Anyone had an affair and not regreted it?

[kitty1]

I had fling with someone and never have regretted it. It helped me realise that my marriage was well and truly over and i couldnt go back.
By the point i had this fling my ex h and i hadnt had not been having sex because he had some issues he coudnt/wouldnt deal with.

I read some where once that when a woman emabarks on affair she has mentally packed her bags and left the relationship , when a man does it its usually because he is bored and craves excitement.

Anyone here feel the same?

I don't know WWIFN but reading this has been horrible. It's a character assassination and it's vile.

I know who I now think highly of now and who I know to avoid as a nest of vipers.

OMG are these vile bastards still justifying their skank behaviour? the way they treated wwifn - unforgivable.

Ginger! My Goodness! You are upset and angry! There is no need, really.
I think they removed the 'support' thread because posters were getting very cross and insulting.

Shirley please calm down. I believe the issue arose because a poster claimed it "tasteless" to discuss being on the other side of an affair. Please Please wise up - seriously. I personally was mentioned by the poster you are are now defending who highlighted that - in a previous post - she had not accused me of being the other woman - as if it was a bonus not being accused of something that was untrue? not rational at all if you ask me

All posters shoudl be able to speak their mind but if you say something inflammatory and try to dictate what is being said they you are going to run into trouble.

Aisling havent gotten that email yet, must be on route though.

Oh dear Aisling, I would be very surprised if MNHQ said anything of the sort.
My goodness me, your posts are starting to seem verging on the obsessional.

Shirl you are a-m-a-z-i-n-g for standing up to these posters.

I'm perfectly calm "debs"!

I know it suits you to portray anyone who calls you on your behaviour as "hysterical" or "needing to calm down" but really, my dear, I think you might need to have a couple of words with yourself. Someone saying that something is "tasteless" is a million miles away from the harranguing bullying that has occured on this thread.

Guys can we drop it - seriously, this post is about supporting people with reference to affairs. We are all never going to agree on certain topics or posters. Having a go at each other non-stop isnt getting us anywhere.

Can we get back to the point really. Can I ask of the OW/OM on here, have any of you had happy relationships come out of the affairs, ie did you set up home/relationship with the person you had the affair with?

"guys"

Phew! dedurca!
Yes, get back to the point.( All that unhealthy anger!)

Shirley people gave their opinion on another poster - who it was felt - overstepped herself on her advice. It was also noted that this poster helped many people - just not all - and that in fact sometimes it wasnt good for someone to constantly live in the midst of somethign that was obviously so life changing for them.

Can I ask what it was about my behaviour that you felt I needed called on? I gave my opinion. No one has the right to decide what is discussed on here, not me - not you. I dont need to discuss anything with myself - I stand by what I said, no one has the monopoly on advice adn I do think its wrong to challenge someone whom you dont know well enough, ergo you dont know how much that person can take

And please stop with the my dear business - its just silly - it reminds me of the nuns in school sistershirley lol

debs, you're not allowed to say'guys', didn't you know that? Shirley will have another tantrum now.....take cover!

Yes I have. As I said further up the thread (but feel the thread lost its way a bit in the middle) had affair, ended it with OM, split with husband, on my own for around 6 months, dated other people, now back with OM and very very happy.

Sorry - apologies - would ladies suffice? lol Whats the issue now Shirley - should I reference it with ~My dears? lol, you actually make me laugh - (and the lady sitting next to me) no mean feat for this time of the evening

Sorry justforthisonepost - i didnt read that correctly before. im delighted that you are happy and things have worked out for you.

I know when my first marriage split it took me ages to try and get my head around things, then I was clearer after that. I was only when I left that I realised how unhappy I had been and how much it had changed me.

x

Deb

Did you know that going on about me having temper tantrums doesn't faze me one little bit?

It is interesting to note how personal you get when someone calls you on your behaviour though. Almost as if you don't like some speaking their mind freely!

The irony!

ghastly people and awfully childish too

you know who you are

Deb - the only advantage of having had a father who was a complete pain in the arse is that I have pretty much zero tolerance for any kind of mysogynistic/chauvenistic behaviour. My partner feels pretty much the same though. We have talked about this sort of thing a lot and I think he takes the view that when a woman is unfaithful there is a often a good reason for it whereas for a man, sometimes, it can be a scalp on the bedpost. Also, in general women seem to feel incredibly guilty and accomodating (going to counselling/striving to be perfect mothers etc) whereas (some) men seem to go in for this gas-lighting thing which I think is completely unforgivable - worse than the affair itself.