To paraphrase Hunter S Thompson: "Internet dating is a dark, plastic hallway; where pimps and thieves run free, and good people die like dogs. There's also a negative side."
stayforthekids1: You're a couple of years younger than my daughter, so I hope you don't think I'm being a creepy old letch, but you're a good looking woman and that top with the jeans and boots would look great! As Billy Connolly would say "windswept and interesting".
LittleHousebytheRiver: You said "Language is a tricky thing. One person's seductive chat up is another's nightmare." Exactly! Especially on chat we sometimes take the risk and cross a line. Often the other person goes with the flow. Sometimes they get offended. We don't go out of our way to offend, but with no other feedback all we can do is hope the other person is on the same wavelength.
If you were sitting at a bar hearing comments (like Fairyloo's response to her bloke) on this thread you'd let them pass without a second thought. Because they come upon the screens of our PCs or mobile phones we get all deep and meaningful and look for stuff that often just isn't there. In real life we'd have been too busy listening to the flow of conversation to worry about one small comment. We've all been blown off or stood up on planned dates or meets. Should we invest a lot of time and effort trying to read more into the other person's agenda, or should we just accept that either "plan A" came through and we're plan B or C or maybe even D, and send a quick reply "Sorry to hear about your sick child. Hope they get well soon." or "What a shame your car has broken down. Let me know if I can do anything to help." After a few years on dating sites I just let it slide? Life's too short.
As for the photos... the flipside of the bare chested blokes and blokes with fish or motorbikes are the studio shots of the larger woman with rosy cheeks and lots of lacey/net stuff around the shoulders and the puppies proudly on display, the chicks on motorbikes (hint: if you want us to think it's your bike maybe scuff the toes of the boots a bit?), and what's with the only pic being one of your shitzu? We also don't buy the "I don't have a photo because I'm so well known and I value my privacy" or "I believe true beauty comes from within. I don't judge people on looks." We cheerfully accept that you've taken 3 years off your age, you've put your size down as average and you've added a few inches to your height, but exaggerate too much and when we meet you we'll peg you as a liar. I have 3 pics on my Rob_Sellicks profile on OkCupid... one in a suit from my daughter's wedding last year, one of me playing guitar at a local surf club (don't get too excited - I'm crap at it) and another head and shoulders one. They show me as I think I am. Disclaimers: Your mileage may vary, contents may settle, serving suggestion only, etc.
As an older (54 yesterday.... fucking ouch!) person I have to accept that I have an exaggerated sense of my appeal and to other people it may seem I come with problems. In our younger days we would tolerate a lot because the people we were interested in were hot and worth it, but now because we've gained some experience and have some standards and expectations we find a lot of people of our age bring very little to the table other than showing up at their convenience, living in the past, and thinking they have what it takes to motivate a person to romance and assertiveness with their little games where a person is expected to jump through hoops and do tricks to show they're worthy. Gorgeous twenty year olds can command that kind of attention... obese middle aged people cannot. We older men stay single because we survived the first few waves of moronic twits and we'll be damned if we're going to give up what we have now to put up with bullshit!
I've often thought I should do the dark and mysterious attitude thing and be Mr Cool - but it's just not me. Sometimes I think my lot in life is to be an accommodating doormat to a succession of people who'll cheerfully accept what I can do for them and rejoice in the fact that I make few demands. By the time you get to my age you wonder why the hell you even bother... then someone gives you a cuddle or maybe even a kiss and it feels so fucking good to have that human contact that you think maybe, just maybe, this one will be different so you lower your defences and do it all again, but the best indicator of future behaviour is past behaviour - we make the same mistakes time after time.
And that's my take on Internet dating. Sorry it's longwinded but my grand-daughter's tucking into her brekkie so I finally had time to add my thoughts! :)