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Original poster

General internet dating support and chit chat thread

988 replies

lubeybooby · 19/09/2011 22:15

Relationships seems the most appropriate place for this I think? Happy to ask for it to be moved if it's maybe better in _chat or something.

Anyway!

Chit chat your dating/internet dating claptrap here!

Also your hints and tips please for dating in the shark pit on the internet

I'll start.

I'm 31, single and rather fed up of it now. Have a few internet dating profiles, am trying to improve my social life and get out more, even looking out for possible additional temp jobs just to be.... 'out there' a bit more.

Even had a go at cosmic ordering which has been cropping up in dating related threads recently. Now I'm a very scientific and cynical kind of person but when it comes to my (currently appalling) love life I will try anything to give it a bit of a boost. Whether that be focusing the mind on the task in hand or strange unknown forces I care not.

OP posts:
charlottesmum5 · 21/09/2011 14:08

OK girls, anyone got any dates lined up this week? I've got one tonight :) Not sure what to wear as it's a Wednesday and feel so wrong wearing my date night sexy cleavage revealing dress on a Wednesday!! Any thoughts?

LittleHousebytheRiver · 21/09/2011 14:10

What do you think, assembled panel of experts?

My Very Nice Man says my texts are not reaching him. But his reach me, and mine leave my phone normally and others are receiving mine OK. He is getting texts from others OK. He thinks his phone has a "cell down" and they will arrive later. Neither of us is paranoid and all is going well between us so I guess it is one of those techy mysteries.

Does this sound possible? Or is he being weird? Can a phone selectively not receive messages from one number? Maybe he has accidentally blocked me?

(He is contacting me by email meanwhile)

Ha! Are the dating gods trying to mess things up?

Zanywany · 21/09/2011 14:20

No dates lined up for me yet but hopefull.

Go with whatever your comfortable in Charlottes whether it's a week night or not. Nothing wrong with a bit of cleavage.

I would say Littlehouse that seen as he is still contacting you but by a different method then he's being truthful. I was always a bit suspicous when my XP said this to me but I have experienced it too.

meltedchocolate · 21/09/2011 14:34

Little, my blackberry did this with someone that I contacted a lot. Only him, no one else. I had to take battery out and start it all up again to stop it happening. It is possible yes.

Original poster
lubeybooby · 21/09/2011 14:39

Discussions of the day Shock

Littlehouse It's possible. I have a friend whose texts rarely get through to me. Or didn't anyway until I ditched o2. I could read them online in my o2 'bluebook' thing but they never got through to my phone intact and often not at all.

Charlottesmum before I give an opinion where are you off to?

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Original poster
lubeybooby · 21/09/2011 14:40

Oh we aren't on there now... haha that was fleeting (discussions of the day that is)

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RumourOfAHurricane · 21/09/2011 14:47

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nopanicandverylittleanxiety · 21/09/2011 15:02

Hello All. I'm still plucking up the courage to start online dating. I did create a profile on POF but then hid it straight away.

Just read the thread.

charlottesmum - enjoy your date!

shiney - I honestly think he won't be single. I had a similar thing with a middle aged man in a really good job (police officer). He can be googled too, but confirming job position doesn't state if he is single. I was seeing him on and off for 6 months. He was as you describe with texts at times but then affectionate etc when I saw him. He blamed it on dealing with 2 ex wives, 3 kids and really demanding job. Said he switched his phone off. I know his address, names of his kids. I don't know his sister, but we have loads of mutual friends on fb. So didn't even suspect he would be lying. However, he is either married or living with someone and I was the other woman. He is a DCI - who is a workaholic and seriously won't switch his phone off. I was severely stupid to let it continue for that long. but he has a reputation for doing it all the time and is a very good liar. The address I knew / went to was actually his parents.

LittleHousebytheRiver · 21/09/2011 15:42

Yay thanks shiney that worked and comms are restored!!

Mumsnet is great!

RumourOfAHurricane · 21/09/2011 15:55

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stayforthekids1 · 21/09/2011 18:54

Shiney, it all sounds a little odd to me. A lot of things not adding up. The only thing I can think of, is that if he is having his DD at his parents, it may be that he is just one of those very hands on fathers that feel they should be there and responsible...even when they are sleeping? Or maybe the parents do something that night? Or arent capable of being responsible for her? (heavy sleepers or something)

clutches more straws

stayforthekids1 · 21/09/2011 18:54

oh that makes it bold. What an mnetter virgin I am. Its nice to be a virgin again.

RumourOfAHurricane · 21/09/2011 19:35

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stayforthekids1 · 21/09/2011 19:48

nothing wrong with a some dirty texting! Just keep your wits about you with him...stay off the gin. Grin

Well my...erm...person will be arriving friday night. Staying in a hotel of course. Gotta say, I really really hope we will have some chemistry, he is pretty much what I am looking for. Is it wrong that I went and had a hair cut and a fair bit of waxing today?! Not presuming anything of course, but still!

Mildly worried about what to wear when I am not working (uniform then) when in his company. My wardrobe has died a death considering I have lost so much weight, everything...hangs. Wonder if I could stretch to a few items of new clothing. Sell a child or something.

RumourOfAHurricane · 21/09/2011 20:02

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stayforthekids1 · 21/09/2011 20:15

I am 8 stone, size 8-10 on the bottom, a 12 on the top because I have a big bust. I LOVE perfume and will be wearing my trusty jean paul gaultier classique. I rarely wear make up. I have some, but i may look like a transvestite if I try put it on Grin

Original poster
lubeybooby · 21/09/2011 20:16

stay, nooo the waxing etc isn't wrong at all :o will help you feel more confident etc if nothing else - oh and during my wardrobe revamp I got some nice, very cheap but nice stuff from tesco, and they are doing £10 off a £40 spend so extra bargainous right now. I got a wrap dress, a Kate Middleton esque reiss dress rip off copy and some 140 denier tights for £32

Men are behaving typically like buses here. Another two possibles I began talking to today. Have spoken to the original one a bit more and just about to text him now to sort a definite date.

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charlottesmum5 · 22/09/2011 00:11

Back from my date :) Wore a black knitted dress from Mango, short sleeves, cinches in abit at the waist, just over the knee, bare legs and high Dune wedges. We met half way (he is 40 miles away). The only negative for me is that with my 5 inch heels on I was the same height (I'm 5'2" bare foot) as him, so I may have to wear shorter heels next time because I like taller men. But he was funny, cute, very tactile....and he text me just now (just got in) to say he thought I was stunning and can't wait to see me again. Wow that makes a change from Mr Warty Grin .

RumourOfAHurricane · 22/09/2011 00:12

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Original poster
lubeybooby · 22/09/2011 07:46

Oh well done nice one! Everything crossed for your next date and beyond.....

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LittleHousebytheRiver · 22/09/2011 08:07

That's a heartwarming start to the day!

What do you think guys? The VNM has seen me 4 times after 2 months of email/Facebook chat. I like him a lot. He is being very keen and devoted. He is now going abroad for 10 days to do his sport with his mates and is worrying I will dump him when he gets back. Of course I reassured him that going overseas is hardly a sackable offence but I have a twinge of disquiet about this neediness.

His dating record has been patchy, he meets women he likes and they start keen then dump him and hurt him. Is this just fear of getting hurt again or something more worrying? Maybe he has just lost confidence.

And I still haven't seen his hideously cluttered house with the buckets of water for flushing the toilet...

HairyGrotter · 22/09/2011 08:31

I'd say stick with it LittleHouse, we've all had a bit of shit in the past and it's not nice when it dictates ones future. He sounds nice, a little insecure but not mental.

I'm chatting to a few on the OKCupid site, have one submissive type on my case which fucks me off beyond belief. I think my profile is a little 'too out there' for the usual client. Might have to tone it down a touch. One guy is an artist, I fucking hate artists, such a shame.

LittleHousebytheRiver · 22/09/2011 08:38

I tend to agree hairy and I am not used to normal nice men after years of Mr Twisty.

Of course he is worried, I am a pearl of great price and he has only just met me and can't believe his luck! Wink He wears his heart on his sleeve and any thoughts he has pop out of his mouth so he is unable to hide his anxieties.

I will look forward to welcoming him home again!

LittleHousebytheRiver · 22/09/2011 08:47

and Hairy what on earth does your profile say? I'm imagining leather and whips...

You could put in "No Artists" and I could put "No absent minded professors need apply!"

HairyGrotter · 22/09/2011 08:47

He sounds nice, good for you :) Enjoy the homecoming