

I mean, she actually ran after me once last year, when she thought i was leaving without saying goodbye. I don't think anyone has even broken into a trot to get to me before....

OP posts:
AllotmentFreak · 06/04/2012 22:31

Perhaps she's not sure what she wants Polly, a relationship at all with anyone. If she's so busy all that could be on the back burner indefinitely. I'd be tempted to email her back with a caustic comment or two but I think it's wise to say nothing.

Original poster
pollyblue · 06/04/2012 22:36

yes I've been tempted to send her a pithy line or two but it probably is wise just to saying nothing.

But then I think, I've got as much right to say what I think/feel as she has.

Maybe she wants me to come back with a terse retort. She might like 'em feisty Grin

OP posts:
SaltResistantSlug · 06/04/2012 22:36

Polly have you defo got the right email for her? And could your messages be ending up in her junk for some reason?

Original poster
pollyblue · 06/04/2012 22:39

A riend remimed me earlier that the only time we talked about it - the first time she said "I'm not gay!" - WIQ also said 'once I've got things sorted out with B (her now ex), we'll go for that drink.'

I just scoffed a bit because I didn't think she was serious - certainly didn't think she would suggst it again 9 months later. I thought at the time that she just meant she wasn't feeling very sociable because they were splitting up etc, but friend said 'oooh, I think she's just thrown you a curved ball.'

I was a bit Blush to admit i didn't know what a curved ball was...

OP posts: