The Brave Babes Battle Bus - New Year, New Start, The Journey So Far.........

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse

Welcome. There are all kinds of lovely Babes on board this Bus, drinkers, non-drinkers, part-time drinkers and those who have no idea what they are when it comes to drinking. Some are newer posters and some have been here forever for a little while.

Come and say hi, there are no rules, no 'must haves', just plenty of open and honest support.

You can talk about whatever you like. Your life, your love or even your laundry. We've seen it all!

The important thing is that you can post if you want to, or not if you don't. There are posters in AA and posters who are using medication to beat The Booze and of course posters who are just trying to cut their drinking down with the support of The Bus and the people around them.

See where we've been so far by following this ---> LINK TO PREVIOUS THREADS HERE

Ma - gotta love ya

Your time will come lovely xxxx

oh and apparently 65 is the new 45 - twas on radio 2 so must be true

I am definitely going with that theory - suits me down to the ground, so I shall apply total conviction to that belief

Hello Bohica good for you. Ma you are really special.

Good film on BBC1 tonight When a Man Loves a Woman, Meg Ryan, Andy Garcia, so if you can't sleep or feel like recording, it deals with the alcohol struggle really well in a Hollywood kind of way. Meant a lot to me back in the 90's.

Hello sarah Thanks for the film recommendation, it will beat American Celeb Apprentice

I have a horrible headache but at least it's not a quilty one.

Welcome to the bus Bohica and well done on the 4 days .

I haven't watched much tv for ages, been too busy trying to help dd revise for her physics gcse. Gawd it's been a long time since I was there, the poor old brain isn't coping very well I'm afraid. Luckily she seems to be grasping it better than me .

Nearly bedtime babes, here's hoping you all get a reasonable night and maybe feel some of that boing tomorrow .

bohica if you're planning to read all the BB threads from the beginning - then I guess we'll see you in about 6 weeks time . Actually that could be quite a good idea for a detox programme. Another

quiet (and others) can I suggest a comparison to what you are going through. Some people get addicted to over the counter (OTC) medicines. It usually starts with a genuine problem (such as a headache) for which the OTC medicine is effective. But if the headache is caused by stress, and nothing is done to change the stressful situation, then ceasing the medication results in the headache returning. Over the course of years, the level of medication is increased without ever dealing with the original cause of the headache. Stopping taking the OTC means that the original headache returns, and also that there is usually a rebound headache from ceasing the medication.

Of course none of that makes what you are going through any easier, but you have nothing to feel guilty for. You found an over the counter product (booze) which felt effective in the short term, and it is not surprising that you continued to use that 'treatment'. But I think you've worked out that increasing alcohol consumption is not going to be the long term solution. So please, while you are going through this very difficult phase, be as kind to yourself as you can - don't load yourself with things to do, make your day-to-day life easy for a couple of weeks (short term use of extra tv for your kids, short term use of ready made meals, early night, lots of soothing baths). And know that this too will pass.

Greetings lovely babes

Hi SSSM still here and mainly lurking as I can't get on ds laptop and am rubbish at posting on my phone.

Hope everyone is ok and not struggling.

I have major new. I HAVE MY HOUSE BACK :O !!!!!! The total shitbags have finally taken the hint and gone! One of them went to my solicitors on Monday with a sob story and thought she'd get an extension. He threatened them with obstruction and is going to persue them for loss of rent. If I ever see them again they had better walk the other way..... and fast!...... and breathe......

I am so lucky to have my home back for me and ds, and I intend to do everything I can to keep it a stable and happy home for us.

That includes a dry home.

Right I'm off to read back (again!)

night babes xxxxxx

Isinabetterplace you ok?

hope everyone is ok

Isindie so sorry no-one was around last night, I hope you are OK this morning. Alone in a hotel and feeling so desperate is a really hard place to be. You can do it you know, for you and for your girls, carpe diem, keep how you felt last night in your vision and start again.

If you can sort this out now it will be so much beter for you and for your DC, don't leave it for years like I did (and JWN) until your DC think you are hopeless and weak. It's your life and your experience, but try to take some advice from an old and thankfully recovering alkie Mum!

Inde so sorry I wasn't around last night to chat with you but I know exactly what you mean about little ones and how much we want to shield them. If you are not drinking at home though, that is a fantastic first step because, as you say, they are not aware of it. Mine are teenagers now and there's no hiding anything from them. Keep trying, my lovely, you will get there in the end. You are a wonderful mum with so much to share with them, they are lucky to have you x

I'm so sorry no-one was around last night, Isinde . I watched that film years ago - before I had children - and even then I remember it being very powerful and disturbing. As a mother now, and with a recently acknowledged drink problem, I will find it even more difficult to watch . But I will because it will one more reminder of why I mustn't return to my old ways. Just take the positives from how you felt last night - you care enough about your girls that you don't want to be a drunk, and that your girls are young enough that if you sort out your drinking now they will never have any memories of you drinking. Time is on your side. You can do this .

ma - It's interesting to read how you imagine living on your own one day - I'm sure there are more people than you realise who can relate to that, or at least think about it as an option sometimes ! One little thing though, did you even notice that you called yourself "an ungrateful bitch" - that's certainly not the way you ever come across to us - you are so wise and caring to everyone.

• Take you recent side car posts as a small example !

I think, like me, you're just quite pragmatic - there's nothing wrong with that

Sorry we were asleep last night and missed you after you watched the film IsIndie - sounds like it had a profound effect on you, which others have said has helped them ?

Maybe IsIndie IsIndie side-car ? Hope ma has plumped up the cushions nice and comfy for you !

Inde I am just sad you were alone. The film is one that has been used by many alcohol workers including me, who are concerned with the effects on the family in general. She was scared, he was at a loss to understand, outwardly they had everything. The difference I think with most on the thread here is that they have yet to reach rock bottom like her and me. I would not wish that place on any one of you here. We were powerless.

PM me if you want a chat, either phone or skype.

Huey, WOW!! I am delighted for you truly. You go girl. now that is the best news. You get A++++++++ for tenacity and determination, brilliant.

isindi - you have my number! use it if you wish! love you!!XXXX

bohica - glad you have joined us!

right - operation 'get gorgeous for the bloody wedding' is well under way! - been to the gym loads this week, eating skinless fatless everythings, taking stuff for hair skin and nails, been to docs about me hormental levels, booked a sunbed package (dont worry, i will be be very careful!) in the meantime, realised i have a may ball coming up, then, after the wedding, a holiday and at near xmas im 50 i really want to up my game, i have felt bloody and old and tired just recently, taking action is my natural default so here i go! watch out world, jesus is BACK!!

huey great news!
indie - shit , where was I when you needed me? Are you ok, my lovely?
juggling thank you for your kind words.
jesus I thought you already WERE gorgeous? Can you get gorgeouser?

ma! just lately i have lost my 'beauty mojo'! if there is such a thing my skin is really dry and spotty, my waist is getting thicker and my hair thiner (sound lovely dont i? ) its definatly menopause but im not prepared to give in, i dont want to look 25 again (she lies) but i do want to look as well as i can, so, im trowing myself into a 'get fit and lovely' regime before its too late!

isinde darling, I'm so sorry I wasn't around, am normally online at that time of the am what with time differences, has a training session this am so wasn't there. You feelin ok today? I need to think about how I distract myself from drinking when travelling, am sure I have some good tips somewhere in my mind.

jesus I'm 40 this year. Milestone birthdays are all around. My life is nothing like I thought it would be at 40. It's a good life, but not the one I thought I would have.

indie I have yet to properly meet you but I hate to think of people on their own in need of an ear/shoulder to bend/slap whatever.So nice to meet you.

jesus I am in the same predicament as you but don't have a wedding/ holiday/anything else special upcoming but am not that far behind you in years and too am menapausal (enforced by hysterectomy a few years ago) and have delightfully spotty skin,never had a waist but am thicker than before.I have taken to wearing dresses to feel girly and bought some Alpha H liquid gold to deal with my now atrocious skin.Lets all be beauties together :o

TheBoss aah to turn 40 again not,I like being my age,just don't like what the age is doing to me

Right I went to see my GP and she was very understanding (though I did start with I can't believe these words are actually going to come out of my mouth) and said I had taken an excellent step in admitting I had alcohol isshooos.I told her about you lot being non judgy and supportive but she gave me a bit of a grilling as to why I thought it had got to this,relationship with mr quiet,work,friends....well everything really.Anyway she gave me a prescription for amytriptyline to help with the mood,agitation,stomach issues and sleep problems and I have to go back on monday for bloods to check my liver and apparently I am overdue my check on thyroid (it doesn't work very well) and then I have to return a few days after that to talk to her about how things are going and see how my liver has coped with the hammering it has taken.And she said it might be best to consider no alcohol at all,this scares me,a life with no wine in it.Stupid thing is I have only been drinking wine for the last 2 1/2 years,never touched it before,always drank bottled beer.

Still it's not all doom and gloom today,my eldest ds 23 rang me a short while ago to tell me they had had an offer accepted on a 1 bed flat for £134,500,he is ecstatic and I am very pleased for him,means he can move out of his PIL.Still think it's an extortionate price but it is town centre,strangely he never really drinks though so having proximity to bars and clubs is pointless

I hope all are having a good day and if not good then bearable.

Just a quick hop in and out, this just was tweeted to me.
www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-2105044/The-secret-shame-binge-drinking-mother.html?ito=email-femailnewsletter-20120223

Think we all still have our two front teefs here

Glad you are having liver function test Quiet, and keep on the today I am not drinking mantra, who knows about tomorrow. Glad ds has good news for you. Excellent.

Isinde, hope you're doing OK this morning.

Ma, I keep thinking of things I want to say to you but I am going to button my lip because I obviously don't know the full story. I will trust your better judgement :). Except... if one of your DDs was in exactly the same situation as you, would you encourage her to stay living in that situation?? That's how I sometimes 'test' my own decision-making in my own life - would this be the course of action I would want or recommend for those I love the most? Sometimes we can think/feel that we are somehow less deserving of happiness than others...just saying :) Shit, I said I wasn't going to say anything . And of course you are probably doing exactly the right thing so ignore me!

Quiet, I'm glad it went well with the GP. Good news re DS too!

Huey fantastic news about your house! Yay! Are you back in now? Is it OK? Thank goodness for that!

Rain. Four children? So young, so close together...aaarrrrgggghhhhh!!! Jeez, you have my respect! I have three and they're a bit older and further apart in ages, and they drive me up the wall at times...I can't imagine how you manage! So did you resist the urge last night? Hope you're feeling OK today.

Mouse, are you all glamourous and groomed? Which celeb did you plump for in the end? Are Nemo and DH better now?

Bohica, hi. Isn't it weird when you suddenly start finding a cup of tea in the evening really satisfying?! Tea! Who'd a thought it. Sounds like you're doing well, at a really difficult time. Well done :)

Jesus, I want whatever you're on. You can practically hear the boing in your posts, it's brilliant :)

Silver, sorry to hear your mum's so weak. I hope things are as calm as they can be.

Hope everyone's OK today. Feeling a bit pants today. But at least I'm not hungover or feeling guilty. I must focus on that. Things could be so much worse. I feel the need for spring to show up like I never have before. I need some sunshine and to be able to spend time outdoors. And to hear birds singing! Won't be too long hopefully.

Have good days everyone