The Brave Babes Battle Bus - On Their Way To Giving Up The Booze For Lent (or just for today)

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

Welcome to the Brave Babes Bus where you'll find a mix of drinker, non drinkers, those who has been sober for a long time, and those who are getting there One Day At A Time.

Come and say hi....... we won't bite

And if you want to know how this all got started, HERE is a link to the previous threads.

I'm sorry my post yesterday seems to have caused upset..... I am still here supporting all of you, maybe lurking to do that is best!

horse don't go, stay and post. This thread is for all of us who are facing this. Personally I thought that what you wrote came straight from the heart - deep sadness about something that is touching your life. Even though we can all read the statistics about the actual and potential harm that alcohol does (god, they're published in the papers frequently enough), it is often the individual that moves us to respond and do something about it.

horses - you have upset no one!! please stay with us! if we all just lurked and never posted the thread would soon fold, we need to hear whatever anyone wants to tell us!

Hello everyone, have not had a good week personally or drink wise. I'm not up to posting properly today but will probably do so when I'm not feeling so rubbish.

Much love to all the Babes. xxx

I haven't bought any!

Tomorrow I will do the same again, but then I will have NO alcohol in the house, I keep telling myself I will be fine and to take it one evening at a time.

Venus I loved your post about How to Not Stop Drinking, it made me laugh out loud - so true!

sunny sorry you're having a difficult week. We will be here ready to listen when you're ready to post again, but please don't give yourself a hard time. Chin up chuck

Dcs asked what was for dinner tonight and I said, it's Get Your Own night tonight. When asked why aren't you going to cook, I replied, quite honestly, "I can't be arsed" . Some days are just like that. Today is one for me.

Yes, Ginger, that's exactly it. One day at a time. Well done you, stick with it. What are you going to do instead? Plan your not drinking. We're more prepared than the boy scouts on this bus you know .

Bought a very crap trashy film to watch, with popcorn and Fanta fruit twist!

Fanta that is peach flavoured, very nice.

Evening, tis me, Mouse

I'm sorry to have been MIA. RL has been getting in the way of my being on the Bus, not that I've fallen off it, I've just been elsewhere and I'm sorry to not have been around posting my support to you.

Nemo is doing great, he has started to sign using Makaton (baby signing language) at home and at pre-school. He seems to be growing bigger, stronger and much more gorgeous as the days go by.

DH is much better, he was so very ill, he was really run down so it's nice to have him back to his almost normal self! Even though he still has a sore throat.... I'm hoping it leads to nothing.

I've been back and to with hospital appts, I had another MRI on my upper spine and chest x-ray, no results of either yet. I've got myself a car too. I'm using my disability allowance to pay for it, now that I have the all clear to drive, I may as well make the most of it whilst I still can.

My pain doc has referred me to a spinal surgeon who may, or may not, remove the disc in my spine that is bulging out and causing all of the pain and wobbles.

He's also changed my medication. I was on 60g of Citalopram, then 40g, and now 20g. He has increased my Amitriptyline to 25g, three times a day. They make me want to sleep within an hour of taking them so I have to watch when I'm taking them, to make sure I'm not falling asleep with Nemo around!

DD is now taller than me and doing great at school, she's a typical teenager but she's awesome too! We get along and I like that, something my mother and I didn't have.

We've got the builders back [nervous breakdown emoticon] to do the kitchen extension. This house had better be bloody perfect by the time they've finished! Mind you, this time we've gone for a professional fitter and installer, not a time limited builder!

I'm so sorry that I've missed the new Brave Babes, welcome to you all, really great to meet you! I hope you've all been fed and watered?

So, I've skim read and had a peek or two over the last week.........

Silver - I'm sending you love and strength to get through this very difficult time in your life. I hope that they get a bed for your mum soon. Be gentle with yourself, you are doing all that you can xx

Ma - how are you? How's DD1 getting on in Spain, is she still there? How are things at home my lovely? Managed to get yourself an electrified chastidy belt?

MsGee - thank you for your FB message xx

Has anyone heard from Obrigada? I've not seen her around for ages....

IsinDe - How are your lovely DTs?

venus - mwah, just mwah. Thank you for being you.

thurso - thank you for you kind words and thinking of me.

You too Sarah

Hello faire, sssm, saf JWN, I saw rusmum came back too, hello!

Hello to everyone I have missed, sorry not to name everyone, I hope that you are all getting through tonight.

Right, time to eat, hope you are all okay, I'll be back as Arnie said xx

Trying to catch up. may have missed something but sarah i find your posts very helpful and your story inspirational. please don't disappear.
Thurso bloody well done on the booze, can offer no answers on the DH front. i think an electrified chastity belt is the way to go.
mouse DD2 is still in Spain and guess what? DD1 is going to go out in August and replace her with the same family! Result.
Having a lot of work-related stress and some bullying going on but all very insiduous and not enough to raise a grievance on...so far.
Not lost any weight at all in over a month of genuinely trying, but managed a 25 minute jog this week so getting better.
Love to all

I am still here guys! Still not been to the shop, will try to be totally alcohol free tomorrow.

In the sidecar but optimistically getting my stuff together to move onto the bus!

Yay Ginger! You're doing great

Hi Ma. Work sounds tough

Good to see you Mouse. You've been missed (although there is no pressure for you to keep posting, you have far too much going on in real life, as always! ).

OneSunny, hang on in there. Keep posting.

Isinde you sound like you're having a lovely evening. Calm and happy

Hope everyone else is OK. I haven't drunk so am feeling good. I can contemplate doing nice things on a weekend morning now, just just late in the afternoon (if at all) like in days gone by...what a waste of time. Anyhoo, I'm off to bed now. Sleep well everyone

Hello, sorry I have probably posted on this thread before (maybe under different names) and probably pissed. Does anyone have tips for not drinking? I am just crap at it, I have had 2 drink free days this week and also had a weird crampy stomach ache with bloating. Honestly I have googled everything from ibs to liver failure .

I do need to give up drinking and I really really want to, but I'm just not very good at it. I have my Mothers affliction of not wanting anyone to know my business/being very private the thought of going to my Gp or AA makes me terrified. Not to mention the fact I have children, I am terrified to admit anything to my Gp incase he calls in ss. Honestly ss entering my life is like my worst nightmare, I do have actual nightmares about it .

It has all just crept up on me, the fact I am looking out for signs of liver failure (don't have any atm) is not a good thing fgs. I read a story in the news (ages ago) about a lady who was 30 who just dropped frigging dead, she had 3 children and had not asked for help, or been known to health services, from liver failure. That really could be me .

Just as I was writing the liver failure bit a balloon in my living room burst randomly fooking hell perhaps it's a sign .

Sorry for the essay.

Hi BlackLetterday (BLD?)
I'm sorry no-one was around last night, but you have come to the right place. You sound very frightened, so have a HUG from me to start off.

You did really well having 2 alcohol free days last week, so you can do that again today if you want to.

You need to make a plan, by going out today and buying yourself some lovely soft drinks and sugary treats for tonight.

If you are feeling ill and don't want to go to the GP - although of course you should really - put yourself on a 'look after number one' plan, try to eat healthily, drink lots of water, have some gentle exercise or quiet time.
Keep posting here, we are here to support each other, I will look out for you during today and especially this evening, I'm off to do some shopping now, but I will be back.

hi BLD and welcome
Firstly, the positives. You found the courage to post on here and ask for help and you had two alcohol free days last week which is more than some of us I can manage, so well done.
How much do you drink? You can be totally honest on here and no-one will be shocked, horrified or judgy. we are all on here because we are pissheads drink too much - from those who have crawled to AA (and walked out proudly) to those who are just aware that their intake is beginning to creep up.
There will be lots of people around to support you soon - weekend days can be a bit quiet because people are dealing with family stuff but hang in there.

Hi BLD. Sorry I missed you last night. I hope you're feeling OK this morning. You did sound quite frightened in your post from last night Maybe the balloon bursting was a sign. Maybe it signifies the end of your drinking. A klaxon has sounded and it is time to start the next chapter of your life - without the guilt, fear and shame that drinking to excess can bring. Well done for posting. It takes courage and can be quite difficult to admit to having a problem. But you're in a good place here. This bus changes lives . Try and plan the least stressful day you can (think about what triggers you to drink and avoid those situations/people etc as fat as possible today). Take it easy and get yourself some good drinks and snacks for tonight. And hop back on here later and we'll all try and get through together

BLD hi, you are in the right place. I am at a similar stage to you but I can't remember the last time I had a booze free night .

Googling symptoms is not a good idea, been there done that. Stick around, these lot are full of great advice and encouragement.

Last night was not too bad. For the first time in a long time DH drank more than me. I went to bed sober, I actually slept! DH woke me up with his snoring and usually it's the other way round. I have a clear head this morning.

Confession: I don't think I am ready to stay out of the off licence completely. I am going to buy a bottle, split it down into two and top it up with soda water. I will have the will power to limit myself to 3 glasses of spritzer ( equivalent to a glass and a half of wine) and see where I go from there.

It isn't quite where I want to be (abstinent) but I need to walk before I can run.

So for the time being, I am ok sat in the side car, but close to the exit til I take the next step.

Have a good weekend x

morning!

hello bld - nice to have you aboard! i think one of the things you can do to help yourself is STOP PANICING!!! your liver is a faithful friend and a little bit of care will go a long way! how about you write of list of all the good reasons you can find to NOT drink, i did that when i was at a very desperate state, it still helps when im struggling to look at it, it brings back all the feelings i had back then and just keeps me on course!

Morning/afternoon all and welcome BLD (I keep wanted to type LBD there!). Mouse lovely to see you back, in full fighting form as usual. I hope the builders do a great job and your dh is soon back to himself again. How lovely to be able to drive again, so much more convenient for you. My teenagers are also getting rather tall these days, although ds does still try to sit on my lap sometimes .

Ginger I have to say I've done that before in an attempt to cut down. I've watered down my drinks to try and halve my alcohol consumption. It didn't work for me because I didn't want weak drinks, I wanted strong alcohol.

I wasn't looking for the taste, or a placebo, I wanted that slightly drunk, fuzzy feeling I got after about 3 glasses of 13% wine. The trouble was, when I was feeling 'fuzzy' I couldn't stop after 2 or 3 glasses, so I would finish the bottle. For me, the first drink would ensure that I drank too much. Because after that first drink I was not able to make rational, sensible decisions any more. Instead I would think fuck it, I'll drink the wine and stop tomorrow.

You, of course, will find out what works for you. For me, I cut out days instead of drinks. I first stopped drinking on Mondays. I knew I could do one day. So I did Monday. Over the following weeks I gradually became comfortable with that and I cut out Tuesday two. I built it up over six months so that I was cutting out Sunday to Thursday and only drinking on Friday and Saturday.

It didn't always work, I had some failures and setbacks but I became used to having non-drinking days. And I preferred those days. I love being sober, hangover free, guilt free, etc. There are so many benefits. Now I am able to moderate. Last weeked I had two glasses of wine. Over the last ten weeks I have had a total of six glasses of wine and that's it. In the past that would have been just one weekend for me. I feel great .

Ginger I was like you. I never, ever thought I could do it. The compulsion to drink is so strong. We all know what that's like. You will find a way, my lovely. You will.

I highly recommend not drinking anything this evening. Get rid of the wine. Get the kettle on permanent reboil. Line up all your lovely teas, biscuits, soft drinks. Plan your evening activities. Use all the strategies you know. Keep in touch with us, and . . . go for it! x

Today I will not be drinking .

Morning everyone, nice to see lots of posts on the thread and good to see you back again Mouse. Sounds like Nemo is doing great at the moment!

And welcome to you BlackLetterDay .

I am supposed to be having a major sort out and decluttering at home but the pc is in the room I should be tackling right now and somehow ... somehow ... I keep being drawn back to this lovely thread. It is a great place to hang out BLD and I see you have had some excellent suggestions for tonight already.

Faire - I totally agree with you re. set drink free days. I also find it the easiest way to reduce my wine consumption. No matter how bad the day, how good the day, or if I get a free bottle of wine in my Ocado order, or if a friend ask me out for lunch ... I will not drink Mondays to Wednesdays. Thursdays are still negotiable. And, like you, I look forward to those sober days in a funny sort of way.

I can't deny I am looking forward to Easter Sunday but my giving up for Lent has gone without a hitch so far. The 6pm cravings are getting less intense.

I think the less you drink the less you crave ... summat like that ... anyway, rambling now, wishing all babes a good and positive day.

Thank you so much for the supportive comments and pm's babes, and I take on board the explanation you gave so well Bibbity. All should remember though that all I am is an alcoholic who got it. A full blown, out of control mess who lost everything apart from thank whoever, my nearest and dearest.

JWN, as I offended you, you offended me, so we are even. All about honesty here, and yes I found your tone very upsetting. There are different types of drunks, some of them exceedingly childish, including me, which is why weeks ago I brought up the Inner Child. The physical part of the craving is straightforward and even the least open minded medic understands that. It's the spiritual bit that is a mystery. So I found your reference although meant harshly towards me, being treated like children a bit ironic. I know that you are not into 'navel gazing' but for me, reading material about the Hidden Child Within helped enormously, and I built myself up from the inside out. Not the other way around. It was my salavation and now my foundation. And yes when my lot are clean and newly sober we start from there. My heroine and friend is very famous in the alki world suffered multiple rapes thinking it was love, all stemming back to her abused childhood, but I don't think either of us have ever meant to stand in judgement of anyone. How can we? I am a gentle soul, and believe that nurture is the way to go, but am not opposed to some tough love when needed either. Never in this thread though because it's not appropriate in text. I get my boots on in RL often and it's draining.

So moving on, I will take your comments to heart Bibbity, and if it's ok will hop on and off the bus taking in a couple of pretty villages on the journey whilst you all keep up the amazing support here.

Mouse so glad that you are back on the radar, BLD, hope that you can have a clear run at systems clear out when you are ready, realisation of a potential catastrophe is scary, sometimes it's enough to get the ball rolling without it actually coming to pass.

I am now fretting about Quiet and Trinity..

Have a good weekend babes I have the big baby coming home for the holidays today will be lovely to tackle hug him later. xxx

Thank you again.