Dumpling no more - only the strong survive and we did No.3

[Teaandcakeplease]

At first I was afraid, I was petrified
Kept thinkin' I could never live without him by my side;
But then I spent so many nights
Thinkin' how you did me wrong
And I grew strong

This thread is for ex dumplings. Any dumpling that feels like she has "mostly" moved past crisis into an "almost" sorted state can post and chat here as we continue our quest for serenity with a lot of laughs along the way and support.

Hi everyone. Starting - what a confusing man! Hope it hasn't spoilt your day. Elsie - loving the M and S dinner - I love their food :)
Not sure what to write about things that happened on here last night but I'm afraid to say that I think that it got out of hand. This is a safe place for us all to "download" our problems and to empathise with others' experiences, even if they are outside of our own. Last night Patience was trying to explain her situation - which I think is pretty damn hard - and I don't think it was helpful for her to be told that she isn't the only one going through problems. We all know that others are going through / have been through / will go through a variety of marital woes but that doesn't make it less painful when it happens to us. For someone to leave a thread because they no longer find it a safe place to post is very sad and I don;t think anyone would want her to do this - we are all a very supportive group. Of course people can write what they think in response to others' posts but I think that if you realise that someone has been upset by something that has been said, it is always good to then reassure that person or message them and either check they are alright or apologise. I for one would be sad if Patience didn't come back - she is a very helpful, wise and strong lady and I would miss her.
Just a few thoughts. IMO Patience is over her ex. She knows he is with someone else. She is simply trying to get him to pay her maintenance and see his kids for their sake and noone else's.
Well, didn't see my kids until 5.30. Bit of a down day and now back trying to bloody work but I'm knackered. Really looking forward to seeing drummer man in holidays. And this is the new, kick ass Googs. No more being too understanding/nice/ fitting in! :)
Waves to all x

Hi Romney - some tough things there to get through and you did! I know that sinking feeling too - and how grim to be faced with picture of your ex. Good on you for getting through it. You still want to visit in the summer? I'd love to see you x

Oh Starting I'm so sorry, he's practically bi polar or multiple personality. What a nutter.

Elsie that sounded lush.

Helloooooo Romney . We're doing ok, aren't we?
Starting, are you able to shrug his behaviour off? There's no rhyme or reason, is there? Hope it hasn't got you down or spoiled the day.
GGM, forget the work and get to bed. Since XP left my bedtime has gradually got earlier and earlier and I feel so much better for it .

Well majority seem to agree it wasn't me then . Thanks. Tea, he was diagnosed with bi polar several years ago but then said it'd been an error . Tbh I'm not sure about bi polar but her does certainly now have MH issues & I try to make allowances for this but it gets so frustrating some times.

Glad everyone seems to have had a nice day.

Patience, hope you will come back to the thread again. I think nobody is happy about what happened on the thread last night. At the end of the day we've all just tried to help & support each other with the crap we have to deal with. Would be lovely if you came back & thread moved on in it's usual positive manner.

Oh Rom, last night must have been so hard having to look at xh's pics. Worse at a time when you've had the emotional upheaval of ds moving out ((Hugs))

Kate, am loving your skinny jeans story

Tea, you so deserved that champagne

Pink, £40 last year so that's next 5 yrs covered Dc's !! You just gotta love em

Goo, hope you got work done. I'm still struggling with an assignment due tomorrow!!

Getting, glad you enjoyed your day despite the battles of dc's

ET, M&S hmmm lovely & lol at how good you can read xp now. It becomes so easy after awhile doesn't it.

Happy, hope you enjoyed the rest of your day

Mumfun, likewise hope you had a lovely day

Sov, hope you're feeling better & that you managed to get some bit of a break today

Probably forgetting someone but tis late so forgive me

Morning

Patience what Starting said

Sov found your other thread , people on MN certainly say what they think ! Hope you are enjoys chats and flirts

Starting at least you got a lovely bouquet

Romney that must have awful especially if you werent expecting to see them , did you mention ages ago your dc landing really good jobs/places on a course ? I might be wrong..if I am not you must be very proud

Going to try and achieve something today even if its just washing the kitchen floor

Hi all this lovely morning, Getting, yes both children landed good jobs within a week of each other in January, I am so proud of them both but very sad at the same time that he has now had to move closer to work but I suppose it was inevitable at sometime. Still have dd at home for the time being.

A question H wants to bring round some items he stored for me tomorrow, but knowing how I felt receiving the text I don't know if I'm strong enough to see him, don't want a big set back, what should I do ladies?

Goo I would still love to come up north to see you and your lovely beaches.

Romney, the fact that you are feeling apprehensive is a sign that you shouldn't do it. Can he drop the stuff elsewhere for you? Then you can choose to get it when you are ready. If I could have no contact with XP I would but it's not possible unfortunately.
Right, I am going to really test my theory that I now have the ability to predict communications from XP. It gives me a sense of power and control. The only rule for myself is to remain consistently and politely distant and detached. So, I predict by Wednesday he will have sent me a "poor me, why is everyone ignoring me?" text.
Sov, I'm not up to date on your other thread. What's the latest?
Hope everyone is fair to middling. Patience, I really hope you are ok. Your wisdom and humour are missed enormously. Please come back soon, it's not the same without you x

What Elsie said Rom. ((hugs))

Oh Elsie liking your thinking on xp.

Hi all

Bit brain dead at the moment so wont deal with everyone.

Had a lovely Mothers Day -kids did me really proud. Tea in bed and everything. Lovely hand made cards.

Working hard for interview and other money making stuff. Busy busy.

Rom -use an intermediary of some sort for drop off.

Starting - I think the medics didnt make a mistake about your H (())

Tea -glad you got champers and yes Im sure OW/GF would have something to say about it.

Goo - sorry you didnt see kids till late. But glad youve got a promising sounding man to meet over hols. Amazed over your position where government though it ok to completely shaft you financially -and then old witch rescues you -quite amazing but glad it happened

Kate glad you had a treated day- and hope the sugar rush showed for X and GF

Elsie -your daughter was a little star

Happy -DS1 did good.

Overall sorry it all kicked off and hoping to see Patience back soon as she is such a valued special person here!

Its kicking off here. H and I had an agreement -he broke it He still thinks he gets the bits he wants. He doesnt. Expecting World War 2 here. But not letting him away with it.

Sadly kids are starting to pick up on him . Saying he doenst see us enough and quite a few other things. Not whitewashing for H but answering age appropriately.

Aw, Mumfun, sorry h is letting the dc down. That's not on. Stick to your guns.

Mumfun sending you positive interview vibes - when is it ? Sorry WW2 is imminent maybe a peace treaty ?

Had a good day although my stupidity at maths is quite interesting ie how can I be brightish but unable to do primary schools maths . Determined to keep at it though

Did you get soemthing sorted with Learndirect then Sov ?

Hi all. Very very tired today. Work seems never ending but hey at least the old witch dragged me from the mire! lol at that :) Started on the front garden yesterday afternoon and normally I bloody love gardening - it's my main hobby - but was sooo knakcered after week of working 10 hour days, coming home, putting kids to bed, then working until after midnight, that I suddenly thought - oh, I'm so sick of doing EVERYTHING and stopped and went to bed for an hour before kids came home. Silly really. Tonight my best school friend who just lives round the corner invited me round for tea with my boys and her 3 - 9 year old and 5 year old twins. Her fella is on RAF and is posted away, so she's as good as a single mum. We had a lovely night so I've invitied her and her kids round next week. Nice to socialise with the kids after school, instead of just being on my own all wekk :)
Exh bought me a pot plant from the kids and a card which "hilariously" said "Mum asked for some help with the washing for Mother's Day...so we bought her a bigger basket". Ha fecking ha.
Oh and received a hilarious email today from exbf via Linkedin (that network site for professionals). It says "P would like you to join his professional network". What network is that then? The one that smokes dope, records birdsong and shags northumbrian pipe players?!!!!

Oh and Getting - I can't do maths to save my life. Kids in Year 5 and 6 (9-11) have to do mental maths from a CD. I was in library at school oe day when they were doing it and I was mentally still working out question 1 when the kids had finished the bloody tape!!!!

Mumfun - yes, stick to your guns. He may start WW2 but you don't have to take up arms :)

Hello everyone and especially Patience if you're lurking,

Patience, I hope you're ok, I was knocked for six at your reaction to my post and still don't know how it was so wrongly interpreted. I only meant well and I'm so sorry if that wasn't clear. I know you're going through a very tough time and I really hope that very soon you'll feel able to come on and chat again. Can we draw a line under it and dare I say ..... "This too has Passed" ? come back chuck x

Morning all.

It's pouring here .

Shame that I got DS1 to put the washing out last night ready for the sun today.

What Pink says.

BTW, I found out that me and another dumpling share a birthday! Isn't that spooky? Hopefully she is just as action-oriented, feisty and forward moving as me and does not share my aggressive pushy domineering tendencies

Grrr no internet at home but the lovely people let me use my laptop here at Learndirect

Action orientated tick, feisty tick, forward moving tick mostly

Lovely post Pink

Well filed for divorce today and just in the nick of time as apparently as of tomorrow new government rulings will insist on mediation before a divorce process can begin . The solicitor said "I presume you dont want to be sitting across from Mr Getting talking about if you can work things out ? " Er no not really , what a night mare thought.

I decided this timing was a good omen on everything

Well done Getting . Will you revert to your maiden name? I still use my first (and only) husband's name.. I was too lazy to change it.

Hi everyone. Nice post Pink :) Hope you are well
Happy birthday girls! Have a glass on me!
Cool Getting - thought of mediation with any man at moment fills me with dread...do most blokes do mediation?
I'm a mixture of my married name (still a Mrs at school and on bank accounts etc) and maiden name - passport. Agree with Elsie - it's a hassle.
Feeling less worn down today. Relying on my mate setting me up with this bloke - hope she can manage it! VERY windy here. I mena the weather, not my digestion, although now I mention it...
Waves to everyone x

No I shall remain Mrs Gettingeasier , really cant get worked up about stuff like that. Anyway it would feel like I was disowning the dc iyswim

This internet not working is shocking and opened my eyes to how much I rely on it grrr

Might just post nonsense while its working

Go on - I'd love that! I might post some too!

Yes lets all have a nonsense day crvn k xfnmj jhkkplgdgnmklm,

that's mine.

Nite all xxx

Pink that an early night! Well done Getting for getting in before the changes, I wonder how many people realise its tomorrow the need to do mediation starts.