The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Joins The Foreign Legion In Their Quest For Sobriety.

[Mouseface]

Hello, I'm Mouse and I have a very abusive relationship with alcohol.

I can't just have one glass of anything, I have to drink until I pass out or run out. Whichever comes first.

This Bus is a place of solace and safety, where drinkers, non-drinkers and those who aren't quite sure can come and post or just sit and 'be'.

No-one will judge you, no-one will think any the less of you because we all have the same thing in common.

Alcohol.

And for those who want to read the journey's so far and the original thread by JWN, the lady who very bravely started these journeys for us, HERE they are.

(PS - the title is just for you notevenamousie)

noteven

Noteven CONGRATULATIONS!

Noteven How fantastic, no wonder you feel weepy. You have travelled a long road. Sending you love. xxx

noteven congratulations, it must be very emotional. xx

ma don't you dare give up. Do as silver says - a good bra and properly fitting dress makes more difference than weight loss. That said, you know you need to reduce the booze to lose weight yes? Would ww work for you if you have to choose between alcohol and food - I ask seriously because depending on my mindset it's either made me drink lots and eat nothing and feel validated because I'm within points - or realise how much of my weight came from those empty calories and address it. 2 only happens if I'm
on the way to reducing alcohol intake though.

inde ((( ))) hope something turns up soon xx

saf we have done two weeks! It gets easier doesn't it?!

mouse thank you for lovely words yesterday (or thurs - losing track of days). you're wonderful and I'm proud to have you as friend. Now (tough voice) you need another day of comfort so settle back

For those who have posted that two weeks seems impossible for them - please believe me when I say it did for saf and i a few weeks ago. I am finding not drinking a million times easier than just having one or two or just drinking on the weekends. Honest. It's a relief to be out of the boxing ring.

Two weeks in - I've lost 3 lbs, face noticably less puffy, eczema improving (did my facepack this morning!), more patience with DD, and despite having a workload from hell for the first time in ages I've started the weekend on top of my deadlines.

I will not get complacent though. Today I will not be drinking.

Sorry saf I spoke for you then and shouldn't really. x

melody hi - of course we can help! Sorry didn't want you to go unnoticed amongst noteven's excellent news.

mouse is normally along in the morning with breakfast but I can do you coffee in the meantime.

Right off to get DD sorted... DH apparently has money so is taking us out for the day - noodles for lunch. Nom nom.

noteven I am so pleased for you. You have worked hard to get here, what an achievement

thurso - not on holiday for another couple of weeks, although there may be some doubt about that. My dd1 needs to have an operation, we won't know the date until Monday when we go back to the hospital, but I couldn't be away on holiday while she was ill or worried. It has been such a tough 2 days. I was working away from home and dd called to tell me about her illness. She was crying and she wished I was at home, but I was at the other end of the country, in a work event surrounded by alcohol. I knew I couldn't stay in that environment to I went back to my hotel at 9pm to go to bed. Luckily there wasn't a mini-bar. By the time I got home last night I was exhausted, and stressed and had dealt with updates on test results from dd by phone all day. I walked into the house, and dp had cooked dinner, laid the table, lit candles, and I burst into tears and had a tantrum that there was no wine . It was a good tantrum, I threw the stuff from my overnight bag on the floor, and I wept, and I ran away and lay on my bed. I am so, so glad that there was no wine in the house. An hour later I was settled and OK, but for a while I was overwhelmed.

Actually there was champagne, and dp said, go ahead and open the champagne if you really need a drink, but it would have been so wrong to drink that under the circumstances. So all is not lost. 2 years ago I don't think I would have cared, and I would have drunk anything.

Sorry not to say hello to others, and to be a bit self-absorbed. I've got far too much to do and I'm rushing out. I'll be OK though.

did someone mention coffee? and where is our breakfast!?!?

don't mind you speaking for me msgee and it's true - we didn't think we could do two weeks but here we are now in week 3 of no. alcohol. at. all! we can so do this.

noteven - congratulations - you have worked really hard for this - well done you

hey venus - sorry sweets - sounds like a nightmare day you had. so glad you didn't open that champagne! will dd be ok?

Can I ask a question please? I have not had a drink since Monday night, after many, many years of drinking at least a bottle of wine every evening etc etc.

I am doing OK with the not having a drink, (mint tea by the gallon) but I feel exhausted. I want to sleep all the time.

And I am itching all over. Is this what usually happens?

Bafana - loving Bafanga, great suggestion , how about BafangaTheSlayer?

MsGee - thank you, you are amazing you know that don't you? Always helping others when you must have a few down days yourself. I heart you xx

MissP - lovely to see you again xx

ModreB - are you replacing the alcoholic drinks with fluids? You could be dehydrated believe it or not. I have itchy skin when I'm not drinking enough clear fluids. Maybe up your intake for a few days?

And welcome

thurso - yes, this si the time of year when I spend most days scared to death that Nemo will catch a cold and end up in PICU again . He has had his jabs, well the first half, though this year so I am hoping that we will be lucky and escape it........ fingers crossed.

noteven - Fantastic xxxx

Or BafangaTheSombre?

Morning and welcome to Melody44 . We had another Melody here a little while ago, so hello to you to if you're reading .

A few other babes, IWantWine, wellies, fairyloo, nomorebeer, juggling, thinice, shake, wannbe, spaqueen, monkeytail, loopylou . . . and I'm sure there were quite a few more, - hope you are all OK. Would be lovely to hear how you are getting on, even if you're drinking.

Noteven what fabulous news! You have come so far and changed your life forever. Well done.

MissP The worst saboteur of my weight has always been alcohol. It really is a poisonous load of old shit, dressed up as a glamorous grown up way to have a simply fabulous time, what a lie. So true and so eloquently put.

I am going to go out on a limb here and say that most of us drinking probably do not eat well. We either replace food with alcohol or eat crap a lot of the time. I am sure that some of us do eat healthy, well balanced food as well as the alcohol but from what has been said, I don't think that it the norm.

For me, watching my diet is helping to control my alcohol intake. But the diet is secondary. I joined the bus with a drinking problem and it's still there. I have just begun to learn that I am not alone. I am learning what my triggers are, what time of day, what circumstances. I am learning how to cope with cravings, what to do, what to drink. I am learning to plan not drinking. I am learning to stay in the day. I have lots more to learn yet.

I have only been on the bus a few months and thanks to the kindness, advice, humour and support of babes like Mouse, Isindie, Ma, MsGee, Saf, Thurso, Venus, noteven, JWN, MIFLAW, bafana, TheBoss, obrigada, legal and so many more . . . I have changed from drinking almost every day, to choosing each morning whether or not I will drink today. That is my choice. It's early days and I'm hanging grimly on but it's happening for me! I'd tried and tried before and always failed. But now it's happening and you lovely lot have done that for me. So thankyou.

And Bejiggery I love salt and vinegar chipsticks

Ma don't get too focussed on the diet, get focussed on the drinking. And have a (((hug))) because I'm being bossy to you and it's meant to be kind.

MissP I love this post - If I could go back in time and meet the 18 year old Miss P, I would sit her down and tell her that she is a clever strong young woman, who has the potential to be what ever she wants to be. That one day she will be truly loved and those people will need her love, strength, courage and wisdom everyday, to help them to grow into be who they deserve to be. I would tell her the truth about alcohol and ask her to try life without it. Man that would save her a whole heap of crap

Isinde It's horrible to have money worries but you are so clever and talented, something will come along. You have your lovely family, you have each other, so what if you have to live off baked beans and mashed pototato for a while? Well done on not drinking (but you are naughty for not posting as we were getting worried about you).

Venus so sorry that your dd is not well . Your dp sounds very kind and thoughtful and you did so well not to drink. Had to have a little though at my image of you (calm, flowing, meditation type person) flinging a tantrum (((hugs))) x

Can I join the bus? I am teetotal now but have had problems with drink in the past. I used to drink a litre of vodka a day. I had PND at the time and it would numb my negative feelings. I realise now it was just a safety blanket for me.

You seem very nice on here.

OK. Will try that. As I say, I am drinking a LOT of mint tea and I am avoiding coffee as I know that it gets me too wired.

I am a bit confused though. I am drinking the same volume of liquid, just without the alchohol.

And another question. Is it sensible to think that I might at some point be able to drink sensibly, and not finish the bottle every time I start one? Or am I kidding myself?

It took me years to learn to drink sensibly, and as soon as i learnt to, i began to have a better time and no hangover. The last time I was merry was New Years Eve 2009/10.
I am teetotal now as a lifestyle choice. I am not boring and love to socialise and have a laugh.
You not kidding self, you are taking steps to address your issues, so thats a good thing.

Welcome to Mod and beak

Is it sensible to think that I might at some point be able to drink sensibly, and not finish the bottle every time I start one

I would say it's unlikely. People without a drinking problem do not even need to ask that question. But you never know, it really depends on the individual. What would you like to achieve? Just drinking on certain days, or at certain occasions?

How long since you stopped drinking beak if you would like to share?

Ah x post

venus - I'm sending you lots of love and best wishes to your DD. I'm sos orry to hear that she is ill and requiring surgery. Please please try to look after yourself too in all of this. I know you won't give yourself a second thought, so how about we all look after you for a while?

Love you xx

Saf - day 17 here, 15 for you and *MsGee? Well done both of you! Bloody brilliant!! xx

I was thinking of a spooky name for MsGee - Didn't we have MsGeepersCreepers last year? Not sure, how about that?

Ma - I know that you only have this dress in the one size, you got if from ebay didn't you?

So, from what you've said, you are kicking ass on the food and excersie front but the booze, as you rightly say is undoing all of that. How can we help with that?

What can we do to help you cut down more? xx

Nemo slept in with me until 10am! He so must have needed it. We are off out tonight to a gorgeous pizza place. I have to admit that last night I wobbled at about 9pm. I really wanted a drink but managed to get through it by having a hot chocolate .

Hello Melody44

What I want is to be able to go out for a meal, have a glass of wine or 2 and be happy and then not a bottle of wine when I get home.

And go out with DH to the pub, watch a band, have a dance, have a drink or 2 and be happy, and then not a bottle of wine when I get home.

And go out with the girls and have a meal and a drink or 2 and be happy and then not a bottle of wine when I get home.

There is a bit of a pattern there, isn't there. Sigh.

Pirouettes in going "look at me - look at me"

Thanks faire and mouse
Loving the new name!

Been busy on the bus today - away to read whats been happening

I know 2 people who go to aa and through them i know practically everything from the income band to the sexual habits of all other members. These two people have been going for 32 years and 19 years respectively. It is a big gossip fest for the oldtimers. If you go, do not reveal any information that you do not want the oldtimers to mull over.

buggering - can you please stop being so negative about AA? In fact, I would rather you left the thread unless you can provide some proof to your accusations.

Actually, I have little doubt that you have been here before under another posting name.

Your comments are not helpful to those who are desperately trying to decided whether or not to use AA as a form of support in their battle with alcohol. Why do you insist on 'warning' us all against AA?

Please, unless you are here for support for yourself, friend or family member, can you just stop with the AA bashing?

I find it very disruptive to the thread.

So,

ma everyone is right! get the bigger dress, good bra and it will all seem much better - YOU ARE most definitely NOT a lost cause, now enough with the defeatist attitude. YOU are the person who inspired me to start running, so stop the negative self talk!!!! Lecture over

positivechanges well done on the one glass and sticking to it, it was never something that I could do. I would always end up leaving the car and taxiing home . Good on you!!

indie so pleased to see you back - you have been missed. Sorry that you are feeling a bit down, just remember - you would be feeling worse if you were drinking on it too.

I loved that phase with my 2. They are like sponges, learning all the time! Enjoy!

cidre well done on Day 4! Good planning is key to me, and you seem to be there. I wouldn't be looking at healthy eating or exercising at the moment, jsut not drinking I think is more than enough to be getting on with!

noteven wow - just wow. So delighted for you!!

msgee and saf when I joined, 2 weeks seemed like a completely unobtainable goal, and you have both done it. How Awesome is that!!! msgee I liked what you said about it being easier just to be out of the boxing ring, rather than jumping in and out. That resonated with me, and I think for me that is the case. Now that I have walked away - I don't really want to get back in again. I occasionally have moments where I think - well it wasn't so bad, but then I read about someone who has just clambered aboard the bus, and decide that actually it was that bad, I think that I'll just not bother for today .

melody, beakin and modreB welcome!

venus sorry to hear about your DD, it's horrible when they are hurt or upset, and I hate feeling that I can't do anything to fix it. But well done on not drinking, it definitely wouldn't have fixed anything. TBH, I am glad that when someone who I consider so sorted admits to throwing the toys out of the cot! It makes me feel that it is OK to sometimes rage against the machine, so thank you for sharing. (I hope that does not sound patronising or twee, because I dont mean it to)

Hiya to thurso, bbwannab and MissP

Hoping everyone is having a good safe sober weekend.

I have spent the morning trying to find a decent sports bra! very exciting not.
Debenhams only had one in my size, and I didn't really like it, the specialist lingerie shop in town had none in my size. So I went to Markies, and they had one that didn't fit, and another which was actually quite nice but it was underwired and padded for a sports bra . So I didn't get it. So a whole morning of frustration for no result, very annoying.

Just made a huge pot of Leek and tattie soup so that is tea sorted. It's very definitely soup weather here.