General internet dating support and chit chat thread

[lubeybooby]

Relationships seems the most appropriate place for this I think? Happy to ask for it to be moved if it's maybe better in _chat or something.

Anyway!

Chit chat your dating/internet dating claptrap here!

Also your hints and tips please for dating in the shark pit on the internet

I'll start.

I'm 31, single and rather fed up of it now. Have a few internet dating profiles, am trying to improve my social life and get out more, even looking out for possible additional temp jobs just to be.... 'out there' a bit more.

Even had a go at cosmic ordering which has been cropping up in dating related threads recently. Now I'm a very scientific and cynical kind of person but when it comes to my (currently appalling) love life I will try anything to give it a bit of a boost. Whether that be focusing the mind on the task in hand or strange unknown forces I care not.

I'm on GSM although I have tried Match.com too.

I have a similar problem to a poster upthread in that I live rurally (not in England either) so there really aren't many people near me at all.

Shiney I loved the examples of your profile - any more profile tips, from you or anyone else?

I was on POF but had to remove it as I was constantly bombarded with requests to be their dominatrix, FOR FUCKING FREE...jog on.

I also get many men who just want sex, and quite frankly are frightful looking. I wouldn't mind so much if they were fuckable because I've tried relationships and I'm just shit at them so the fucking thing works well. Shame.

Might try OKCupid, just come out of a 'relationship', guy was lovely but just had many hurdles I couldn't be arsed to jump, which I suspect is down to the fact that I didn't like him enough.

stayfor have you met him in person before? If not, then don't get too excited. You can get on ridiculously well online, on the phone etc but meet in person and there just be nothing 'there' at all. The distance wouldn't put me off, anything can work for the right person - but don't get too excited til you've had a great date in person together

honinmyo yes how do you know he has a hairy back? Intrigued here :o

PoppaRob Nice one and good luck :o

charlottesmum Eharmony refused to accept me as I'm still seperated... told me to come back with the name of the judge when the divorce is final. I don't think they understand that you can be seperated amicably in totally different houses having nothing to do with each other and yet not be particularly bothered about chasing divorce

Hairygrotter I get the same kind of thing on pof, not all the time though. It's the amount of men who seem, poor loves, not be able to afford a shirt ;) despite claiming to be looking for a relationship, and the ones who only seem capable of taking pics of their penis extention car, and the shocking number of them with profiles that say things like 'LUKIN 2 FINED MY BBE' shudder, shudder and shudder again I'm still persevering with it though.

It's the 18 year olds on POF offering me sex for cash that amuse me most. They must think "that poor old woman is desperate enough"! I generally give them cheery careers advice and wish them well. They could be my children!!

Sex for cash ... hmmm should I be pleased or insulted no one's offered me cash? Mind you I have anyone under 30 blocked on there.

Oh, and Shiney forgot to say re: McTwab... I think I had a fleeting moment of 'ouch' but I was too taken aback by the absolute bare faced CHEEK of him to be too upset. I realised in that split second moment I'd been well and truly played, so that totally killed anything I felt about him. Hence finding it mostly rather funny, especially his panic.

No, I have never met him in person. We are friends through fb and he updates his photos regularly, I know he is a good looking guy! But I get what you mean, we may meet and there could be nothing there. He is booking flights, hotel and car as I type. I have booked the hair dressers .

Hey everyone, Im a lurker but just read this article and think its great advice so came on to share it with you guys, ready for when your cosmic ordering delivers guys you actually want to keep around ;

uk.match.yahoo.net/edito/index.php?mtcmk=080405&name=5/148/2438-five-things-women-do-that-frighten-men-off.html

Good luck everyone!

stay - I say about that because I had a date with someone who on paper was perfect for me, and vice versa. Interested in the same things, even some quite obscure things, same sense of humour, we got on REALLY well talking online and via text. We met in person and had a good date, he put a lot of thought into where to go etc... but 'it' just wasn't there. I can't explain it, no spark at all not even a hint of one, even though we were laughing and chatting etc like old friends, he was attractive and all that. At the end of the date we hugged goodbye and I'm sure we both knew wouldn't be contacting each other again. And we didn't. It was really weird.

Wasn't hairy back Hatesponge? Yes, how do you know?

Honin, the last couple of years has seen 3 old flames (vintage, 2 around 20 yrs, 1 was 10) come back into my life (I've had a few). A couple I met up with on nights out and one via facebook. Thing is that even after all these years, nothing had changed, they still turned out to be short term flings. Disclaimer I am very unlucky in love .

Will have a proper read later. I am not going on dates atm but this thread might inspire me to dip back in the dating pool.

Oh, yes sorry it was hatesponge with the hairy back man. Have no idea how I confused that!

Dammit, why does my best friend have to know me so well and be right with her advice?? Argh!! I've had an ex creep back on the scene. He is BEAUTIFUL, all sculpted gorgeous greek lovegod, and I was madly in love with him until he moved away, was late to our 'goodbye' date before he left (which I had made a massive effort for and had scrimped to pick up the tab for a posh dinner for us both) then spent the whole time on his phone and left early instead of staying over. That kicked me up the arse to realise he just didn't feel the same despite saying he did and never acting like that before. Anyway 2 years on he sent a friend request on facebook and I accepted. We had a brief catch up chat and it turns out it didn't work out abroad and he is back in the UK. He promptly asked if he could move in with me temporarily as his sister was kicking him out. Of course I replied with a stern NO and he understood why. But I was very very very tempted to have a friends with benefits arrangement with him and let him take me wildly and passionately in many, many ways all night long crash on my sofa sometimes when my daughter is away.

Anyway I put this idea to my friend and she has talked me out of it. No revisitng the past no matter how knee tremblingly sexy he is and ONLY pastures new. Damn damn damn damn, but she's right, it would be a BAD idea.

Oh and Shiney, that sounds like a good plan. Don't stop seeing anyone else just yet, not while those spidey senses are questioning things.

Ohh a dating thread can I join?

I was going out with someone inthe winter/spring that seemed really serious until I realised I wasn't that into him. Been seeing an XP recently but all he does it remind me of why he is an ex.

I'm on POF - been chatting loads to a really good looking guy but suddenly nothing since sunday

I have joined cupid but am I right in thinking you have to subscribe to send emails?

No bad date tales but plenty of strange emails. Why can't men talk properly on an email and write words not text talk makes me hit 'delete' immediately

Keep your options open is the moto, until you meet someone who is worth giving up a fwb situation.

Stayforthekids re for long distance stranger, and until you meet he is a stranger, definitely think it's worth meeting up but keep an open mind. As long as he makes his own arrangements re accommodation etc then where's the harm and you never know. I would never let someone I've never met stay with me and would be reluctant to let them know exactly where I live. If they had any sense and manners they wouldn't expect this.

zany no, okcupid is all free. It does have upgrade options but unlike other sites doesn't force you to subscribe in order to send messages etc. Same as pof (but better) all free and perfectly functional without any need to part with cash.

Beware the V good looking ones on pof (and.. well.. anyone on there really)- it's player central especially if he is already being a bit weird with contact.

Lubey, your friend is right I'm afraid see my post about old flames, nothing changes IME. Will add that I only rekindled where we left off with 2 of them, 1 was just a night out. This greek god sounds like a cheeky buggar, asking to come and stay. Now don't be tempted .

adamschic I know she's right. I curse and damn it where he is concerned but there's no getting away from it. Pastures new only! :o and yes I can't believe the cheek of him either. We have had no contact for two years apart from a very brief msn chat last year where he was also cheeky as and stropped off because I wouldn't meet him for coffee. I was with my (now most recent) ex and very happy. He was most insulted that I wasn't 'his' any more. He flounced off and blocked me when I told him too bad, if you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it. (not in those exact words but I had that song going round in my head as I turned him down and explained why!)

Yeah she's definitely right. Pastures new, pastures new I keep repeating to myself. And I do have an upcoming date with the lovely chap I was talking to last night so that will help both spirit and flesh be strong.

Shiney that is very odd. Not buying that at all (the phone dead crap)

Some time next week or possibly Friday - It's awaiting me deciding what the best evening will be. I will text him in a bit and confirm when I know if my DD is out Friday or not (don't really need her to be out but it saves her questioning me on where I'm going and why!)

Shiney, I am intrigued. Something definitely doesn't add up with Mr third date.

If he were a high flying manager, surely he'd have his shit together re a) having a phone which works so he can be contactable and b) having a place of his own where he can look after a 4yr old he appears to have 3 nights a week. Unless he lives in Knighstbridge or summat. I don't know the bloke and it's ringing alarm bells to me.

Have you googled him?

lubey, see your a mum of one teen DD same as me? I feel for you It's not easy dating when you have little ones but it's a lot easier than with teens. Of course, this depends on the teenager in question.