The honing of the twat radars - dating chat thread number 9

[lubeybooby]

Thread got too big so here's a new one :o

All dating, online or otherwise in here please

Chit chat to serious stuff - off we go!

I like that! MEN ARE HERE TO SERVE OUR NEEDS! That made me smile! And the guy i was chatting to has asked when we are going to "hook up" which is as soon as we are both free! Although i am never free me i am very expensive LOL! Life feels gooooooooood!

Well, I'm of the 'just ask for what you want' camp, but if everyone else thinks otherwise, I'll join in with the chorus of "Don't Text!"

I'm not going to tell him he's got an inadequate knob, I'm going with not enough in common, wanting different things etc. I'm not that mean. Although, dumping almost immediately post shag is going to lead him to a pretty inescapable conclusion. Which I don't care about because 'MEN ARE HERE TO SERVE OUR NEEDS!' I'm going to get that embroidered on a sampler or something.

I still haven't sent a text. Rarely have I ever managed to be so restrained.

The 22 year old has been texting me.

The one I actually want to hear from...nada :(

I predict I will crack by tomorrow evening. Or have a bit of a cry. Or both.

I am not getting any of my needs served . I didn't even get a hug on Friday, let alone any kissing.

Dating: I did a shag and run last year and I think I made up a limp excuse about being busy but I always felt awkward doing it. I never had the courage to tell him he didn't do it for me. I cringe now when I think about it because he knew the real reason. I'm sure he did.
I was meant to meet my old fwb last night but it didn't happen as I to a better offer to go round to a friends and flirt with her hot lodger. Maybe wed for fwb.
Was talking to a man from pof and it started ok but then he gets talking about his lack of money and some previous injuries he has had, including a broken neck. The way I can describe it was a mildly deflating conversation. He text to say he hopes his injury count doesnt put me off. I think it has in a way plus his slightly negative attitude. Maybe I should bail out now. He says he wants an fwb but he's already investing time texting me asking how I am etc. dunno.
I seem to have become the female equivalent of the not so good looking male who will settle for no less than a supermodel (in my eyes).
I'm 43.

sponge- well done on not texting. Id be fucked off too, but you just need to hold out.

Snape - any news?

i cant meet up with the second guy - he started going on about how to get women in the mood and he ( not ironically, which i might have found funny) was going on about barry white - hes 27!! then he was saying how hes looking forward to crossing things off his ' to do list' with me, and how he has missed out on a lot of sex and would make up for it with.
Now, i dont fancy being someones experiment, and id far rather someone throw me around the room abit, as oppossed to ' ask nicely if i want him to change position'. Yeah - thats hardly indicative of sink breaking sex.

sunshine - no, its called standards. I have them, even when im looking for a shag. Its not abad thing at all.

sponge Hold out on the texting. I know it's hard but tie your hands together if needs be!

watch How erotic! Would be be crossing the things off this list during the actual act? Orgasmic!

Well, I went to work as an extra for an advert on Sunday night, and met not one but two really nice men. Although the one I really fancied was about 21 Trouble is, how on earth do you take things further? They were both very friendly, and were chatting to me etc but that's as far as it went. They are both on FB. Is it stalker esque to send them a message? I honestly don't see how else you are supposed to meet people/make friends in London.

It's all very frustrating. I just feel like you could die of old age waiting for men to make a move down here.

sunshine I dont think there's any need to cringe! if you're only in it for sex there's no point if the sex doesnt work for you.
Women are conditioned to look after men's ego's, we gotta stop, I'm not saying be cruel and tactlesss but always think about whats in it for you.

Watch the to do list guy sounds like he might be inexperienced and hoping you'll provide some sort of instruction course for him..yeah dream on soft lad

haha at ' dream on soft lad' yeah - its not going to happen. Esp when his list has such thing son it as ' do it in a car' and ' do it on a table' im 33, not 17, ive progressed from that being thrilling and i expect i would be yawning my way through it. No sex being better than crap sex and all that.

milk - yeah. fb them. say hi and if they want to accept you, they will.

not a peep. men!!! Rarrrrrrrgh!

mind you - I haven't texted him. it's text stand off. meh, his record is five days, as mentioned up thread, although that was apres-shag.

I don't think that i'm bothered by potential rejection (hell, I'm used to it..) I'm quite comfortable with 'it's not me, it's you' it just displays a bit of a lack of manners, maybe. who knows.

I'm not going to waste any more energy thinking about it. If he phones or texts, he does, that's great, I'll happily see him again for more of the same. (Although my week is starting to stack up with non-date plans) If not, then not. I refuse to agonise over what I might or might not have done 'correctly.' I will steadfastly stick to the ingrained mantra of 'his loss' if it goes that way. meh.

watch no. do not see the 2nd one, ugh. creepy. I would never mention before sex how long it's been between shags. it just alludes to a lot of premature ejaculation and rubbishness.

Right, seasoned daters, I need your advice.

I've been with Match for nearly a week now & I am deeply unimpressed with the selection of men that have come up so far.

Can I have your suggestions for alternative sites?

he said its been two years for him. I laughed when he asked me.

you are doing the right thing. If 5 days was how long it took before, it might be that long again. So just, try not to think about it in the meantime. And you wont have done anything wrong, it is HIM - not you :)

milk add them on fb. it's perfectly acceptable. that's what it's there for, potential shagging making new friends!

postbellum OKcupid is favoured, still a lot of bellends and chancers, but the occasional wheat in the chafe.

tons of questions though and a high standard of female competition (hell, we're all there!)

I agree, if someone feels the need to tell me how long it's been I read between the lines and get 'I'm out of practise, will probably be rubbish and have no self control'

A while ago I ignored some warning signs like that, I think he lasted less than 30 seconds, I was speechless, got him out of my place as fast as I could and didnt contact him afterwards.
He texted me as if everything had been fine and there would be a repeat performance, I told him it didnt really work for me and I wanted to leave things.
I was actually pretty annoyed, he must have known what would happen and thought it was fine for me to act as free sex therapy

Thank you snape. I'll look at OKcupid tonight. When I did this before I used udate, which doesn't seem to exist anymore. Although there were alot of tossers, it had volume & was just more fun. Match seems very earnest & is depressing me (specially when I think of the £89 I forked out for 3 months membership & they all look like bloody Shane Macgowan).

Still no text received.

BUT still none sent either (go me!) though my resolve is weakening Not sure I can hold out beyond today!

watch, i agree with not bothering with that guy, I suspect his performance in bed would be seriously lacking.

snape, any news yet? are you still resolutely not texting? I think you are absolutely right in the way you're viewing it btw - and you did need to get back on the horse; I was in a similar position last Oct (before my night with hairy back man) and even though there was no repeat I was pleased to have broken the drought. The fact in my case HB man wasnt the best I've ever had (distinctly average in retrospect) probably made the lack of a repeat easier to bear...

Can I join please? I've had two dates with the same man. A decent enough chap but he wanted someon ecloser to home. One thing I am a bit peeved about; he said that men don't mind dating women with kids then cited one reason for not pursuing it is that I have a dd. Is this normal? Have any men turned you down due to you having children?

yep, nothing here either. We are the no-textual-sisters!

In a bit of a funny mood. DD is being a bit of a sulky teenage pain, I'm coming off of my anti-depressants (clearly this is a great time to do so... ) and to be honest I'm starting to be a tiny bit annnoyed. I do absolutely see it as his issue, but come on it was 4th date sex. it wasn't a first night ONS, where I wouldn't necessarily expect someone to call - there were about 6 weeks of contact leading up to it and now zip. I've invested 6 weeks of my time in this! 6 weeks of my time is too high an investment for one shag, however glorious, even after the 30 month drought!

I suspect he thought I was a moose.

Still, one could go mad trying to work out what other people are thinking and why they do or don't do what they do. I'll never know. I'll give it up to the five day previous limit and then go and drink rum & cry on someones shoulder...

toptramp. yes all the time. I view this (as with all things) as their problem, not mine. Their idiot loss, move on. fuckmuppet.

:)

fuckmuppet! Me or him?! I am talking to someone else on OKC. I tend to like younger men but sadly they normally don't want the responsibility of kids. Oh well. Older men are quite fit too!

:) definitely him. absolutely not you! :)

He was very immature in retrospect. And on one date we went into a hippy shop and he wanted to buy incense, a crystal shaped lantern, some dousing rods and windchimes. A definate turn off in my books!

PBB I am also not happy with Match.com's misrepresentation of their wares. I am being winked at by pensioners and short men from around Europe. Waste of time. at Shane McGowan, I know what you mean.

I have tracked down what I think is the only attractive man on match in a 50 mile radius and enticed him into a date. Now I've Facebook stalked him, I suspect he might turn out to be a bit rounder than his photos on match lead you to believe. I shall give him a chance though, he's very funny and I am easily laughed into bed.

I'm sorry there is some lack of contact fuckmuppetry going on. Some guys don't get it though, do they? :(

Oh, I completely forgot. The soppy one is dumped. He rang me this morning and was just massively irritating. I gritted my teeth and said, "I don't want to do this again, you're being very needy." It was as simple as that.
He's been a bit arsey by text, but I'm so not bothered. Phew, that was a lucky escape. :)