Dumpling no more - only the strong survive and we did No.3

[Teaandcakeplease]

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live without him by my side;
But then I spent so many nights
Thinkin' how you did me wrong
And I grew strong

This thread is for ex dumplings. Any dumpling that feels like she has "mostly" moved past crisis into an "almost" sorted state can post and chat here as we continue our quest for serenity with a lot of laughs along the way and support.

I'm just imagining Mrs Foxes face when Mr Fox brings home two frozen pheasants for dinner

Yeah she'll be like "Oh lord, we'll never eat all that and I haven't got any recipes for pheasant. Stick em in the freezer and go and get some stuff from the bin instead, you useless bugger!"

Just finshed watching a film called leap year....I want an irishman (swoons) ah feck it I just want a kiss....I wanna be a brazen hussy lol have been that a few time no sex for 6 weeks the doctor said, think that's making me want it more
I should have asked if it was a promise that i'd get some in 6 weeks time lol

Oh don't Sov...it's getting very springlike here and the sap is rising...with nowhere to go!
Exbf has put all his new recordings of "sounds in the village" on fb. These include wind in a tree, some kid on a pogostick, a rabbit eating breakfast (cocopops?) and someone whistling. With the advice "Headphones recommended when listening as these sounds are binaural" EH?!!!!!!

Decided to go on eharmony, after Patience's counsellor said it was a good site. So haven't paid but have completed all the questions to find my ideal match. In the whole world there are...4. Yes. 4. I'm either very very "special" or a complete fecking nightmare!

My mate tried eharmony and she had no matches what so ever, felt so sorry for her but it did put me off

Sov - glad you're feeling a bit better love xxx
Ach - these sites with psychological questions and stuff - chemistry is what's needed and that comes in many surprising guises!
Miss exbf tonight. I know he's a wanker. Just miss the bones of him.

Goo @ Mrs Fox

When I was on that site they matched me up with a 4" 8' lorry driver FFS

Goo @ Mrs Fox

When I was on that site they matched me up with a 4" 8' lorry driver FFS

hello everyone,
Long time no postings from me. so here I am -in a hurry stuffing my life into bags boxes and wellies and bidding Glasgow goodbye in 9 days eeeeek! I had a v reasonable chat with x last night about access and arrangements so that is a big relief. hopefully there won't be anymore rows. mum and my brother are coming at the weekend to help me pack and to take two of my boys home with them first. i just want to engineer it that their paths and my x's do not cross. not that anything would happen. i just don't want any atmospheres.
I had a lovely time with Patience and Googomama on saturday in glasgow. - two interesting, funny strong and really bonny lasses. some men just don't know they're born. anyway thanks for some great chats and laughs.
You know today as i was telling someone about our split I could have sworn I saw a wee flash of envy of the single life in her eyes. Single parenthood has lots of bonuses.
Anyway I need to sleep. take care everyone and i'll catch up later this week.
:)

Googoo - I used to get e-mailed everyday several. It's almost like rather than giving you them all in one go they drip feed them. It was too pricey for me. I was also not ready for it.

Off to bed. Lovely to see you Maybee on here x

Just catching up after long night at college.

Sov, glad you're feeling a bit better but find it so hard to think of you trapped with so little support. I will be praying that you find the life you deserve soon.

Patience, as you know I've been reading angel cards for years & follow the numbers signs etc but obviously am not very good at it as when I've done readings around Norm I interpreted them to mean he was coming back!! Don't mean to put you off though by my lack of ability lol

Goo, did I mis-read when you posted two nights ago that you were giving up dating & men for awhile . So relieved to see someone changeable like myself on the thread

Pink, great idea to feed pheasants to foxes

Tea, glad you're a bit perkier today. I'm loving the image of you flinging pheasants from your balcony

ET, plod certainly sounds v anal indeed, can't imagine him being too adventurous in the sack . Would probably need to have a schedule for sex too, perhaps every alternative fri night . Oh God forgive me for being so judgemental of a poor stranger who just likes to plan his meals in advance .

Maybee, good luck with the packing & lovely that your family are travelling over to help you out . Best of luck in your new home.

Getting, so lovely to see you getting excited about your new house. I'm sure when you've settled in properly & the sunny season is making you feel more frisky then you will embrace the whole concept of dating once more . You are correct that Norm never contacted me again, I've given up on it now, too long has passed. Tbh though in a way I still can't believe it he was planning a whole future with me & then bam, he was gone!!

Well I'd forgotten who had mentioned eharmony so glad to be reminded that I can blame Patience for me wasting about 40mins filling up a crap questioneer only to be told at the end of it all that I couldn't be matched as a legal separation doesn't count as divorce

Yes me 2 starting LOL,got a message ,try again when ur divorced !

LOL read that to mean you got a message from ANGELS saying try again!!! Dah, just figured you were actually talking about eharmony

Cant belive eharmony - so sorry you dont meet its high standards

helloooooooooo Maybee

and everyone else

Sorry Im being totally selfcentred at the moment. H is trying hard in somethings at the moment, in others he is awful. he is driving me nuts tbh. Back sweating like crazy like the first few months. Dont know what to do. Thank god seeing counsellor friend at the weekend.

Think just have to detach more and more.

Friends has just told me what a social life he has at the moment too -so that makes me fed up too. Dont know if he really does actually but just hearing it is upsetting.

Grrr.IM on the rollercoaster again.........

And ET that plod was actually a bit scary to me so glad youve given him the swerve

And Tea - foxes lol how I love them [not] but yes I would use them as natural rubbish bins :)

Big hugs mf ,I had this Jan and Feb,very emotional.pushed me towards more healing and in the end a clearer picture.hope we can meet up in the summer.healthy selfish is highly recommended IME,all new to me but very good ,its what was missing in my life .
Listening to adele feel my love.a bit ott but a real new start ,new man song,bit obsessive.I like the line "the winds of change are blowing wild and free ,u ain't seen nothing like me yet."
Obviously cried lots too for X ,but starting to fill my head with SB rather than X.its just life innit.still shake my head and think Why ? But it happened we all have to roll with it and we are .

Lol about try again after divorce starting.want to see u too this year need to have a mega meet up for my 40th.
I couldn't have done it without ya ,many thanks to everyone who ever posted to me .I would have gone under without u.on behalf of me and my children ,THANKYOU !

Pink you are funny tho...............Do try again on eharmony -for our entertainment please

Patience - youve given more than youve ever received -thank you!

And yes yes yes without the folk Ive met who have gone through it/going through it I would have gone mad!Other people however fab just cant understand it at all!I dont discuss it hardly at all with anyone now.

And yes to meetup -when is your 40th?

Its a lovely day today thank goodness. And yes have a few good things to look forward to over next few months.

My life used to be so swear swear simple -and now its so complicated. Urghhhhhhhh!

Patience sounds like your weekend was a breath of fresh air - keep going upwards

Mumfun this will pass just go with it, its a nasty surprise that these phases can come back to us after a period of serenity

Elsie at your date give a very wide berth, my freezer is useful for chilling wine quickly when I have stupidly thought I wont bother with any on a particular evening

Sov hope you are feeling a bit better

Mum has just caught her train. We went for a walk earlier and she was talking a lot about the old xh what a nice happy man he was in years gone by which made me a bit sad and then she was clearly upset leaving saying its the last time of visiting me in this house end of an era etc which I wasnt prepared for.

Feeling tearful and empty off to maths

Waves to everyone and hoping the sunshine is making you all feel sunny

Its just all part of the journey for getting,new house ,my nana,93 ,said aw that's a shame I liked X .its just the modern way.I said nana there was a lot of blackness there.she said ah well,chin up pet.
Start of August for my birthday mf.
Listening to adele on repeat ,on barbie stereo.
Turns out its a bob Dylan song.loads of red co dependant flags ,she needs to take some control back.why would u want to be with someone that hurts u.only go to the ends of the earth for someone if ur sure its going to be reciprocated.

Re the wanton hussy bit. my post break up sex has only been with my RR. psychologically ,sex with a real bloke would have been out of bounds ,just don't need my head fucked with anymore .but need to broaden my horizons now ,can't have a battery operated sex life forever.

Getting, sorry the conversation with your mum made you feel low. At least you can look back at some happy times. It's not like she had to say, you're well rid of that wife beater who made you homeless umpteen times. Your life with H wasn't in vain. And although you feel low and unsettled now you are going to be on such a massive high when you move into the new house. I've been feeling somewhat blue these last few days too. I know I joke about the plod, and I'm probably being very mean about him, but sometimes it's silly little things that set me off feeling nostalgic because XP and I did have some good times too. Yesterday, I was with Wallace in the park opposite our house at 6pm. It was a beautiful sunny evening and I started remembering the times when I would take toddler ds to the park after his dinner and XP would pull up after work and join us before we all ambled home together. I felt utterly bereft. That's what it is; grief. I don't want him back, I want those times back. So I keep giving myself a stiff lecture about not confusing the two things.

Mumfun, sorry things are hard for you too. I think it is especially hard for those dumplings with much younger dc. You've got such a lot on your plate and it only serves to underline how selfish some of these men are. Not saying your H is selfish but he's just not going through what you are. Most of these men couldn't walk 10 yards in our shoes.

Patience, you sound like a new woman. It's fantastic. Long may it continue .

Sov, hope your recovery continues without any hiccups. And don't forget your emotional recovery from the op that you've had. Take special care of yourself.

Big wave to Starting, Tea, Pink, GGM, Maybee and everyone else. Hope you've all got this lovely sunshine.

Thanks Patience lol at your gran

Elsie you are quite right and I think I have said before how I strive to stick to the attitude that our marriage had lots of pluses and happy memories and how that has to be a healthier outlook. As you say if I were to find myself pining for xh it wouldnt be for the man I spent the last few years with but the one I started out with . I wonder if he is available to ow or whether the changes in him went deep enough that she lives with a slightly improved version of him.

I rang him earlier as the solicitor rang wanting something. He hasnt been in any touch apart from a very brief functional text last friday after my email last wednesday. He was "very busy" and slightly offish. I am surprised he hasnt addressed anything about what I wrote to him and I think a friend of mine was right in saying if he doesnt respond he is a very small man. I like to think I really touched a nerve and he actually doesnt know how to face me with an answer rather than he thought it was nonsense and couldnt be bothered.

Anyway blah blah blah

Just one of those moods

Thanks Elsie,all part of the grieving as u know to remember the nice bits but ultimately I console myself with the fact they just didn't make the grade x